What if the problem in your sex life isn’t low libido… but the pressure, expectations, and conditioning you’ve been carrying for years?

In this conversation, Erica shares how she spent years believing she was broken, trying everything from therapy to self-help advice to “fix” her lack of desire — only to discover that the real issue had far more to do with safety, pressure, and the scripts women are taught about sex and relationships.

Together, Erica and Janna unpack the messages many women grow up with around sex, marriage, motherhood, and obligation, and explore what begins to shift when couples stop focusing on performance and start building experiences rooted in curiosity, comfort, and connection.

Register for Janna's live class for couples, called "The Truth about Women's Libido: Why Everything You've Tried Hasn't Worked and What To Do Instead" happening on Monday, May 18 at 5 pm or Tuesday, May 19 at 1 pm PACIFIC. Register here.

Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.

Ready to learn more? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.

Ready to learn as a couple? Get all the details about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together. Next round runs May 28 to July 26, 2026. Registration deadline is May 26.

Why do so many women feel disconnected from sex—even in loving relationships? In this episode, we unpack the two core motivations behind intimacy: avoidance and approach. When sex is driven by pressure, obligation, or fear—like avoiding conflict, guilt, or rejection—it’s no surprise that desire fades. Yet, this pattern is so normalized that many women end up believing something is wrong with them, rather than questioning the system itself.

Joined by renowned researcher Dr. Lori Brotto, this conversation explores what actually makes sex feel good—and worth wanting. From understanding why low desire is so common to redefining pleasure as the goal (not performance or frequency), this episode challenges everything you’ve been taught about intimacy. If you’ve ever felt like sex is something you “should” want but don’t, this will offer clarity, validation, and a new way forward.

Find all info about Dr. Lori Brotto here: https://www.loribrotto.com/

Register for Janna's live class for couples, called "The Truth about Women's Libido: Why Everything You've Tried Hasn't Worked and What To Do Instead" happening on Monday, May 18 at 5 pm or Tuesday, May 19 at 1 pm PACIFIC. Register here.

Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.

Ready to learn more? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.

Ready to learn as a couple? Get all the details about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together. Next round runs May 28 to July 26, 2026. Registration deadline is May 26.

Anthony shares his journey from defensiveness and disconnection to truly hearing his partner for the first time. Like many couples, they found themselves stuck in a cycle of repeating the same conversations, hoping something would finally click… but real change didn’t begin until willingness entered the picture.

Anthony opens up about the moment he recognized how deeply his upbringing had shaped his expectations around intimacy—and the courage it took to face that truth. His story is a reminder that while change is simple in theory, it requires a willingness to listen, grow, and see things differently.

If you’ve ever felt like your partner just isn’t getting it, this episode offers a hopeful glimpse into what’s possible when they finally do.

Register for Janna's live class for couples, called "The Truth about Women's Libido: Why Everything You've Tried Hasn't Worked and What To Do Instead" happening on Monday, May 18 at 5 pm or Tuesday, May 19 at 1 pm PACIFIC. Register here.

Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.

Ready to learn more? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.

Ready to learn as a couple? Get all the details about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together. Next round runs May 28 to July 26, 2026. Registration deadline is May 26.

Why are we still defining sex in a way that doesn’t feel good for many women?

In this eye-opening episode, my guest Anne and I challenge one of the most normalized (and harmful) beliefs about intimacy: that intercourse is the main event. Through Anne’s story, you’ll hear how cultural messaging, lack of real education, and silent expectations led to pain, confusion—and feeling broken.

But this conversation doesn’t stop there. Anne shares how she began to question everything, find her voice, and create a more honest, pleasurable, and connected relationship with her partner.

If you’ve ever wondered why sex doesn’t feel the way it “should,” this episode might change the way you see everything.

Register for Janna's live class for couples, called "The Truth about Women's Libido: Why Everything You've Tried Hasn't Worked and What To Do Instead" happening on Monday, May 18 at 5 pm or Tuesday, May 19 at 1 pm PACIFIC. Register here.

Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.

Ready to learn more? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.

Ready to learn as a couple? Get all the details about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together. Next round runs May 28 to July 26, 2026. Registration deadline is May 26.

I’ve been scratching my head for years trying to figure out how to help couples talk to each other about sex and share the helpful information on the podcast.

I knew that a simple, non-threatening video was necessary for both men and women to be able to send to their partners to explain the basic concepts.

I also knew that I needed to make the podcast accessible for newbies with an easy “start here” place to go (with 188 episodes, it just doesn’t work to begin with episode 1, although many try…).

And, lastly, I knew that both men and women needed guidance on how to start the conversation with their partners in a way that felt safe and doable.

And I’m SO FREAKIN’ HAPPY to announce that I have accomplished all of this and am ready to share it with you.

Today’s episode on the podcast is part of the men’s side of this "beginner's guide” but I’m sure everyone will enjoy it. I’ve edited 6 stories together- 3 from men and 3 from women, to highlight the commonalities of the sex struggle so many heterosexual couples face.

It’s an episode that I hope makes you see the bigger picture of what we are all facing from culture with individual differences sprinkled in.

If you want the full beginner’s guide, starting with the intro videos, here are the links:

Women’s Video

Men’s Video

(If you are looking for the conversation guides, sign-up for the videos and you’ll find them on the next page.)

Register for Janna's live class for couples, called "The Truth about Women's Libido: Why Everything You've Tried Hasn't Worked and What To Do Instead" happening on Monday, May 18 at 5 pm or Tuesday, May 19 at 1 pm PACIFIC. Register here.

Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.

Ready to learn more? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.

Ready to learn as a couple? Get all the details about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together. Next round runs May 28 to July 26, 2026. Registration deadline is May 26.

Jo shares her journey from confusion and pressure around sex to rediscovering connection, safety, and genuine pleasure with her husband.

She opens up about:

• How cultural messaging shaped her relationship with sex
• The hidden impact of “obligation” and silent pressure in long-term relationships
• The turning point that helped her and her partner finally understand each other
• Why emotional safety—not technique—is the foundation of real intimacy

If you’ve ever felt disconnected, confused, or pressured in your intimate life, this conversation will leave you feeling seen, hopeful, and inspired.

Register for Janna's live class for couples, called "The Truth about Women's Libido: Why Everything You've Tried Hasn't Worked and What To Do Instead" happening on Monday, May 18 at 5 pm or Tuesday, May 19 at 1 pm PACIFIC. Register here.

Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.

Ready to learn more? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.

Ready to learn as a couple? Get all the details about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together. Next round runs May 28 to July 26, 2026. Registration deadline is May 26.

Do you ever feel like you are the one with all the "baggage" in your relationship?

This is exactly how Liz felt for years. In every category she looked- religious, cultural upbringing, and past life choices, she felt inferior to her spouse. To make up for the gap, she tried to be the “perfect” wife by providing her husband sex and keeping her body up even through four pregnancies.

No surprise, it didn’t work out great.

Join us as we talk through:

1. The two major turning points in her marriage and how they helped transform her relationship.
2. Her reckoning with the cultural and religious teachings she was raised on.
3. What she’s experimenting with now to reclaim her joy and autonomy.

Register for Janna's live class for couples, called "The Truth about Women's Libido: Why Everything You've Tried Hasn't Worked and What To Do Instead" happening on Monday, May 18 at 5 pm or Tuesday, May 19 at 1 pm PACIFIC. Register here.

Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.

Ready to learn more? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.

Ready to learn as a couple? Get all the details about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together. Next round runs May 28 to July 26, 2026. Registration deadline is May 26.

When a couple can meet each other with non-judgmental empathy, it draws you closer to each other. Nobody is shamed, questioned or put down and it leads to a deeper intimacy.

This is the power of mutual vulnerability and it’s one of the bedrocks of a healthy marriage (and sex life).

But most people don’t do a very good job at it! (which makes sense- who taught us how???)

In today’s podcast episode, my husband and I explored this topic, sharing what we were taught about vulnerability, offering a role-play of what to do (and not to do), and practical tips on responding to vulnerability effectively.

If you thought new sex positions were the key to hot sex, think again! Mutual vulnerability leads to safety and you can’t get sexier than safety!

I hope you enjoy this feel-good episode 🙂

Register for Janna's live class for couples, called "The Truth about Women's Libido: Why Everything You've Tried Hasn't Worked and What To Do Instead" happening on Monday, May 18 at 5 pm or Tuesday, May 19 at 1 pm PACIFIC. Register here.

Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.

Ready to learn more? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.

Ready to learn as a couple? Get all the details about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together. Next round runs May 28 to July 26, 2026. Registration deadline is May 26.