Ding ding ding!!!! Ladies and gentlemen and children of all ages!!! Welcome to tonight's fights. We have a heck of a show for you with people punching people and hilarious hijinks. Hold onto your beer, cause it is going to get foamy.

The 1985 film Gymkata set out to answer the question: is gymnastics a kick-ass martial arts style? The film then quickly answered that question with a resounding "no."

Though Austin Powers eventually won the fight in Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me, Mini Me definitely messed him up. The round two battle of Austin Powers in Goldmember, however, was all Austin.

The fight scene from They Live is both epic and completely ludicrous. . Both men landed devastating blows, but no matter what, they kept getting up. Every time the fight seemed settled, it started back up again for another brutal round. No person could possibly take the beating Frank and Nada gave each other.

The 2004 adaptation of The Punisher is a very dark tale of a man getting revenge for the murder of his family. The battle between Frank Castle and The Russian packs the punches and the laughs. Frank's gun is no good because the Russian bends the barrel, and even a grenade proves useless. The comedy comes from the question of what it takes to defeat the Russian. As it turns out, a pot of boiling water does the trick.

The Clone Wars is often regarded as one of the weakest films in the Star Wars franchise, and part of that could be the completely ridiculous Anikan Skywalker and Obi-Wan Kenobi lightsaber duel against Count Dooku. Obi-Wan is easily incapacitated and Anakin gets his hand cut off during some of the lamest choreography in the franchise. As if the fight wasn't silly enough, Yoda comes in to save the day, and none of his flips or moves is enough to defeat Dooku.

Picking the funniest fight scene from Kung Fu Hustle is like choosing the most unsettling scene from Human Centipede; there are so many to select from. The Landlady and her husband, the Landlord, are Kung Fu masters, but they are no match for the legendary assassin, the Beast. Each ridiculous attack launched by the couple is thwarted by the Beast in an even more hysterical fashion. The fight plays out like a Three Stooges slapstick comedy with over-the-top martial arts violence.

In the movie Airplane!, Captain Oveur inappropriately asks Joey if he likes movies about Gladiators, and the fight scene from Spartacus is almost certainly why. The 1960 Stanley Kubrick classic features plenty of oily combat that was more like dancing than fighting, but the Spartacus/Draba match-up was the least convincing. What was supposed to be a fight to the death looked more like two sweaty guys trying really hard not to hurt each other. All of this lazy choreography was sluggishly executed by grown men in diapers, making it one of the most unintentionally funny fight scenes in cinematic history.

Of course, I am just cribbing from CBR (https://www.cbr.com/funny-movie-fight-scenes-ranked/). But that is because I am lazy.

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FIGHT, FIGHT, FIGHT!! Those are the words that come to mind about this issue. What else can we say. Oh, I know, we can say that we have the awesome Brett Young from the Fantastic Pour podcast. He joined us to talk about how the Wizard brought this on, and now has to rue the consequences. You bet he is going to find out after he messed around. Comeuppance...bring them.

If you are asking yourself, how did we come to this horrific location with these terrible choices....than you are not paying attention. The Wizard. He did it. It is all his fault. What is your problem. Do you have something in your eye?

Or maybe you have been drinking. And if you have been drinking, what was it? And in what type of receptacle? Remember, if you are drinking out of some crazy horn or round bottomed crystal, that is chaos drinking.

Back to the fight. The Wizard deserves everything that he gets. Especially being beaten by a sea monkey on a string. I mean, how can he even show his face at the Bar With No Name after this?

And what about Dragon Man? What about Mr. Pacifism? Why would you flame someone in the backside if you are into peace? Nobody wants a heat enema!!!

That just leaves us with Blaastar knocking the blocks off of Darla. I really have nothing else to say about this. Not without getting dirty.

And that was this issue. It was a thing we read and discussed.

Please check out Brett's podcast, Fantastic Pour podcast.

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Our show supports the Hero Initiative, Helping Comic Creators in Need. http://www.heroinitiative.org/

I want you all to get off your seats, pull out your lighters or your cell phones, and get ready to listen to some boys bring you the music in an absolutely unplugged manner. And by unplugged, I mean I do not know what I am writing right now.

Breakfast; is it the food of champions or is it the lazy man's late-night snack. Who knows? I do know that chaos will reign supreme in my house when I bring home hot dogs from Costco at 10 AM. So be like me and drive your family crazy!

What about sleazy people in sleazy cafes? Are they stereotypes, or are they just dives? Are you going to need a tetanus shot if you make the mistake of sitting down? Will you sneeze after leaving and find an entire dish cloth has fallen out of your nose? Probably.

And then we have the Inhumans being all high and mighty in their castle in the sky. Who do they think they are? Some type of mafic space race that sucks gas. Well...yes, because they are.

I just have nothing to say here.

And then we have the Baxter Building all cut up. Who would want to live in that place? No walls, so drafty, no privacy....all of your stuff being shown to the world. Noone in their right mind would want to live in this glass house.

So there. I am not sure what else I can tell you about this issue. We came, we saw and we read.

We also have some merchandise over at Redbubble. We have a couple of nifty shirts for sale. https://www.redbubble.com/people/jeffrickpresent/?asc=u

Check out our lovely website with some of the art at: https://jeffandrickpresent.wordpress.com/2025/02/23/ff-6-save-the-tiger/

You can also subscribe and listen to us on YouTube!

Our show supports the Hero Initiative, Helping Comic Creators in Need. http://www.heroinitiative.org/