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I took myself on a date… and baby, I did NOT come to play.

No plus one.
No distractions.
Just me, my thoughts, a perfectly cooked steak, buttery lobster, and a drink that hit a little too smooth.

But this wasn’t just dinner… this was a whole moment.

Somewhere between the first sip and the last bite, I realized something real:
I’ve been waiting on other people to give me the love, effort, and attention I can give myself.

And yeah… we need to talk about that.

In this episode of This Isn’t That, I’m taking you with me on my solo date night—awkward moments, main character energy, quiet realizations, and all. We’re laughing, we’re reflecting, and we’re stepping into a version of ourselves that doesn’t wait to be chosen.

Because this isn’t loneliness…
This is self-love in real time.

So if you’ve ever felt uncomfortable being alone…
If you’ve been pouring into everybody but yourself…
Or if you just need a reminder that you are THAT girl—even by yourself—

Press play.

Your table is already reserved. 🍷✨

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Ever looked up in a relationship and thought...

"Wait... when did I stop being me?"

In today's episode of This Isn't That, I'm getting real (and a little too honest) about the time I slowly started changing myself to fit what I thought a man wanted. From switching up my personality, to dressing different, to literally second-guessing everything I did-yeah... we're unpacking ALL of it.

And don't worry... we're laughing too. Because baby, the realization phase? Embarrassing. Humbling. Necessary.

This episode is for anyone who's ever; shrunk themselves to keep a relationship, ignored their own voice to avoid conflict, looked back and said "girl... what were you doing?"

I'm sharing the moment it all clicked, how I found my way back to myself, and why losing that relationship was actually the best thing that could've happened.

And stick around till the end-because that motivational talk? Yeah...it's one you didn't know you needed.

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I’m not even gonna lie… this episode almost didn’t happen.

Because I was this close to crashing out.

You know that feeling? When your emotions are loud, your thoughts are louder, and all you want to do is text them one last time just to feel something back?

Yeah… that.

In this episode, I’m letting it all out—the confusion, the anger, the hurt, and the part nobody really talks about… still wanting someone who already let you go.

From the “it’s complicated” conversations…
to the closure that wasn’t really closure…
to the moment everything actually ended—

this is raw, unfiltered, and very real.

No pretending I’m healed.
No acting like I’ve got it all together.

Just me… choosing not to lose myself in a moment that could’ve cost me my peace.

If you’ve ever fought the urge to crash out after a breakup…
this one is for you.

Because sometimes…
it’s not about getting them back.

It’s about getting YOU back.

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This episode starts with an apology.
Not the dramatic kind. The honest kind.

In this episode of This Isn’t That, I’m breaking the silence and telling the truth about where I’ve been, why I went quiet, and what it means to take responsibility without self-shaming. From resetting expectations to showing up imperfectly, this is a real-time reset, not a polished comeback.

I’m also sharing a deeply personal story about driving eleven hours from South Carolina to Michigan in the middle of winter to see my kids while navigating the emotional weight of separation, custody battles, and the ache that never quite leaves a mother’s body. What started as a clear, peaceful drive turned into a snow-covered reminder that healing, motherhood, and rebuilding don’t follow straight lines.

This episode is about breakdowns in gas station parking lots.
About doing hard things scared.
About asking for help without meaning to.
About realizing that slow progress still counts.

If you’ve been carrying a lot quietly, feeling behind, or trying to keep moving through conditions that feel unfair, this conversation is for you. You’re not failing. You’re navigating. And sometimes staying on the road is the bravest thing you can do.

We’re resetting.
We’re showing up honestly.
And we’re moving forward, slow and steady.

This isn’t that.

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The calendar flipped, but you don’t need to. We’re pushing back on the “new year, new me” pressure and choosing a gentler, more honest shift: same life, new boundaries. Instead of chasing a total reboot, we’re focusing on small, repeatable choices that protect energy, reduce guilt, and make room for the kind of growth that actually lasts.

We unpack why January hype so often backfires, and how quiet, consistent actions outpace dramatic announcements. You’ll hear practical ways to do less but do it better: shorter replies without long explanations, scheduled rest treated like a real commitment, and simple scripts that help you say no under pressure. We talk through the moment you realize you’re pouring into spaces that don’t pour back, and how to step away with clarity rather than resentment.

There’s also a honest look at pushback: some people prefer you without boundaries. We name that reality, and offer a mindset shift for staying steady when others say you’ve changed. Choosing peace over people pleasing doesn’t make you cold; it makes you clear. That clarity helps the right relationships grow stronger while freeing you from constant performance and accessibility. If you’ve been craving a softer pace, fewer drains, and a year that feels intentional instead of urgent, this conversation gives you language, tools, and permission to protect what matters most.

If this lands, tap follow, share it with a friend who needs a boundary boost, and leave a quick review with one boundary you’re setting this year. Your small choices can change everything—what’s the one limit you’ll keep?

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In this raw and ridiculously real episode, Alyssa B. takes us behind the bathroom door-arms sore mid-retwist, Apple Music on shuffle, and a full-on breakdown brewing in the mirror. From the tangled mess of healing while in a relationship to flashbacks of Rashad-level nonsense, she packs what it means to date when your heart's still under renovation. With humor, honesty, and a little self-love sermon-this is your reminder that healing is not liner-but your edges still deserve to be laid.

Whew. Where do I even start? Your girl has been MIA, but not without reason. In this reintroduction episode, I’m pulling back the curtain on life lately—because babyyyyy, the ghetto has been active. From burnout to breakthroughs, from “I quit” moments to “I’m built for this” realizations, we’re unpacking it all. This isn’t a comeback—it’s a realignment. Press play and let’s catch up like old friends over wine and Wi-Fi. This Isn’t That… and I’m back in my bag.