Finding a therapist can feel overwhelming. But finding the right therapist is about much more than scrolling through a directory.

In Part 2 of our BIPOC Mental Health Month series, Licensed Psychologist Dr. Jason Herndon and Licensed Clinical Social Worker Philicia Ross break down what actually matters when looking for a therapist. They discuss how to identify your needs before your first session, navigate insurance and self-pay options, understand what "fit" really means, and why shared identity alone doesn't guarantee an effective therapeutic relationship.

They also explore the ongoing conversation around culturally responsive care, therapeutic alliance, and the research behind why many Black clients seek Black therapists, not because race alone determines competence, but because safety, trust, and not having to constantly explain your lived experience matter.

Whether you've never been to therapy before or you're looking for a therapist who better fits where you are now, this episode offers a practical roadmap to help you begin.

In This Episode:

• The five steps to finding the right therapist
• How to know what you need before starting therapy
• Understanding cost, insurance, and affordable care options
• Why therapist "fit" matters more than credentials alone
• Shared identity, cultural humility, and what the research actually says
• Where to find therapists and how to evaluate directories
• How to reach out to a therapist and make the most of a consultation

Resources Mentioned:

• Inclusive Therapists
• Therapy for Black Girls
• Open Path Collective
• Loveland Foundation
• National Queer & Trans Therapists of Color Network
• Employee Assistance Programs (EAP)
• Graduate Training Clinic

Wonder Club Reflection:
Before you begin searching for a therapist, take a moment to reflect on what you hope will be different because of therapy, what would help you feel safe enough to be honest, and whether you're looking for comfort, challenge, or a balance of both. Consider what kind of therapeutic relationship would best support your growth. As Jason says, seek comfort and seek fit. And as Philicia reminds us, the research starts with you.

Connect With Philicia:

Instagram: @byphilicia | @villageofsoundmind

Website: villageofsoundmind.co

Substack: byphilicia.substack.com

Connect With Jason:

LinkedIn: Jason L. Herndon

Substack: somemen.substack.com

🎙️ Follow The Weight & The Wonder on YouTube, Instagram, TikTok, and wherever you get your podcasts.

Until next time, hold the weight and find the wonder.

In the first episode of our BIPOC Mental Health Month series, Jason Herndon, PsyD, and Philicia Ross, LCSW-C., explore why conversations about mental health in BIPOC communities cannot be separated from history, culture, and systemic barriers.

Together, they unpack the legacy of drapetomania, the overdiagnosis and misdiagnosis of Black children, the differences between psychology and social work, and how access to care is shaped by insurance, representation, and community support. They also discuss John Henryism, the Strong Black Woman Schema, weathering, respectability politics, and the role faith has played in many communities' relationships with mental health care.

Rather than asking, "Why don't people just go to therapy?" this conversation asks a different question: What has happened historically that makes seeking help feel so complicated?

In This Episode:

• Why BIPOC Mental Health Awareness Month matters
• Drapetomania and the historical misuse of mental health diagnoses
• The overdiagnosis and misdiagnosis of Black children
• Psychology vs. social work: understanding the difference
• Community care, insurance, and barriers to accessing therapy
• Why cultural responsiveness matters in mental health care
• John Henryism and the Strong Black Woman Schema
• Weathering and the impact of chronic stress
• Respectability politics and emotional survival
• Faith, spirituality, and therapy
• Why distrust of mental health systems didn't come out of nowhere
• What healing can look like moving forward

Follow Us:

Instagram: @weightandwonderpodcast

YouTube: @TheWeightandtheWonder

Tiktok: @weightandwonder

Connect With Jason:

LinkedIn: Jason L. Herndon

Substack: somemen.substack.com

Connect With Philicia:

Instagram: @byphilicia @villageofsoundmind

Substack: byphilicia.substack.com

Website: villageofsoundmind.co

This week, we invite you to reflect on this question:

What messages did you grow up hearing about therapy, mental health, or asking for help? How have those messages shaped the way you care for yourself today?

Everyone online is debating who the villain of Love Island USA Season 8 is. Jason and Philicia think the answer is much bigger than any one Islander.

In this episode, they explore what happens when dating, attachment, emotional regulation, race, gender, and reality television collide inside a highly manufactured environment. Instead of diagnosing contestants, they examine the systems shaping their behavior—from sleep deprivation and editing choices to production incentives and public voting.

Together they unpack why emotional intelligence looks different under chronic stress, how reality TV amplifies our fundamental attribution error, and why viewers often confuse nervous system reactions with personality. They also explore the developmental realities of dating in your twenties, the pressure cooker of forming relationships on camera, and what Love Island reveals about how we think love is supposed to work.

The conversation also takes a deeper look at race, colorism, gender expectations, and intersectionality within the villa. Jason and Philicia discuss how production can create diversity without necessarily creating inclusion, and why dating shows often reproduce the same social dynamics that exist outside the villa.

Rather than asking who the "good" or "bad" Islanders are, this episode asks a different question:

What happens when a system is designed to manufacture conflict—and we mistake that conflict for character?


In This Episode:
-Production is the villain (the system)
-Emotional intelligence and nonverbal communication
-Competing for love, the triangle, and depth
-Race, colorism, ethnicity, gender


Did You Consider?
Jason reflects on whether we've become too rigid in our expectations of dating, and why ethical, honest exploration with multiple people isn't inherently unhealthy.

Philicia explores how reality dating shows externalize self-worth, arguing that helping people recognize their inherent value may be the antidote to treating love as a competition.


Follow Us:
Instagram: @weightandtwonderpodcast
Spotify: The Weight and The Wonder Podcast
Tiktok: @weightandwonder

Connect With Jason:
LinkedIn: Jason L. Herndon
Substack: somemen.substack.com
Website: integratedpsyche.net

Connect with Philicia:
Instagram: @byphilicia @villageofsoundmind
Substack: Liberation Letters byphilicia.substack.com
Website: villageofsoundmind.co

Follow the conversation and share your thoughts:
Who do you think is the real villain of Love Island?