In this deeply personal and emotional episode, we continue the story with Part 2 of Julie’s childhood—diving into the reality of growing up with a parent struggling with drug addiction, abuse, and instability. From discovering her dad’s meth use to witnessing the paranoia, manipulation, and fear that followed, this episode paints a raw and honest picture of what life looked like behind closed doors. Julie shares what it was like living in isolation, navigating unsafe situations, and even making the terrifying decision to call 911 when things escalated.

As the story unfolds, we get into the aftermath—her mom’s incredibly brave decision to work with the DEA, the arrest, and the complicated emotions that come with loving someone who caused so much harm. This episode doesn’t shy away from the long-term impact of childhood trauma, including fear that followed into adulthood, struggles with boundaries, and the ongoing process of healing. It’s a powerful conversation about survival, resilience, and the messy reality of holding both truth and empathy for a parent who caused pain.

We also talk about what it looks like now—navigating a relationship (or lack of one) with her dad as his health declines, processing guilt, and asking the hard question so many people face: do you owe someone closure just because they’re family? If you’ve ever grown up in a toxic or abusive environment, or struggled with setting boundaries with a parent, this episode will hit close to home.

If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic abuse, you’re not alone. You can call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 or visit thehotline.org or text START to 88788, confidential help is available 24/7.

New episodes drop every Wednesday. Follow the show so you don’t miss what’s next, and find us on Instagram to be part of the conversation. We’d love to hear your questions!

Julie is a podcast manager who helps people tell the stories they’ve been too scared to share. If you’ve been thinking about starting a podcast… this is your sign. Home - Julie Beck LLC

In this deeply personal episode of The Stories We Leave, we shift the focus to Julie’s childhood—growing up in a small rural town in Missouri with young parents, a close-knit family, and a life that from the outside might have looked simple. But beneath that surface was a home shaped by control, fear, and instability. Julie shares what it was like navigating an abusive household, where everything revolved around keeping the peace, and how early experiences with emotional and physical abuse impacted her sense of safety, identity, and relationships.

This is part 1 of a 2-part episode, where we begin unpacking the realities of childhood trauma—living with an unpredictable parent, witnessing domestic violence, and growing up in survival mode. Julie opens up about the contrast between fear and normalcy, the role her mom played as a steady and safe presence, and how those early years shaped the way she approaches parenting, relationships, and healing today.

We also start to uncover another layer of Julie’s story as the conversation leads into addiction and its role in her family dynamic—something we’ll dive deeper into in part 2. Through humor, honesty, and vulnerability, this episode highlights how even the hardest childhood experiences can lead to growth, perspective, and a commitment to doing things differently.

If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic abuse, you’re not alone. You can call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 or visit thehotline.org for confidential support.

New episodes drop every Wednesday. Follow the show so you don’t miss what’s next, and find us on Instagram to be part of the conversation. We’d love to hear your questions!

Julie is a podcast manager who helps people tell the stories they’ve been too scared to share. If you’ve been thinking about starting a podcast… this is your sign. https://juliebeckllc.com/

In Part 2 of Ryann’s coming out story, we move beyond the internal journey and into the real-life moments that follow—telling family, navigating reactions, and figuring out what happens next. From coming out as gay in college to later coming out as trans, this episode dives into the fear, uncertainty, and emotional weight that comes with saying the words out loud. We talk about what it feels like to finally share your truth, the anxiety of how people will respond, and why the people closest to you can sometimes be the hardest to tell.

We get into the complicated reality of family reactions—from supportive conversations to confusion, distance, and unmet expectations. Ryann shares what it was like coming out to parents, the pressure of feeling like you’re changing everything, and the surprising ways people process identity shifts. We also talk about the second coming out—transitioning later in life, navigating marriage, and what it looks like to give each other space to grow while staying connected.

This episode also explores what it looked like inside our relationship during that time—especially while navigating pregnancy, parenting, and two completely different internal experiences at the same time. We talk honestly about what it means to support your partner when you don’t fully understand what they’re going through, the concept of “living in two different worlds,” and how communication (even messy, unclear communication) kept us moving forward.

And of course, we share what it was like telling our kids—their reactions, what surprised us most, and why kids often handle big life changes better than adults. From resistance to acceptance to moments that hit harder than expected, this part of our story is one we’ll never forget. This episode is about identity, relationships, and the reality that coming out isn’t just one moment—it’s something you navigate over and over again.

New episodes drop every Wednesday. Follow the show so you don’t miss what’s next, and find us on Instagram to be part of the conversation. We’d love to hear your questions!

We’ve linked the books we talked about below—just a heads up, they’re affiliate links, so we may earn a small commission (at no extra cost to you).

He’s My Mom

It Feels Good To Be Yourself

Jack (Not Jackie)

Julie is a podcast manager who helps people tell the stories they’ve been too scared to share. If you’ve been thinking about starting a podcast… this is your sign. https://juliebeckllc.com/

This episode is where everything starts to shift. We’re going all the way back—before the labels, before the language, before any of this made sense—to talk about Ryann’s earliest memories, identity, and what it felt like growing up without the words to explain it. From being labeled a “tomboy” in the 90s to that first holy shit moment of realizing “I’m a lesbian,” this episode walks through what it’s like to figure yourself out in a world that doesn’t reflect you back.

But this story doesn’t stop at coming out. Years later—married, with kids, and a life already built—things started to shift again. What began as curiosity during COVID turned into something deeper: questioning identity, discovering trans stories online, and realizing there might be more beneath the surface. We talk about the slow unraveling of that realization, the fear of what it could mean for our marriage and family, and the internal battle between staying safe and being fully seen.

We also get into the decision to pursue top surgery, what that process looked like, and the unexpected truth that followed: even after surgery, something still didn’t feel complete. That realization opened the door to an even bigger shift—one that led to hormone therapy, redefining identity, and navigating what it means to transition later in life. This isn’t a clean, linear story—it’s messy, emotional, and real in a way that so many people will recognize, whether you’re in the LGBTQ+ community or not.

This episode is Part 1 of Ryann’s transition story—focusing on the internal journey, the denial, the fear, and the moments that quietly change everything. In the next episode, we’ll get into what happens when those internal shifts become external—coming out, telling the kids, and how it all actually unfolds.

New episodes drop every Wednesday. Follow the show so you don’t miss what’s next, and find us on Instagram to be part of the conversation. We’d love to hear your questions!

Julie is a podcast manager who helps people tell the stories they’ve been too scared to share. If you’ve been thinking about starting a podcast… this is your sign. https://juliebeckllc.com/

In this episode of The Stories We Leave You, Julie and Ryann continue their journey into LGBTQ+ family planning and share the real, unfiltered story behind growing their family beyond twins. Picking up where they left off, they dive into what it looked like to revisit the idea of having more kids after feeling overwhelmed, how “baby fever” crept back in, and the very real, very quick decision to try again. From navigating the emotional side of starting over to figuring out logistics like choosing between a known donor and a sperm bank, this episode gives an honest look at what it takes to build a family in a nontraditional way.

They walk through the process of selecting a sperm donor through a sperm bank, what to look for (and what actually matters), and why it was important for them to choose an open donor their children could potentially connect with later in life. Julie and Ryann also share the financial realities of buying sperm and going through the IUI (intrauterine insemination) process—including why they chose a clinical route instead of trying at home. What they expected to be another long journey like their first experience turned into something completely different… getting pregnant on the first try.

Beyond the logistics, this episode also touches on the emotional layers of LGBTQ+ conception—decision-making as a couple, navigating roles in pregnancy, and what it means to feel connected to your children in different ways. They open up about the realities of pregnancy during COVID, the conversations around who would carry their final child, and how they ultimately decided what was right for their family. This is a raw, funny, and deeply honest look at trying to conceive as a queer couple, filled with both practical insight and real-life moments that make you feel a little less alone.

New episodes drop every Wednesday. Follow the show so you don’t miss what’s next, and find us on Instagram to be part of the conversation. We’d love to hear your questions!

Julie is a podcast manager who helps people tell the stories they’ve been too scared to share. If you’ve been thinking about starting a podcast… this is your sign. https://juliebeckllc.com/

In this episode of The Stories We Leave You, Julie and Ryann take a deep dive into one of the most requested parts of their story — how they built their family as an LGBTQ+ couple. From always knowing they wanted kids to realizing just how complicated that journey would be, they walk through the emotional, logistical, and often unexpected realities of trying to conceive without a “traditional” path. What started as a simple idea quickly turned into months of research, conversations, and figuring things out as they went — with no clear roadmap and no one around them who had done it before.

They share the full, unfiltered process of choosing a known sperm donor, navigating boundaries, and having the kinds of conversations most people never even think about — legal agreements, parental rights, financial responsibilities, and the “what if” scenarios that come with it all. From awkward logistics (yes, including jars, syringes, and speculums) to the emotional weight of building a family in a nontraditional way, this episode gives a real look at LGBTQ+ family planning, donor conception, and what it actually takes behind the scenes.

Julie and Ryann also open up about the emotional complexities that came with using a known donor — how it impacted their relationship, identity, and sense of connection as parents. They talk about the unexpected challenges, including shifting dynamics with their donor, fears around how their kids might feel, and the importance of communication, legal protection, and trust throughout the process. This episode ends with the moment everything changed — finally getting pregnant after months of trying… and finding out it was twins.

The lesbian conception book they mention is The New Essential Guide to Lesbian Conception, Pregnancy, & Birth by Stephanie A. Brill and Kim Toevs.

New episodes drop every Wednesday. Follow the show so you don’t miss what’s next, and find us on Instagram to be part of the conversation.

Julie is a podcast manager who helps people tell the stories they’ve been too scared to share. If you’ve been thinking about starting a podcast… this is your sign. https://juliebeckllc.com/

In this episode of The Stories We Leave You, Julie and Ryann take a deeper dive into their origin story — from awkward early impressions to becoming best friends, falling in love, and navigating a relationship that didn’t exactly start the “traditional” way. What begins with humor (yes… including fart stories) quickly turns into a real, unfiltered conversation about how they met, what they first thought of each other, and how their connection grew over time. This episode blends humor with vulnerability as they reflect on the early days of their relationship and the moments that shaped everything that followed.

They open up about coming out, identity, and what it felt like to share deeply personal truths for the first time — including Julie’s experience growing up with a father struggling with drug addiction and incarceration. Ryann shares what it was like hearing those stories from a completely different upbringing, highlighting the contrast between their backgrounds and how that built a deeper level of trust and connection. The episode also touches on navigating sexuality, internal conflict, and the emotional complexity of falling in love while already in a relationship, offering an honest look at choices, growth, and what it takes to move forward.

Throughout the episode, Julie and Ryann reflect on how their relationship was built on friendship first — something they believe is the foundation of what has helped them last nearly two decades. From college days and shared apartments to building a life, raising kids, and evolving identities, this conversation captures the messy, imperfect, and deeply human reality of love, relationships, and becoming who you are.

New episodes drop every Wednesday. Follow the show so you don’t miss what’s next, and find us on Instagram to be part of the conversation.

Julie is a podcast manager who helps people tell the stories they’ve been too scared to share. If you’ve been thinking about starting a podcast… this is your sign. https://juliebeckllc.com/

In this episode of The Stories We Leave You, Julie and Ryann dive deeper into who they are as individuals and as partners, sharing the very different paths that shaped them long before they built a life together. From Julie growing up in a low-income household with early responsibility to Ryann’s more traditional middle-class upbringing, this conversation explores how those differences show up in their marriage, parenting, and everyday life. It’s an honest look at identity, privilege, work, and the experiences that quietly shape how we move through the world.

They also talk about career pivots, burnout, and how becoming parents forced them to rethink everything — from leaving teaching and retail schedules behind to building careers that actually support family life. This episode leans into the reality of modern parenting, including decision fatigue, feeding kids (why is that so hard?), and the constant balancing act between structure and chaos. It’s relatable, funny, and refreshingly unfiltered, especially as they navigate their different personalities — one more Type A and planned, the other more impulsive and go-with-the-flow — and how that dynamic actually works.

The conversation also touches on starting the podcast itself, from buying the domain to debating branding, photos, and what it means to “do it right” versus just starting messy. Along the way, they share glimpses into Ryann’s transition and how that continues to shape their family identity, as well as the ongoing, very real process of figuring things out in real time. At its core, this episode is about growth, partnership, and building a life that works for you — even if it doesn’t look like anyone else’s.

New episodes drop every Wednesday. Follow the show so you don’t miss what’s next, and find us on Instagram to be part of the conversation.

Julie is a podcast manager who helps people tell the stories they’ve been too scared to share. If you’ve been thinking about starting a podcast… this is your sign. https://juliebeckllc.com/