What if mental toughness is the wrong goal? Ultra-runner, executive coach and author Kay Bretz joins Tim and Mario to make the case for something better: mental gentleness. Kay went from sixteen years chasing marathon PBs to running 250km through the desert, then 500km across a week — and along the way traded the “excellence game” for something bigger.

He talks about turning right at the gate that changed his life, the night he signed up for his first ultra at 3am just to stop the spiral in his head, and the moment he convinced himself he'd grown “desert legs” and ran a course record because of it.

Tim and Mario dig into leadership without the buzzwords — presence, sitting with uncertainty, and the difference between being tough on yourself and being kind to yourself. If you've ever pushed through with a stick when what you needed was a gentle hand, this conversation will reframe everything.

In This Episode

• Why mental gentleness beats mental toughness — and why gentleness isn't softness

• The shift from the “excellence game” to the “mastery game,” and why chasing PBs has a ceiling

• “Who am I asked to be?” — the real question behind every big challenge

• The power of “gates” — small rituals that change your mental state

• The 3am decision, the desert legs story, and turning right at the white gate

  
  

Key Quote

“It's not how do I do it? It's who am I asked to be?” — Kay Bretz

Get In Touch

Guest — Kay Bretz

Website: turningright.com

Follow Kay on LinkedIn (most active)

Book: Turning Right: Inspiring the Magic

Mario Buchs

mario@healtheticacoaching.com

Follow @healthetica_coaching on LinkedIn, Instagram and more

Tim Buxton

tim@timothybuxton.com

Follow @timothykbuxton on Instagram, LinkedIn, YouTube, Threads and more

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What if the thing you've been skipping is the actual work? Tim and Mario pull apart the hustle-culture lie that exhaustion equals effort — and land on a harder truth: most of us aren't overtrained, we're under-recovered. From CEOs who protect their evenings to Mario's cats teaching a masterclass in the one percent, this episode digs into why rest gets treated like weakness when it's actually the multiplier.

Tim opens up about a footy injury that forced two weeks off running — and the identity spiral that came with it. Mario explains why 10,000 steps is a made-up number, why weight loss happens in the kitchen and not on the trail, and why sleeping in on a Saturday isn't the same as sleeping.

They get into peer pressure in running groups, the myth of removing yourself from your tribe when you rest, and the 10-minute roadside nap that turned a dying ultra-marathon attempt around. If you've ever felt guilty for stopping, this one's for you.

In This Episode

• Why “under-recovered” is a more honest diagnosis than “overtrained”
• The ego and peer pressure that make rest feel like failure
• Separating your identity from your output — “we're humans who run, not runners”
• Practical recovery levers: naps, midday breaks, and the 10,000-steps myth
• The 10-minute roadside nap that saved an Iraq 100 attempt

Key Quote

“I don't think we can overtrain. I think we're under-recovered. That's why we feel overtrained.” — Mario Buchs

Get In Touch

Mario Buchs

mario@healtheticacoaching.com

Follow @healthetica_coaching on LinkedIn, Instagram and more

Tim Buxton

tim@timothybuxton.com

Follow @timothykbuxton on Instagram, LinkedIn, YouTube, Threads and more

Discover More & Share

If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe on Spotify, YouTube, or your favourite podcast platform. We appreciate your reviews and shares — help others discover the power of aligning your purpose with your performance!

Fourteen concussions in three years. A career medically retired before it ever really got going. And on the other side of it, a coach who'll tell you the most important thing he does has nothing to do with cricket.

Trent Keep has coached at almost every level the game has — community, pathway, remote and Indigenous communities, the Australian blind cricket team — and now sits inside a professional setup at Somerset in the UK. But the thread running through all of it is the same: get to know the person before you ever coach the player.

In this conversation Tim and Mario sit down with Trent to pull apart what happens when sport is taken from you, why your weekends and your identity quietly disappear with it, and why he refuses to tell anyone their career is over without first knowing their story. He drops a paradox that should sit heavy with every parent: we're asking eight-year-olds to play like professionals, and professionals to play like eight-year-olds.

It's honest, funny, occasionally dark, and full of the kind of one percenters you can actually use — whether you coach a team, run a business, or raise a kid.

Key themes

• Why "I am a cricketer" is a dangerous sentence — and what to say instead

• The quiet grief of losing the game: identity, mates, and what to do on a Tuesday night

• Person-first coaching, and the Outlook reminder that changed a player's whole view of him

• Coaching the Australian blind team — when you can't just show someone, you have to be heard

• Communication vs comprehension: they heard something completely different to what you said

• The grassroots-elite paradox: we've got the whole thing backwards

• Environment first — if someone "doesn't fit," look at what you built before you blame them

• Three good things a night, embracing the stuff-ups, and not taking yourself too seriously

Standout quote

"We're asking these guys at the top end to play more like eight-year-olds, and eight-year-olds to play more like top-end cricketers. If there's any parents listening, that should probably sit pretty heavy with you." — Trent Keep