After recording my last episode on session two, something shifted in a way I didn’t expect. In this episode, I share what happened during the integration that followed, the moment my “scared self” surfaced, the tension that rose between Kyle and me, and what it felt like to finally be held in the middle of grief I’ve carried for years.

I talk openly about fear, loss, and the layers of pain connected to my brother, my father, and my mother, and how this release felt different from anything I’ve experienced before. Instead of days of emotional rebalancing, I found myself grounded almost instantly, as if something I’d been holding onto for far too long finally let go.

This episode reflects on what it means to feel safe in your body with another person, to lean into grief without being consumed by it, and to notice the quiet, powerful shift that happens when you begin to truly process and release what you’ve been carrying.

Listener discretion advised: This episode includes discussion of grief, family loss, and emotional processing.

In this second installment of my ketamine-assisted therapy series, I walk listeners through what my second session felt like from the moments leading up to the infusion to the psychological and emotional “downloads” that emerged once the ketamine took effect.

I begin by reflecting on how this session differed from my first, including subtle but meaningful changes in the pre-session environment and the clinical check-in process. I share the follow-up questions my care team asked based on what I experienced in the days between sessions.

This session also marked a dosage increase, moving from 45mg to 55mg, which opened the door to a noticeably different internal landscape. I describe what surfaced once the ketamine was administered: the themes, sensations, and insights that emerged, and how they connected to my ongoing work with medical trauma, grief, and nervous-system regulation.

As always, this episode is offered through both a personal and professional lens, bridging lived experience with clinical and performance-psychology perspectives for practitioners, patients, and anyone curious about how ketamine-assisted therapy can support healing in the context of injury, illness, and loss.

This episode is intended for educational and storytelling purposes only and does not replace professional medical or mental health care. Please consult a qualified healthcare provider before making any treatment decisions.

In this episode, I share my experience from the first session of my ketamine-assisted therapy journey. I walk listeners through what the session looked like from a nervous-system and emotional perspective—what surprised me, what felt challenging, and what I noticed in the hours and days that followed. This conversation is rooted in honest reflection and gentle processing, offering insight into what a first session can feel like for those navigating medical trauma, chronic illness, or the emotional weight of long-term care.

This episode is intended for educational and storytelling purposes only and does not replace professional medical or mental health care. Please consult a qualified healthcare provider before making any treatment decisions.