⚠️ Trigger Warning

This episode contains detailed discussion surrounding:

• Domestic and family violence
• Strangulation and choking
• Trauma and coercive control
• Psychological abuse
• Court processes involving victim-survivors

Listener discretion is strongly advised.

Episode Overview

In one of the most confronting and emotionally powerful episodes of Dear Divorce Diary, Darren Mort (Family Law Barrister) and Joplin Higgins (Practising Family Lawyer) tackle the deeply serious topic of strangulation within intimate relationships — and why it is considered one of the strongest indicators of future lethality in domestic violence situations.

Drawing on their extensive experience within the family law and court systems, Daz and Jop unpack:

• How coercive and controlling behaviour escalates into physical violence
• Why strangulation is treated as an extreme risk factor
• The devastating psychological and physiological impacts on victim-survivors
• How criminal and family law systems intersect in these matters
• The evidentiary challenges victims face
• Why trauma-informed legal support is critical
• The long-term impact family violence has on children
• The urgent need for education, prevention and cultural change

This episode is both educational and deeply human — offering insight into the realities faced by victim-survivors navigating separation, parenting and the legal system after severe domestic violence.

Key Discussion Points:

The Hidden Medical Consequences

Daz and Jop discuss how many victim-survivors never seek immediate medical treatment following strangulation incidents — often due to fear, trauma or shock.

They highlight serious medical consequences including:

• Acquired brain injuries
• Memory loss and amnesia
• Oxygen deprivation
• Esophagus and airway injuries
• Long-term neurological damage
• Severe psychological trauma and PTSD

Jop strongly encourages victim-survivors to seek urgent medical attention and documentation after any strangulation incident.

Why Victims Often Don’t Report Immediately

One of the most important parts of the episode examines why victim-survivors may delay reporting violence to police, doctors or the courts.

The conversation explores:

• Fear of retaliation
• Trauma responses
• Emotional paralysis
• Concern for children
• Financial dependency
• Psychological conditioning through coercive control

Daz explains how defence teams in court often scrutinise “contemporaneous reporting” — meaning whether incidents were immediately reported — despite the complex trauma responses victims experience.

About The Hosts

Darren Mort

Family law barrister, advocate and commentator focused on family violence, parenting matters and trauma-informed legal practice.

Joplin Higgins

Family lawyer, author and Director of Joplin Lawyers, recognised for her work in family violence advocacy and victim-survivor support.

Join The Conversation

If this episode resonates with you, or you have questions about family law, coercive control, parenting, domestic violence or separation:

• Connect via Instagram
• Reach out on TikTok
• Message through LinkedIn
• Share your topic suggestions for future episodes
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Listener Support

If this episode has raised concerns for you or someone you know, support is available through Australian domestic violence and crisis services.

You are encouraged to seek assistance from:

• Call Triple Zero - Police in emergencies
• Domestic violence support services
• Trauma-informed counsellors
• Medical professionals
• Legal practitioners experienced in family violence matters

Follow & Subscribe

If you’re navigating separation, parenting arrangements, or family court processes, Dear Divorce Diary offers real conversations and practical insights from experienced family law professionals.

Follow, like, and subscribe to stay up to date with upcoming episodes featuring Darren Mort (Family Law Barrister) and Joplin Higgins (Family Law Solicitor).

Real law. Real families. Real conversations.

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