What does it mean when you don’t believe in God, but still find yourself asking for forgiveness anyway? In this episode of The Gay Rugby Podcast, comedian Matt LeGrand joins the conversation to talk about spending 20 years as a missionary, unpacking religion, identity, and what happens when belief systems start to fall apart but the habits remain.They get into religious conditioning, guilt, sexuality, and the strange ways those early teachings stick with you long after you’ve moved on. It’s a conversation about faith, deconstruction, and the lingering voice of conscience that doesn’t always match what you believe anymore. And what does rugby have to do with spirituality? A mix of comedy and honesty about where you come from, and what it takes to unlearn it.

Episode 45 of the Gay Rugby Podcast gets into a side of queer culture that people see online all the time but rarely hear explained by the people actually living it.

We sat down with Pup Odie and Pup Hex, both rugby players, to talk about what pup play really is and how they found their way into the pup community. The conversation starts simple — what is pup play, what does puppy play actually mean — but it quickly turns into something more personal. They talk about the first time putting on a pup mask, the confidence that can come with it, and why anonymity can feel freeing instead of hiding.

We also get into how someone new might approach it. What “pup play for beginners” actually looks like, how people find others, and what it means to be part of a gay pup community in real life, not just online. There’s a lot of misunderstanding around it, especially when people compare pup play vs furry, so we take the time to break that down in a way that actually makes sense.

Like most things we talk about on the podcast, it’s less about labels and more about why people are drawn to it. For some it’s about identity, for others it’s about connection, and for a lot of guys it’s just a way to step out of their own head for a bit.

If you’ve ever searched what is puppy play, been curious about pup hoods, or wondered how people get involved in the pup community, this is a real conversation with people who are actually in it.

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A year ago, we sat down to record the first episode of the Gay Rugby Podcast without really knowing what it would become.Twelve months later, we found ourselves in Boston for the NORAM Cup, in New Orleans for Swamp Romp, at LA 7s during Pride weekend, and in Palm Springs with a camera bag, a couple microphones, and a growing list of people we were lucky enough to meet along the way.Episode 44 is us looking back at that first year. We talk about the weekends that got out of hand, the interviews we still can’t believe happened, the people who started as guests and ended up as friends, and the strange reality that this little rugby podcast somehow turned into a reason to travel, meet people from around the world, and keep saying yes to things.There are stories from Boston bars after the NORAM Cup, late nights in New Orleans during Swamp Romp, and the chaos of trying to cover LA 7s while everybody we knew seemed to be there at once. Somewhere between all of that, the podcast stopped being just about rugby and became a record of the people, places, and community that came with it.Thanks for being part of the first year.New episodes every week.