In this solo episode, betrayal trauma expert and host MaryAnn Michaelis, LCSW, CSAT, CPTT,

shares early findings from the Grief After Betrayal Impact Scale (GABIS)—drawing directly from the voices and lived experiences of listeners in this community.

This is the data of devastation.

Not just numbers—but real accounts of grief, identity loss, and the unraveling of reality after sexual betrayal.

Because research in this area is limited, these listener-informed insights offer a rare and powerful look at what betrayal trauma actually takes—from a person’s sense of self, safety, and connection.

Be sure to check out this episode @youtube.com/Human-Intimacy to view the data charts and slides.

MaryAnn walks through key early insights from survey responses, including:

• Why staggered disclosure is more common—and more damaging—than most people realize
• The reality that many betrayed partners are left to discover the truth on their own
• The sharp drop in identity and self-trust after betrayal
• The most common and painful forms of grief reported by listeners
• Why so many people are suffering in silence
• Where support is helping—and where it’s falling short
• The often-overlooked physical and health impacts of betrayal trauma

Across responses, one theme rose above the rest:

Loss.

Not just loss of a relationship—but loss of:

• identity
• safety
• trust
• reality
• and the future that once felt certain

As one listener shared:

“It’s the decades of never being truly known… the invisibility.”

Grief after betrayal is often misunderstood—or missed entirely.

This episode brings language to that experience, helping listeners recognize:

• This is grief
• This is trauma
• And this response makes sense

• Trying to make sense of your emotional response after betrayal
• Feeling like you’ve “lost yourself”
• Wondering why this feels so much bigger than just the betrayal
• Looking for validation, language, and understanding

This episode highlights key findings—but there is more to the story.

• Watch the full podcast with visuals: YouTube.com/human-intimacy
• Contribute your experience to the ongoing survey https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/Grief-scale
• Access the full presentation from the Human Intimacy Conference

If this episode resonates with you:

You are not overreacting. You are not alone.

What you’re experiencing is real—and it deserves care, support, and understanding.

If this episode helped you, consider sharing it. Someone else may need to hear that they’re not alone in this.

And as always—take care of yourself.