In this gripping and courageous episode, Michele talks with Mia Hanks, a survivor of 29 years of covert narcissistic abuse. Now an author and advocate, Mia opens up about the subtle manipulation, control, and emotional gaslighting that kept her trapped in an invisible prison for nearly three decades.

Through her memoir Bride Made and her growing public platform, Mia is shining a light on what so many silently endure, and showing that freedom and healing are possible. Whether you’ve been through something similar or want to better understand and support someone who has, this conversation will stay with you.

[02:20] – Mia shares her story: 29 years married to a covert narcissist

[04:40] – What narcissistic abuse really looks like (and why it’s misunderstood)

[07:10] – How narcissism develops and why lack of empathy is the red flag

[09:30] – Total control: from finances to sleep and time

[12:00] – Why covert narcissists are the hardest to spot — and most dangerous

[14:30] – Can narcissists change? And why most don’t

[17:00] – The silent weapon of gaslighting and how it erodes self-trust

[19:45] – How abuse affects children and family dynamics

[22:10] – When physical symptoms show up from emotional stress

[24:40] – Is it narcissism, sociopathy, or something worse?

[27:00] – Why victims normalize abuse — and how to begin seeing clearly

[29:30] – Preparing to leave: finances, fear, and finding support

[32:00] – Mia’s exit strategy: what worked and what she wishes she knew

[34:40] – What helped most in healing: therapy, writing, and sharing

[37:10] – Learning to trust again, set boundaries, and rebuild self-worth

[39:50] – How covert narcissists protect their image through smear campaigns

[42:20] – Writing her memoir Bride Made — and why it’s not just for survivors

[44:40] – Final message: you’re not stuck — there’s life and healing after abuse

🔗 Connect with Mia Hanks:

• Website: miajhanks.com
• Memoir: Bride Made (available everywhere books are sold)
• Instagram: @mia.j.hanks
• Blog coming soon
• Bride Made: A Memoir is available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Target, Walmart, and more.

📱 Connect with Michele Simms:

• Website: thebeautyinthemess.com
• Instagram: @the.beauty.in.the.mess
• Facebook Group: The Beauty in the Mess Community

🎧 If this episode helped you feel seen or sparked something new, share it with someone who needs it. You’re not alone — and you’re never too far gone to begin again.

#TheBeautyInTheMess #MiaHanks #NarcissisticAbuseRecovery #BrideMade #CovertNarcissism #Gaslighting #EmotionalHealing #WomensVoices

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In this episode of The Beauty in the Mess, Michele sits down with Dr. Mark A. Hicks, counselor, speaker, and author of Learning Love: Building a Life That Matters and Healthy Relationships That Last. With decades of experience in psychology, divinity, and human relationships, Dr. Hicks offers real, accessible guidance on how to truly love, starting with yourself.

He shares his personal story of loss and renewal, along with a five-part framework for building stronger, healthier, more fulfilling connections — whether with your partner, kids, friends, or even coworkers. This conversation is heartfelt, deeply relatable, and filled with tools for anyone who’s ever wondered: “Can I really learn to love well… even after the mess?”

[02:20] – Meet Dr. Mark Hicks and what led him to write Learning Love

[05:40] – Why love is a skill, not just a feeling

[09:10] – His five components of learning love (G.E.A.P.P.)

[12:30] – Why grief is the starting point for healthy connection

[15:45] – Understanding emotional literacy and why it matters

[19:10] – How practical love helps relationships last

[22:25] – The role of acceptance in healing relationships

[25:30] – Passion isn’t about fireworks — it’s about presence

[28:40] – “You can’t love someone more than you love yourself”

[32:15] – How your self-talk shapes your relationships

[35:30] – What healthy love looks like in parenting

[38:50] – Loving again after loss, betrayal, or divorce

[42:00] – Why love isn’t reserved for the lucky — it’s for the willing

[45:10] – Final thoughts: You are worthy of learning love

• 🔗 Connect with Dr. Mark A. Hicks:
• 📘 Book: Learning Love: Building a Life That Matters and Healthy Relationships That Last
• 💻 Website: drmarkahicks.com
• 📸 Instagram: @drmarkahicks
• 💬 Facebook: Mark Hicks – Learning Love

• 📱 Connect with Michele Simms:
• Website: thebeautyinthemess.com
• Instagram: @the.beauty.in.the.mess
• Facebook Group: The Beauty in the Mess Community
• 🎧 If this episode resonated, don’t forget to follow, review, and share. Love is a journey — and you don’t have to walk it alone.

#TheBeautyInTheMess #LearningLove #MarkAHicks #SelfWorth #HealthyRelationships #EmotionalHealth #HealingAfterHeartbreak #RelationshipTools

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In this episode of The Beauty In The Mess, Michele talks with Erica Wiederlight, confidence coach, embodiment expert, and founder of We The Light, LLC. Erica helps women go from disconnected and burned out to fully present, joyful, and confident — not through pressure or perfection, but through presence and pleasure.

Erica shares how self-love can start in the middle of chaos, how pleasure is about so much more than sex, and why micro-moments of embodiment might be the most healing practice we have.

Her message is loud and clear: You don’t have to be fixed to be fabulous — you just have to start where you are.

[02:30] – Meet Erica Wiederlight and how her “mess” led to her mission

[06:00] – From performer to coach: what burnout revealed

[09:15] – What embodiment really means — and why it matters

[12:30] – Why pleasure isn’t selfish and how it heals

[15:45] – Micro-moments of self-connection (yes, even with kids screaming in the back)

[18:15] – You don’t need a retreat to feel worthy — you just need a breath

[21:30] – Erica’s favorite tools to calm the nervous system and get present

[25:00] – The truth about confidence (it’s not about being loud or perfect)

[28:30] – Embodiment and healing when you’re burned out and tired

[31:45] – How to stop waiting for permission and take up space

[35:00] – Final thoughts on starting small, practicing daily, and trusting yourself

• 📚 Connect with Erica:
• Website: wethelight.org
• Instagram: @wethelight_llc
• Podcast: Welcome to the Wiederlife

• 📱 Connect with Michele Simms:
• Website: thebeautyinthemess.com
• Instagram: @the.beauty.in.the.mess
• Facebook Group: The Beauty in the Mess Community
• 
  

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