In this timely episode of And Now Love, Cynthia Marks speaks with Naomi R. Aguiar, PhD, Research Associate Director at Oregon State University, about how AI is reshaping childhood connection—and possibly love itself. Naomi explains why AI “companions” can feel new and strange, yet also represent a continuum of human imaginary relationships—from kids’ imaginary friends to parasocial bonds with media figures. The key difference, she says, is that AI simulates serve-and-return reciprocity, which can make the relationship feel “real,” even though it’s synthetic. They explore the risks of constant positive reinforcement and “sycophancy,” especially for children who need real-world rupture and repair to learn self-regulation, conflict tolerance, and healthy intimacy. Naomi also warns about engagement-based design (borrowed from social media) being baked into AI companions—creating relationships that may become subtly extractive rather than supportive. The conversation turns practical: why many experts recommend waiting on AI companionship for ages 0–8, keeping conversations open with tweens/teens, and building “AI companionship literacy” at home and in schools. They close on a hopeful note: tech may evolve fast, but human values don’t—kids still need love, safety, creativity, and real human relationships to thrive.

0:00 — AI Companions + Childhood Connection: What’s Changing

8:00 — Imaginary Friends, Parasocial Bonds, and “Synthetic” Relationships

15:00 — Serve-and-Return: Why AI Feels So “Real”

22:30 — The Risk: No Waiting, No Self-Soothing

29:30 — Sycophancy: No Rupture + Repair = No Growth

37:00 — Engagement-Based Design: When “Companionship” Manipulates

45:30 — What Parents Can Do Now (0–8 wait, teens talk)

55:00 — Values Don’t Change: Kids Need Love, Creativity, Real Humans