Supporting Educators When Behaviour Feels Challenging: Connection and Co-Regulation
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Michelle, a resource consultant and Western region director on the ECRCNO board, discusses relationships, connection, and responding to children’s needs in challenging moments. She describes how children move between exploring and returning for safety and connection, and encourages educators to stay curious and view behavior as communication (e.g., aggression as overwhelm, clinginess as a need for reassurance, refusal as independence/control).
When children resist support and escalate, she suggests “being with” them—staying calm, nearby, and available without pressure—rather than rushing to fix the moment, emphasizing co-regulation and resilience-building. She offers reflection questions for educators about how they respond, how to offer support children can receive, and how to stay present.
The episode closes with an invitation for Ontario resource consultants to join ECRCNO at ecrcno.ca.
00:00 Why Support Backfires
01:51 The Explore and Return Cycle
03:11 Behavior as Communication
04:06 When Comfort Escalates
04:47 Being With as Secure Base
06:03 Inside Out and Co-Regulation
07:40 Reflective Questions for Educators
08:40 Closing and ECRCNO Invitation