
Step 10 - Alan (Al-Anon)
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Alan takes his serenity seriously. ‘I guard my serenity with every fiber of my being. I guard that.’ And a big part of how he does that is his daily practice of Step 10. After the hard and perhaps deeper work of Steps 1-9, Step 10 offers something different: an ongoing practice of self-reflection and dedication to dealing with mistakes and missteps right as they come up. The payoff for reflection and admitting errors in the moment is something Alan takes seriously too.
‘It feels like a sense of accomplishment every day that I go to bed and say, ‘you know it wasn’t the perfect day, today. I said something I shouldn’t have said, or did something I shouldn’t have done… but I’ve dealt with it. Because the thing that bothered me for many, many years is that I would perseverate on what to do about things I had done wrong. And I would let that fester and cause a sickness inside me. I don’t feel that sickness anymore. It’s not that I don’t make mistakes. But I don’t feel like I’m carrying anything forward with me into the next day. And that creates a lightness.’
Step 10: Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.