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Seventeen years ago, I was a difficult, entitled client who had already failed four treatment centers. HR Brown owned the place where I finally got sober. He pulled me into his office one day, told me part of his story, and handed me his 12-year sobriety coin. He asked me to make a deal: in 12 years, I’d give that coin to a newcomer, and he’d hand me his 24-year coin. That moment planted hope in me when I had none.
This episode is that conversation. HR shares the night he had a gun in his mouth, the Easter morning he didn’t know was Easter when he finally surrendered, and the spiritual nudges that have shaped his life and ministry. We talk about why the physical side of addiction is only 10% of the problem, what families need to hear when their loved one says “I mean it this time,” and why recovery happens in relationships, not institutions.
If you’ve ever felt like God couldn’t possibly love you back, or you’re loving someone who keeps breaking promises, this one is for you.
Show Notes
Guest: HR Brown, founder of Renaissance Ranch and the man who helped me get sober
In this episode:
•(01:00) How HR and I first crossed paths in treatment
•(03:47) “I believed in God. I just didn’t think He believed in me.”
•(05:39) The night HR had a gun in his mouth and the angels he believes saved him
•(07:12) “Help me, help me, help me.” HR’s Easter morning surrender
•(10:58) The people who carried hope: Steve and Monk, the 300-pound biker
•(12:58) Why your loved one isn’t lying when they break the promise
•(16:12) Living life in 15-minute increments during active addiction
•(18:16) Why physical addiction is only 10% of the problem
•(19:19) The vision behind Renaissance Ranch
•(23:24) My spiritual anorexia and how the Ranch fed me
•(28:44) The 12-year coin moment that gave me hope when I had none
•(29:56) HR reveals he felt a nudge to give me that coin
•(31:36) Acting on spiritual promptings without rehearsing them first
•(34:15) The deal: “In 12 years, we meet back up”
•(38:34) The Easter basket and the note that called me a leader
•(42:54) HR’s wife at the golf tournament
•(48:26) “She was mine before she was yours.”
Worth marking:
•Hope is contagious. You catch it from people who already have it.
•Judge early recovery by what people do, not what they say.
•When your loved one says “I want help,” have a bed lined up. If they’re serious, they’ll go.
•You don’t get them sober and you don’t get them drunk. Stop carrying what isn’t yours.
•Spiritual nudges work when you act on them before you talk yourself out of them.
HR is in my book. I wrote about him in Unhooked: How to Help an Addicted Loved One Recover.
Resources:
•HR’s nonprofit, The SOLida Foundation, mentorship and scholarships for people leaving treatment: thesolidafoundation.org
•Unhooked on Amazon and Audible
•brickhouserecovery.com
•liveunhooked.com
Share this with one person who needs to hear it. That’s how the nudge keeps going.​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​

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