Self-reliance often begins as survival and slowly becomes a prison.

In this episode of Living the Third Way, Shae and Adrian explore how self-reliance forms in families where it wasn’t safe to struggle, need help, or fail. What begins as a protective adaptation can quietly turn into a belief that you must carry life alone and that suffering means you’re doing something wrong.

They examine how modern manifestation culture and New Thought spirituality reinforce this pattern by promising control over reality, while subtly placing the full weight of healing, happiness, and meaning back onto the individual. When pain can’t be “thought away,” it easily becomes personal failure.

Through the lens of Catholic anthropology and personalism, Shae and Adrian offer a different path: healing that happens in relationship, identity that is received rather than constructed, and a vision of the human person as a mind–body–soul unity. This episode invites listeners to lay down the exhausting work of doing life alone and to discover why dependence, rightly understood, is not weakness, but mercy.

Interested in deeper support?

We offer daily mentorship for individuals navigating family wounds, emotional overwhelm, and the slow work of healing in relationship. You can find out more at our website: https://adrianandshae.com

We’re also currently building a waitlist for the next cohort of our group program, Unmeshed, which guides participants through disentangling from family enmeshment and reclaiming their God-given identity through psychological and spiritual integration. Email us to express interest or be notified about the next cohort: hello@adrianandshae.com

Referenced in this episode

• The Mindful Catholic by Dr. Greg Bottaro