In this honest and very human conversation, Justin and Sarah sit down with their friends JJ and Jamey to talk about what it costs to tell the truth about who you are, and what it looks like to build a family afterward.

JJ grew up in a pastor’s home, became a missionary and theology professor, and spent years trying to pray his sexuality away. He shares the panic attack that sent him to the hospital, the reality show deal that surfaced everything he’d been avoiding, and the 40 day stretch of monasteries and wine country that finally pushed him toward honesty. He also talks about coming out slowly, one conversation at a time, before sharing his story publicly.

Jamey grew up in small town Tennessee, married young, and spent 16 years raising four kids. He remembers the moment his teenage daughter bravely shared she was attracted to another girl, how that opened something in him, and the long, painful process of ending his marriage and finally naming his own truth.

Together, they share how they met online, fell in love, and built a queer family in Nashville with four kids, two in college and two at home. They talk about “instant parenthood” for JJ, navigating school changes and safety issues, holding grief and joy at the same time, and the weekend JJ became a dad and lost his own father. School forms, therapy, Cub Scouts, prom committees, and drag queens all show up in this story.

They reflect on what they wish they could tell their 35 year old selves, why hard does not mean wrong, how to support someone who is coming out, and what it takes to choose audacity when your whole life shifts.

This episode is about leaving old scripts, starting over in the middle, and choosing family, truth, and joy in a place that does not always make that simple.

Takeaways & Talking Points:

• Growing up gay in conservative Christian spaces
• How a TV deal and a panic attack changed JJ’s life
• Jamie’s move from long marriage to finally speaking the truth
• What midlife coming out actually feels like
• Instant parenting and rebuilding family under pressure
• School transfers, safety, and helping kids find stability
• Grieving a parent while becoming one
• Dating long distance in a pandemic
• What supportive friends do well
• How to respond when someone comes out

Things We’re Learning (and Unlearning):

• Coming out is a long process, not a moment
• Faith and sexuality often need to be rethought with honesty
• The “right” choice can still feel painful early on
• Later-in-life coming out brings your whole story with you
• Kids can handle change when at least one home is steady
• You cannot rush someone’s timeline for truth
• “I love you” should be the first sentence
• It is not the job of the person coming out to hold your emotions
• Healing is slow, ordinary work
• Audacity means taking one brave step at a time

Stats Worth Knowing:

• Many LGBTQ+ adults say they sensed “difference” in childhood
• Family acceptance is a major mental health protector for LGBTQ+ youth
• Leaving high control religious environments can bring grief and isolation
• Queer families in conservative regions often face added legal and safety stress

This episode is for anyone coming out later in life, for parents trying to support their kids while sorting out their own beliefs, and for friends who want to show up well when someone they love trusts them with their story.

#RunningAhrens #FamilyConversations #ComingOutStories #QueerFamily #MarriageAndFaith #ParentingInTransition #LGBTQStories #RealTalk #ModernParenting #AudacityAndForward #MentalHealthMatters #ChosenFamily #PurposeDrivenLife #BeingHumanKind

In this honest, funny, and very real conversation, Justin and Sarah sit down with their oldest child, Mackenzie, the one who made them parents and set the curve for everyone who came after.

Born on Sarah’s birthday and right on her due date, Mackenzie talks about what it was really like to grow up as the first of four in a loud, intense, loving house. She shares how school started to fall apart in sixth grade, what it felt like to be “bad at turning things in,” and the huge shift that came when she was finally diagnosed with ADHD in high school.

She remembers demanding sports parents, running gassers, throwing up at practice, sabotaging her own basketball tryout, sneaking out, secret social accounts, and being “the mean big sister” who threatened her siblings to keep quiet. Then she walks through the hard parts of college: flunking out, hiding it, making herself sick with anxiety, fighting her way back in, and eventually graduating on her own terms.

Mackenzie also shares the story of coming out to her parents at a booth in a college bar, what she was most afraid of in that moment, and how that conversation reshaped their family and their expectations. Today, she talks about losing nearly 100 pounds, choosing therapy, working in a therapeutic autism school, and finally feeling at home in her own skin.

It is a story about being the first one through the wall. About messing up, owning it, and trying again. About a kid who grew up in chaos and found a life of purpose, care, and steady joy.

Takeaways & Talking Points:

• What it really feels like to be the oldest in a family of four
• How undiagnosed ADHD shapes school, behavior, and self-worth
• Sports, pressure, and the line between pushing and breaking a kid
• The “full-time job” of parenting a struggling teen, and what Mackenzie remembers
• Sneaking out, getting caught, burner phones, and why she was “bad at being bad”
• Coming out as bisexual to faith-shaped parents, and what everyone had to grieve and reframe
• College probation, reinstatement, and rebuilding trust after hiding the truth
• Finding her way back to special education and discovering work that fits how she is wired
• What it took to change her health, heal her anxiety, and choose movement for herself

Things We’re Learning (and Unlearning):

• Firstborns often carry invisible pressure no one named out loud
• Yelling and grounding can work short term, but shame lingers for years
• Kids are not being “lazy” when their brains are working differently
• Coming out is not just about identity, it is about safety, belonging, and being believed
• Parents have to grieve their expectations so kids can grow into who they really are
• Healing takes time, therapy, and a lot of small, boring choices
• Your child’s path does not have to be linear to be good

Stats Worth Knowing:

• About 1 in 20 children are estimated to have ADHD, and late diagnosis is common, especially for girls
• Roughly 30 percent of first-generation college students leave school within three years, often due to academic and mental health struggles
• More than half of LGBTQ+ young people say family acceptance strongly protects their mental health

This episode is for oldest kids who felt like the family experiment, for parents wondering if they “ruined everything” with their first, and for anyone trying to rebuild trust, identity, and health after a rough start.

#RunningAhrens #FamilyConversations #OldestChildEnergy #ADHDStories #ComingOutStories #ParentingAdultKids #RealTalk #GrowingUpAhrens #FullHeartLiving #FamilyStories #MarriageAndParenting #MentalHealthMatters #ModernParenting #PurposeDrivenLife

What happens when the person you grew up with becomes one of the fastest cyclists in the world? And what happens when your life together becomes a mix of airports, race radios, tiny apartments overseas, and two babies born into a world that never slows down?

In this episode of Running Ahrens, we sit down with Christian and Leah Vande Velde, childhood friends, high school sweethearts, and partners who have spent three decades learning how to stay connected through a life that has never been simple.

From third grade band class in Lemont to the Tour de France to building a new chapter in Greenville, their story is full of love, detours, restarts, and the kind of grit you only learn by living it.

This isn’t a sports story.
It’s a relationship story.
It’s about what it looks like to keep choosing each other when the pace is fast, the pressure is real, and the path is rarely straight.

What We Cover

• Meeting in third grade and finally dating senior year
• Breaking up so they could grow, and finding their way back
• Choosing cycling over college and stepping into the Olympic Training Center
• Leaving everything familiar to start a life in Girona, Spain
• Having their first daughter there, and sending Christian to the Tour two days later
• What it really means to be married to a pro athlete without losing yourself
• Watching their daughters grow up around cyclists, commentators, and “uncles” from all over the world

Takeaways and Talking Points

Love in Real Life
How you stay connected when one partner is gone most of the year and the other is carrying the everyday load.

Identity Beyond the Jersey
Why both people need dreams, not just the one in the spotlight.

Risk, Regret, and Saying Yes
Choosing a sport, choosing a move, choosing each other, and learning which risks are worth it.

Parenting on Two Continents
Raising kids across time zones and race seasons, and what the girls actually remember.

Life After Racing
Retiring from pro sport, trying on new careers, and finding a new rhythm with NBC, Peloton, and a vintage ice cream truck.

Things We’re Learning (and Unlearning)

• A big life doesn’t require a big ego.
• Supporting someone else’s dream shouldn’t erase your own.
• Home is built through habits, not geography.
• The small things hold everything together.
• The real endurance work is choosing each other again and again.

A Few Numbers

• Most pro cycling careers last under 10 years. Christian raced for 17.
• The Vande Veldes have lived in multiple states and countries, yet talk about Boulder and Girona like old friends.

This episode is not a highlight reel.
It’s a look underneath the race coverage and into a marriage built on honesty, resilience, humor, and a lot of showing up.

Thanks for listening,
Justin & Sarah

#RunningAhrens #VandeVelde #CyclingLife #TourDeFrance #ProAthleteLife #MarriageAndFamily #ParentingTeenagers #LifeAfterSport #PartnershipInMotion #EntrepreneurLife #WorkingParents #LoveAndGrit #RealConversations #NBCSports #PelotonCommunity #GreenvilleSC #StorytellingPodcast #RelationshipsMatter #BehindTheScenes #ShowUpForEachOther