エピソード

  • 402. Unrealistic Expectations in Relationships: Why You Can’t See Yours (and What to Do Instead)

    402. Unrealistic Expectations in Relationships: Why You Can’t See Yours (and What to Do Instead)
    2026/10/12
    If you’ve ever been disappointed or frustrated in a relationship, your expectations were too high. Think about it. Disappointment is what happens when you expect one thing and get another. Your own expectations don’t seem unrealistic to you, even though they often are, because you’re usually not aware you even have them. Most of them started out as preferences, you know, the way you like things done. But then, somewhere along the way, they turned into “shoulds” that are just facts everyone is supposed to follow. Today you’ll learn why you don’t realize you’re setting expectations for other people, what happens when a preference turns into a “should,” and three steps to turn your expectations back into preferences you can ask for, let go of, or get met somewhere else.____________________________✨ Full blog: https://abbymedcalf.com/unrealistic-expectations-in-relationships✨ Free Download: Take the Find Your Stealth Expectations Assessment - https://abbymedcalf.com/stealth-expectations-assessment✨ Get my new book now available on Amazon, Stop Reacting, Start Connecting: No Couples Therapy Required: https://abbymedcalf.com/stop-reacting-book✨ Check out Cure Hydration and use my code RME for a great deal: https://www.curehydration.com✨ Join my online community, One Love Collective, on Substack: https://abbymedcalf.com/substackYou'll get...✨ Early drops + ad-free podcast episodes✨ Worksheets, journal prompts, downloads, and guided visualizations✨ Community chats and live Q&A calls with Abby_________👉 Subscribe to the Love Letter and get my little messages each week! https://abbymedcalf.com/loveletter-opt-in/ 👉 Pick up a copy of my new book, Boundaries Made Easy: Your Roadmap to Connection, Ease and Joy: https://abbymedcalf.com/boundaries👉 Pick up The Workbook: Boundaries Made Easier to use as a companion to the book or as a standalone masterclass: https://abbymedcalf.com/boundaries-workbook👉 Buy my #1 bestselling book on Amazon, Be Happily Married: Even If Your Partner Won’t Do a Thing: https://abbymedcalf.com/book ____________________________Looking for past episodes of the Relationships Made Easy Podcast? Head over to https://abbymedcalf.com/podcast-the-archives where you’ll find past episodes.Ready to dig deeper? Take one of my online courses (some are FREE!) or grab a workbook: https://abbymedcalf.com/resourcesSay hello on social:Substack: https://substack.com/@abbymedcalfphdInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/abbymedcalfthrivingLinkedIn: https://linkedin.com/in/abbymedcalfthrivingTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@abbymedcalfphd YouTube: https://abbymedcalf.com/youtubeOur Sponsors:* Check out Cure Hydration and use my code RME for a great deal: https://www.curehydration.com* Check out Quince and use my code RME for a great deal: https://www.quince.comAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
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    52 分
  • 401. Triggered or Just Upset? How to Tell (And What to Do When Someone Says "I'm Triggered")

    401. Triggered or Just Upset? How to Tell (And What to Do When Someone Says "I'm Triggered")
    2026/10/05
    It seems like triggers are everywhere these days. Last week at my local coffee shop, I heard someone say they were triggered because they were out of the kind of tea they liked to drink. Maybe someone in your life says “I’m triggered” in the middle of an argument, and you have to stop the conversation even though you think they’re using it as a weapon. Or maybe you feel what you consider to be a true trigger when someone confronts you and your mind goes blank, and you feel numb. When is trigger the right word for what happened? Today you’re getting the real definition of a trigger, what to do if a real trigger comes up in conversation, and how to (finally) resolve communication issues when someone says they’re triggered.____________________________Full blog and show notes: https://abbymedcalf.com/triggered-or-uncomfortableGet the download - Real Trigger or Discomfort? A Quick Quiz to Find Out What’s Actually Happening: https://abbymedcalf.com/trigger-quiz✨ Get my new book now available on Amazon, Stop Reacting, Start Connecting: No Couples Therapy Required: https://abbymedcalf.com/stop-reacting-book✨ Check out Cure Hydration and use my code RME for a great deal: https://www.curehydration.com✨ Join my online community, One Love Collective, on Substack: https://abbymedcalf.com/substack.You'll get...✨ Early drops + ad-free podcast episodes✨ Worksheets, journal prompts, downloads, and guided visualizations✨ Community chats and live Q&A calls with Abby_________👉 Subscribe to the Love Letter and get my little messages each week! https://abbymedcalf.com/loveletter-opt-in/ 👉 Pick up a copy of my new book, Boundaries Made Easy: Your Roadmap to Connection, Ease and Joy: https://abbymedcalf.com/boundaries👉 Pick up The Workbook: Boundaries Made Easier to use as a companion to the book or as a standalone masterclass: https://abbymedcalf.com/boundaries-workbook 👉 Buy my #1 bestselling book on Amazon, Be Happily Married: Even If Your Partner Won’t Do a Thing: https://abbymedcalf.com/book ____________________________Looking for past episodes of the Relationships Made Easy Podcast? Head over to https://abbymedcalf.com/podcast-the-archives where you’ll find past episodes.Ready to dig deeper? Take one of my online courses (some are FREE!) or grab a workbook: https://abbymedcalf.com/resources Say hello on social:Substack: https://substack.com/@abbymedcalfphdInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/abbymedcalfthrivingLinkedIn: https://linkedin.com/in/abbymedcalfthrivingTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@abbymedcalfphd YouTube: https://abbymedcalf.com/youtubeOur Sponsors:* Check out Cure Hydration and use my code RME for a great deal: https://www.curehydration.com* Check out Quince and use my code RME for a great deal: https://www.quince.comAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
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    44 分
  • 400. Can One Person Really Change a Relationship? Here's What the Research Says

    400. Can One Person Really Change a Relationship? Here's What the Research Says
    2026/09/28

    You've been waiting for someone else to change first - your partner, your mother, your business partner, whoever it is - because you think the relationship can't change until they do something different. Today you're going to learn why that wait was never necessary. One person, on their own, is enough to change the whole relationship.

    ____________________________

    Full blog and show notes: https://abbymedcalf.com/one-person-change-relationship-reactive-loop

    Get the assessment: What’s Triggering You? A quick assessment to find your biggest trigger: https://abbymedcalf.com/whats-triggering-you

    Join my online community, One Love Collective, on Substack: https://abbymedcalf.com/substack.

    You'll get...

    ✨ Early drops + ad-free podcast episodes

    ✨ Worksheets, journal prompts, downloads, and guided visualizations

    ✨ Community chats and live Q&A calls with Abby

    _________

    👉 Subscribe to the Love Letter and get my little messages each week!

    https://abbymedcalf.com/loveletter-opt-in/

    👉 Pick up a copy of my new book, Boundaries Made Easy: Your Roadmap to Connection, Ease and Joy: https://abbymedcalf.com/boundaries

    👉 Pick up The Workbook: Boundaries Made Easier to use as a companion to the book or as a standalone masterclass: https://abbymedcalf.com/boundaries-workbook

    👉 Buy my #1 bestselling book on Amazon, Be Happily Married: Even If Your Partner Won’t Do a Thing: https://abbymedcalf.com/book

    ____________________________

    Looking for past episodes of the Relationships Made Easy Podcast? Head over to https://abbymedcalf.com/podcast-the-archives where you’ll find past episodes.

    Ready to dig deeper? Take one of my online courses (some are FREE!) or grab a workbook: https://abbymedcalf.com/resources

    Say hello on social:

    Substack: https://substack.com/@abbymedcalfphd

    Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/abbymedcalfthriving

    LinkedIn: https://linkedin.com/in/abbymedcalfthriving

    TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@abbymedcalfphd

    YouTube: https://abbymedcalf.com/youtube



    Our Sponsors:
    * Check out Quince and use my code RME for a great deal: https://www.quince.com


    Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

    Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
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    40 分
  • 399. Why You Self-Sabotage When Things Are Finally Going Well

    399. Why You Self-Sabotage When Things Are Finally Going Well
    2026/09/21

    You finally get the good thing: the relationship that's steady, the promotion, the friendship that's truly reciprocal, and right when it's working, you pick a fight, or pull back, or suddenly find something wrong that wasn't there last week. There are two very specific reasons you self-sabotage when things are finally going well, and today you'll learn both, plus effective tools so you can stop self-sabotaging and start enjoying your life.

    ____________________________

    Full blog and show notes: https://abbymedcalf.com/why-you-self-sabotage-when-things-are-good

    Take the assessment: Are You Self-Handicapping or Self-Verifying? A 2-Minute Check-In if You’re Self-Sabotaging When Things are Good: https://abbymedcalf.com/self-sabotage

    Join my online community, One Love Collective, on Substack: https://abbymedcalf.com/substack.

    You'll get...

    ✨ Early drops + ad-free podcast episodes

    ✨ Worksheets, journal prompts, downloads, and guided visualizations

    ✨ Community chats and live Q&A calls with Abby

    _________

    👉 Subscribe to the Love Letter and get my little messages each week! https://abbymedcalf.com/loveletter-opt-in/

    👉 Pick up a copy of my new book, Boundaries Made Easy: Your Roadmap to Connection, Ease and Joy: https://abbymedcalf.com/boundaries

    👉 Pick up The Workbook: Boundaries Made Easier to use as a companion to the book or as a standalone masterclass: https://abbymedcalf.com/boundaries-workbook

    👉 Buy my #1 bestselling book on Amazon, Be Happily Married: Even If Your Partner Won’t Do a Thing: https://abbymedcalf.com/book

    ____________________________

    Looking for past episodes of the Relationships Made Easy Podcast? Head over to https://abbymedcalf.com/podcast-the-archives where you’ll find past episodes.

    Ready to dig deeper? Take one of my online courses (some are FREE!) or grab a workbook: https://abbymedcalf.com/resources

    Say hello on social:

    Substack: https://substack.com/@abbymedcalfphd

    Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/abbymedcalfthriving

    LinkedIn: https://linkedin.com/in/abbymedcalfthriving

    TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@abbymedcalfphd

    YouTube: https://abbymedcalf.com/youtube



    Our Sponsors:
    * Check out Cure Hydration and use my code RME for a great deal: https://www.curehydration.com
    * Check out Quince and use my code RME for a great deal: https://www.quince.com


    Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

    Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
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    36 分
  • 398. Why Your Conversations Keep Going in Circles (And the 2-Step Fix)

    398. Why Your Conversations Keep Going in Circles (And the 2-Step Fix)
    2026/09/14
    You’re stuck in an argument. Maybe it’s the same fight you have every few weeks. Maybe it’s a standoff where nobody budges. Maybe someone goes quiet and passive-aggressive instead of saying what’s wrong. All three have the same root cause. You’re arguing the facts, and no one’s talking about what’s happening underneath the words. Whatever’s happening emotionally is what’s keeping the conversation stuck. You’re arguing the facts, hoping that’ll help, but it doesn’t because you’re focusing on the wrong thing. We connect through feelings, not thoughts, and until someone names the feelings, the facts just keep circling. Today I’m giving you my two-step process to shift this dynamic, so you can start connecting instead of going around in circles.____________________________Full blog and show notes: https://abbymedcalf.com/conversations-going-in-circles-same-fightGet The Circle-Breaker Script Sheet: What to Say When a Conversation Won’t Move Forward: https://abbymedcalf.com/circle-breaker-script Join my online community, One Love Collective, on Substack: https://abbymedcalf.com/substackYou'll get...✨ Early drops + ad-free podcast episodes✨ Worksheets, journal prompts, downloads, and guided visualizations✨ Community chats and live Q&A calls with Abby_________👉 Subscribe to the Love Letter and get my little messages each week! https://abbymedcalf.com/loveletter-opt-in/ 👉 Pick up a copy of my new book, Boundaries Made Easy: Your Roadmap to Connection, Ease and Joy: https://abbymedcalf.com/boundaries👉 Pick up The Workbook: Boundaries Made Easier to use as a companion to the book or as a standalone masterclass: https://abbymedcalf.com/boundaries-workbook👉 Buy my #1 bestselling book on Amazon, Be Happily Married: Even If Your Partner Won’t Do a Thing: https://abbymedcalf.com/book ____________________________Looking for past episodes of the Relationships Made Easy Podcast? Head over to https://abbymedcalf.com/podcast-the-archives where you’ll find past episodes.Ready to dig deeper? Take one of my online courses (some are FREE!) or grab a workbook: https://abbymedcalf.com/resourcesSay hello on social:Substack: https://substack.com/@abbymedcalfphdInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/abbymedcalfthrivingLinkedIn: https://linkedin.com/in/abbymedcalfthrivingTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@abbymedcalfphd YouTube: https://abbymedcalf.com/youtubeOur Sponsors:* Check out Cure Hydration and use my code RME for a great deal: https://www.curehydration.com* Check out Quince and use my code RME for a great deal: https://www.quince.comAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
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    39 分
  • 397. Whose Voice Is Your Inner Critic, Really?

    397. Whose Voice Is Your Inner Critic, Really?
    2026/09/07

    Your inner critic isn't really your voice. Research says that voice almost always started out as someone else's, usually a parent or caregiver from way back. The problem is you've been repeating it in your own head for so long you forgot it was someone else's way of thinking and not your own. It's time to choose what you say to yourself, so today I'm going to help you figure out who you are underneath that voice and my two-step process for getting it to stop running the show.

    ____________________________

    Full blog and show notes: https://abbymedcalf.com/whose-voice-is-your-inner-critic

    Get a 2-Step Tool for Quieting Your Inner Critic: https://abbymedcalf.com/quieting-inner-critic

    Join my online community, One Love Collective, on Substack: https://abbymedcalf.com/substack

    You'll get...

    ✨ Early drops + ad-free podcast episodes

    ✨ Worksheets, journal prompts, downloads, and guided visualizations

    ✨ Community chats and live Q&A calls with Abby

    _________

    Subscribe to the Love Letter and get my little messages each week! https://abbymedcalf.com/loveletter-opt-in/

    👉 Pick up a copy of my new book, Boundaries Made Easy: Your Roadmap to Connection, Ease and Joy: https://abbymedcalf.com/boundaries

    👉 Pick up The Workbook: Boundaries Made Easier to use as a companion to the book or as a standalone masterclass: https://abbymedcalf.com/boundaries-workbook

    👉 Buy my #1 bestselling book on Amazon, Be Happily Married: Even If Your Partner Won’t Do a Thing: https://abbymedcalf.com/book

    ____________________________

    Looking for past episodes of the Relationships Made Easy Podcast? Head over to https://abbymedcalf.com/podcast-the-archives where you’ll find past episodes.

    Ready to dig deeper? Take one of my online courses (some are FREE!) or grab a workbook: https://abbymedcalf.com/resources

    Say hello on social:

    Substack: https://substack.com/@abbymedcalfphd

    Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/abbymedcalfthriving

    LinkedIn: https://linkedin.com/in/abbymedcalfthriving

    TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@abbymedcalfphd

    YouTube: https://abbymedcalf.com/youtube



    Our Sponsors:
    * Check out Cure Hydration and use my code RME for a great deal: https://www.curehydration.com
    * Check out Quince and use my code RME for a great deal: https://www.quince.com


    Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

    Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
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    45 分
  • 396. The Mental Load: Why Helping Doesn’t Help

    396. The Mental Load: Why Helping Doesn’t Help
    2026/08/31

    You’re supposed to be sleeping, but what you’re doing is lying there in the dark thinking about all the things. Why did I say that stupid thing in the meeting today? Is that chicken still good or does it have to get cooked tomorrow? Did the permission slip get signed for the field trip? And crap, I forgot to call mom back!

    That’s the mental load, and it’s why you’re so tired. This isn’t about better sleep or having more downtime. It’s about the things you don’t realize you’re carrying. Today you’re going to learn what mental load really is, why it doesn’t get one bit lighter when somebody offers to help, and five things you can do about it.

    ____________________________

    Full blog and show notes: https://abbymedcalf.com/what-is-the-mental-load

    Free Download: Get the Mental Load Inventory: https://abbymedcalf.com/mental-load-inventory

    Join my online community, One Love Collective, on Substack: https://abbymedcalf.com/substack

    You'll get...

    ✨ Early drops + ad-free podcast episodes

    ✨ Worksheets, journal prompts, downloads, and guided visualizations

    ✨ Community chats and live Q&A calls with Abby

    _________

    Subscribe to the Love Letter and get my little messages each week!

    https://abbymedcalf.com/loveletter-opt-in/

    👉 Pick up a copy of my new book, Boundaries Made Easy: Your Roadmap to Connection, Ease and Joy: https://abbymedcalf.com/boundaries

    👉 Pick up The Workbook: Boundaries Made Easier to use as a companion to the book or as a standalone masterclass: https://abbymedcalf.com/boundaries-workbook

    👉 Buy my #1 bestselling book on Amazon, Be Happily Married: Even If Your Partner Won’t Do a Thing: https://abbymedcalf.com/book

    ____________________________

    Looking for past episodes of the Relationships Made Easy Podcast? Head over to https://abbymedcalf.com/podcast-the-archives where you’ll find past episodes.

    Ready to dig deeper? Take one of my online courses (some are FREE!) or grab a workbook: https://abbymedcalf.com/resources

    Say hello on social:

    Substack: https://substack.com/@abbymedcalfphd

    Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/abbymedcalfthriving

    LinkedIn: https://linkedin.com/in/abbymedcalfthriving

    TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@abbymedcalfphd

    YouTube: https://abbymedcalf.com/youtube



    Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

    Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
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    47 分
  • 395. Hero, Scapegoat, Lost Child or Mascot: Which One Were You?

    395. Hero, Scapegoat, Lost Child or Mascot: Which One Were You?
    2026/08/24

    Which family role were you given? Dr. Abby Medcalf on the hero, scapegoat, lost child and mascot, what the research shows, and how to stop playing yours.

    ____________________________

    Full blog and show notes: https://abbymedcalf.com/family-roles-hero-scapegoat-lost-child-mascot

    Which Role Are You Still Playing? Take the Quiz! https://abbymedcalf.com/which-role-are-you-still-playing

    Join my online community, One Love Collective, on Substack: https://abbymedcalf.com/substack.

    You'll get...

    ✨ Early drops + ad-free podcast episodes

    ✨ Worksheets, journal prompts, downloads, and guided visualizations

    ✨ Community chats and live Q&A calls with Abby

    _________

    Subscribe to the Love Letter and get my little messages each week!

    https://abbymedcalf.com/loveletter-opt-in/

    👉 Pick up a copy of my new book, Boundaries Made Easy: Your Roadmap to Connection, Ease and Joy: https://abbymedcalf.com/boundaries

    👉 Pick up The Workbook: Boundaries Made Easier to use as a companion to the book or as a standalone masterclass: https://abbymedcalf.com/boundaries-workbook

    👉 Buy my #1 bestselling book on Amazon, Be Happily Married: Even If Your Partner Won’t Do a Thing: https://abbymedcalf.com/book

    ____________________________

    Looking for past episodes of the Relationships Made Easy Podcast? Head over to https://abbymedcalf.com/podcast-the-archives where you’ll find past episodes.

    Ready to dig deeper? Take one of my online courses (some are FREE!) or grab a workbook: https://abbymedcalf.com/resources


    Say hello on social:

    Substack: https://substack.com/@abbymedcalfphd

    Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/abbymedcalfthriving

    LinkedIn: https://linkedin.com/in/abbymedcalfthriving

    TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@abbymedcalfphd

    YouTube: https://abbymedcalf.com/youtube



    Our Sponsors:
    * Check out Cure Hydration and use my code RME for a great deal: https://www.curehydration.com
    * Check out Quince and use my code RME for a great deal: https://www.quince.com


    Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

    Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
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    49 分