ABOUT THE EPISODE

In this episode, Alveena reflects on the true story of The Boy Who Was Raised as a Dog by Dr. Bruce Perry and the powerful lesson it carries about how our environment shapes the brain.

Through the story of a neglected child who learned to heal through love, presence, and stability, Alveena explores how trauma can be reversed when safety and care are reintroduced. She connects these insights to psychology, faith, and parenting, showing how our surroundings influence not just who we become but how our brains develop.

This episode is for anyone interested in psychology and trauma, faith and healing, or understanding how emotional environments shape mental health and relationships.

KEY TAKEAWAYS

• Healing starts with environment; safety, consistency, and presence allow the brain to rewire.
  
  
• Relational poverty is a lack of stable love and connection, not a lack of material comfort.
  
  
• Children learn emotional regulation by being in calm, consistent environments, not through rules.
  
  
• Emotional regulation begins with the parent; the tone of the home sets the foundation for growth.
  
  
• Small shifts like setting boundaries or changing your space can start emotional healing.
  
  
• Love and predictability are medicine for the nervous system.

BEST MOMENTS

"Doctor Perry didn’t see a broken brain. He saw a neglected one."

"A child can grow up in a mansion and still be relationally starved if they don’t experience consistent love, presence, or emotional regulation."

"You don’t teach emotional regulation. You create the conditions where regulation is possible."

"Children don’t need fixing. It’s the environment that needs to change."

"Trauma can be reversed. Brains can rewire. Love, safety, and predictable routines are medicine."

LINKS

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/alveena-salim-a98abb49/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/withalveena/

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@withAlveena

ABOUT THE HOST

Alveena is a psychology MSc student, writer, and seeker exploring the intersection of mental health, psychology, and Islamic spirituality.

Her work blends academic insight with lived experience, drawing from her background in teaching, therapy, and faith to explore identity, belonging, and healing.

Through her writing and podcast, she shares deeply personal reflections that bridge science and spirituality, encouraging honest self inquiry and wholehearted living.

Grounded yet introspective, Alveena invites others to slow down, reflect, and reconnect with who they truly are.

Thank you for listening. If something in an episode touched you, made you think, or just hit different… I’d love to hear it. Alveena

ABOUT THE EPISODE

In this episode, Alveena unpacks the psychology of echoism, the tendency to shrink, stay quiet, and put others’ needs above your own.

She shares her experiences growing up between cultures, learning to make herself smaller to avoid judgment or conflict, and how that pattern showed up later in adult life. Through psychology, faith, and personal reflection, she explores how saying “I’m fine” when you’re not can slowly erase your voice and identity.

This episode is for anyone who struggles with people pleasing, setting boundaries, or finding their voice after years of silence.

KEY TAKEAWAYS

• Echoism is the opposite of narcissism; it’s when you erase your own needs to avoid being a burden.
  
  
• Shrinking yourself to keep the peace isn’t humility, it’s self abandonment.
  
  
• Our worth is inherent and doesn’t depend on being small or silent.
  
  
• Healing echoism means recognising when you say “it’s fine” just to stay comfortable.
  
  
• Speaking your truth doesn’t make you unkind, it makes you whole.
  
  
• The Echo Breaker Framework helps you break the pattern by noticing, saying, and standing in your truth.

BEST MOMENTS

"I felt like I was failing at being a good Pakistani, but at the same time I didn’t quite fit into the Western world either."

"It wasn’t the henna I was ashamed of. It was myself, imagining how everyone else saw me."

"When narcissists centre their needs at the cost of others, echoists erase theirs completely."

"Shrinking yourself doesn’t make you virtuous. Honouring your voice is part of your spiritual dignity."

"You don’t have to change yourself to fit what everyone expects. You’re already enough."

LINKS

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/alveena-salim-a98abb49/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/withalveena/

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@withAlveena

ABOUT THE HOST

Alveena is a psychology MSc student, writer, and seeker exploring the intersection of mental health, psychology, and Islamic spirituality.

Her work blends academic insight with lived experience, drawing from her background in teaching, therapy, and faith to explore identity, belonging, and healing.

Through her writing and podcast, she shares deeply personal reflections that bridge science and spirituality, encouraging honest self inquiry and wholehearted living.

Grounded yet introspective, Alveena invites others to slow down, reflect, and reconnect with who they truly are.

Thank you for listening. If something in an episode touched you, made you think, or just hit different… I’d love to hear it. Alveena

ABOUT THE EPISODE

In this episode, Alveena explores how the way we love is shaped long before we realise it. From childhood moments of comfort and conflict to how we connect in adulthood, she unpacks attachment theory and its impact on our relationships, resilience, and faith.

Through psychology, faith, and personal reflection, she explains how early experiences with caregivers teach us lessons about love, safety, and belonging that echo throughout our adult lives.

This episode is for anyone interested in attachment theory, emotional healing, or understanding how early experiences shape the way we give and receive love.

KEY TAKEAWAYS

• Attachment develops through small daily interactions, not major moments.
  
  
• Early experiences shape how we give and receive love as adults.
  
  
• Secure attachment leads to emotional balance, resilience, and openness.
  
  
• Insecure attachment can create anxiety, avoidance, or self-protection.
  
  
• Healing begins with awareness of the patterns we inherited.
  
  
• Our relationship with God often mirrors how we first learned to experience love and safety.

BEST MOMENTS

"I learned to keep my feelings to myself, to write in my diary, and to cry in secret."

"Attachment develops gradually through thousands of tiny interactions in the early years."

"Being anxious or avoidant doesn’t mean you failed. It means you learned to survive."

"Children learn about God’s mercy through how their parents show mercy to them."

"Those moments that shaped us don’t have to define who we become."

LINKS

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/alveena-salim-a98abb49/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/withalveena/

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@withAlveena

ABOUT THE HOST

Alveena is a psychology MSc student, writer, and seeker exploring the intersection of mental health, psychology, and Islamic spirituality.

Her work blends academic insight with lived experience, drawing from her background in teaching, therapy, and faith to explore identity, belonging, and healing.

Through her writing and podcast, she shares deeply personal reflections that bridge science and spirituality, encouraging honest self inquiry and wholehearted living.

Grounded yet introspective, Alveena invites others to slow down, reflect, and reconnect with who they truly are.

Thank you for listening. If something in an episode touched you, made you think, or just hit different… I’d love to hear it. Alveena

ABOUT THE EPISODE

In this episode, Alveena opens up about growing up wishing she was white and the long journey toward self acceptance. She reflects on identity, belonging, and how cultural expectations can quietly shape who we become.

Through honest storytelling and psychological insight, she explores self discrepancy theory and the tension between who we are, who we wish to be, and who we think we should be. Alveena blends ideas from psychology, mental health, and Islamic spirituality to show how self awareness and faith can help us bridge those internal gaps and start living more authentically.

This episode is a powerful listen for anyone interested in faith and identity, mental health podcasts, or healing through faith and psychology.

KEY TAKEAWAYS

• Self discrepancy theory explains the emotional gap between our actual, ideal, and ought selves.
  
  
• When those selves clash, it creates inner tension that can lead to guilt, burnout, or perfectionism.
  
  
• Wholehearted living means accepting your current self as worthy instead of chasing an ideal version.
  
  
• Belonging starts within, moving or changing environments won’t fix internal disconnection.
  
  
• Faith and spirituality can become tools for self compassion when rooted in sincerity, not performance.
  
  
• Healing often begins when you reconcile your real self with the version of you that once hid to fit in.
  
  

BEST MOMENTS

“For a long time I wished I was white, just because being white seemed easier.”

“The gap between who I was and who I wished I could be is what psychologists call the self discrepancy theory.”

“Wholehearted living means I’m worthy now, not when I lose weight, not when I pray more, not when I look like my friends.”

“Authenticity is the daily practice of letting go of who we think we’re supposed to be and embracing who we are.”

“The freedom I’m giving my children to be themselves is the same freedom I’m learning to give to myself.”

LINKS

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/alveena-salim-a98abb49/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/withalveena/

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@withAlveena

ABOUT THE HOST

Alveena is a psychology MSc student, writer, and seeker exploring the intersection of mental health, psychology, and Islamic spirituality.

Her work blends academic insight with lived experience, drawing from her background in teaching, therapy, and faith to explore identity, belonging, and healing.

Through her writing and podcast, she shares deeply personal reflections that bridge science and spirituality, encouraging honest self inquiry and wholehearted living.

Grounded yet introspective, Alveena invites others to slow down, reflect, and reconnect with who they truly are.

Thank you for listening. If something in an episode touched you, made you think, or just hit different… I’d love to hear it. Alveena