For twenty years I was sure success had a price, and the price was me. More hours, more strain, more proof that I was serious. Then one conversation asked me what success actually was — and how it made me feel and the answer fell apart in my hands.

This episode is about the moment a belief stops looking like a fact and starts looking like a decision you can revisit. I walk through the Experiment Cycle — Notice → Flip → Run → Read — the loop I used to test the rule I'd never questioned, and what changed over the year after I stopped forcing. The point was never doing less. It was living closer to what's actually true for me instead of a formula I inherited by default.

Helpful Links:

The Great Life Experiment
You built the life. You hit the goals. But the pressure, overthinking, and old patterns still keep showing up. The Great Life Experiment is a free 30-day challenge with one question a day to help you uncover the unconscious patterns underneath it all.

Take the FREE quiz here: Pressure Pattern Profile Quiz

Chapters:

00:00 The price I paid for twenty years

00:48 The formula you never chose

01:33 Looking busy vs. being productive

03:41 The Experiment Cycle: Notice → Flip → Run → Read

04:20 A belief is a decision, not a fact

05:50 Writing the new belief and stacking evidence

07:54 Picking the opposite on purpose

10:10 The campaign and the farm: proof it was easy

12:30 What happened when I ran the experiment

14:48 Six trips, an empowered team, double the revenue

17:24 Alignment over escape

19:47 The one belief to question this week

Connect with Joey on your favourite social platforms!

Joey Vaillancourt (Real Influence website)

Instagram

Facebook

LinkedIn

YouTube

Enhance your mental clarity, focus, and brain wellness with NeuroVizr—get 10% off with code JOEYV.

Transform your meditation and boost sleep, creativity, and focus with Sens.ai—save $100 with code REALINFLUENCE.

About:

Joey Vaillancourt is the host of Real Influence, a show for high performers who can't turn it off. If you've built the life, hit the goals, and still feel the pressure, this is for you. Joey helps entrepreneurs and executives rewire the unconscious patterns driving the need to force, fix, and prove, so they can achieve more by leading with presence instead of pressure.

There's a point where personal development stops helping and starts keeping you stuck.

In this episode, Joey opens up about a pattern he's seen in himself over the past year: the urge to find one more coach, one more breakthrough, one more framework, one more answer. On the surface, it looks like growth. But underneath, it can become something else entirely — avoidance.

If you've been stuck in self improvement, overthinking your next move, consuming more than you're creating, or feeling burned out by how much "work" you've already done on yourself, this episode is for you.

You'll learn:

• Why self help addiction can feel productive while quietly keeping you stuck

• The difference between pain vs suffering — and how we create extra suffering by revisiting old stories

• How coaching addiction and constant learning can become procrastination through learning

• Why there's a point where you don't need more insight — you need reps

• How to tell when you actually need support… and when you just need to take action

Helpful Links:

The Great Life Experiment
You built the life. You hit the goals. But the pressure, overthinking, and old patterns still keep showing up. The Great Life Experiment is a free 30-day challenge with one question a day to help you uncover the unconscious patterns underneath it all.

Take the FREE quiz here: Pressure Pattern Profile Quiz

Chapters:

00:00 The trap of always needing "more"

00:39 When personal development becomes addiction

01:48 Pain vs suffering

02:25 The validation loop behind coaching addiction

03:05 Why I thought I needed another mentor

04:17 The question that stopped me from hiring another coach

05:07 Alignment vs fear

06:06 Choosing a coach whose life you actually want

06:59 The next offer… and the same hesitation

08:53 Breakthroughs, blind spots, and reopening old stories

10:53 Why talking about old problems can keep them alive

12:17 You don't need to fix every area right now

13:22 Taking action vs learning more

14:28 The hamster wheel of self improvement

15:23 What you probably need now is reps

Connect with Joey on your favourite social platforms!

Joey Vaillancourt (Real Influence website)

Instagram

Facebook

LinkedIn

YouTube

Enhance your mental clarity, focus, and brain wellness with NeuroVizr—get 10% off with code JOEYV.

Transform your meditation and boost sleep, creativity, and focus with Sens.ai—save $100 with code REALINFLUENCE.

About:

Joey Vaillancourt is the host of Real Influence, a show for high performers who can't turn it off. If you've built the life, hit the goals, and still feel the pressure, this is for you. Joey helps entrepreneurs and executives rewire the unconscious patterns driving the need to force, fix, and prove, so they can achieve more by leading with presence instead of pressure.

Most people don't wait until the end of life to discover what's important.

They simply wait too long to act on what they've known all along.

Inspired by Bronnie Ware's The Five Regrets of the Dying, this episode explores the hidden pattern behind the most common life regrets and why so many ambitious people unknowingly build lives around expectations instead of intention.

If you've been caught in hustle culture, constantly postponing happiness until the next milestone, this episode offers a different perspective.

Rather than blowing up your life, Joey explains how small shifts in awareness can help you reconnect with what actually matters.

• The real meaning behind the five deathbed regrets

• Why high performers are especially vulnerable to burnout

• How societal expectations quietly shape our decisions

• Why authentic living begins with better questions

• Reflection exercises to help you start course correcting today

00:00 The Question Successful People Avoid

00:42 The Five Regrets of the Dying

02:06 One Pattern Behind Every Regret

03:14 Why This Book Changed My Life

05:28 The Five Deathbed Regrets

07:38 Whose Life Are You Living?

09:52 The "Later" That Never Comes

11:18 Borrow the Clarity Now

12:15 Course Correct Without Starting Over

13:49 Awareness Is the Beginning

15:02 Final Reflections

Connect with Joey on your favourite social platforms!

https://joeyvaillancourt.com/

https://www.instagram.com/joeyvaillancourt/

https://www.facebook.com/joey.vaillancourt.9/

https://www.linkedin.com/in/joey-vaillancourt/

https://www.youtube.com/@joeyvaillancourt-realinfluence

https://joeyvaillancourt.com/the-30-day-challenge/

Enhance your mental clarity, focus, and brain wellness with NeuroVizr—get 10% off with code JOEYV. https://neurovizr.com/?ref=rirxqhll

Transform your meditation and boost sleep, creativity, and focus with Sens.ai—save $100 with code REALINFLUENCE.
https://sens.ai/realinfluence

About:

Joey Vaillancourt is the host of Real Influence — a show for high performers who can't turn it off. If you've built the life, hit the goals, and still feel the pressure — this is for you. Joey helps entrepreneurs and executives rewire the unconscious patterns driving the need to force, fix, and prove, so they can achieve more by leading with presence instead of pressure.