120: 4/8, Ali Katz Married Herself: Why We Should Stop Waiting to be Chosen; How to Design a Relationship That Works Series

Andrea sits down with Ali Katz — entrepreneur, community builder, mother, and self-marriage pioneer — to explore her journey of box-checking success, internal disconnection, discovery of the warring selves within and the need for identity death before birthing a new soul. If you're waiting for the one, if you're healing from heartbreak, if you're seeking belonging without self-abandonment, or if you're looking to dismantle the traditional relationship script, this is for you. You'll hear:

-How Ali fell in love with who she is

-All about her proposal, ring, vows and Costa Rica wedding

-Why magic rituals (and a Ketubah!) create reality

-Why we need not WAIT to be chosen

-How she built internal safety instead of outsourcing

-All about an ayahuasca journey vision

-Her mid-life shift from the beaches of LA to the fields of Boulder

-How self-devotion prevents future partner resentment

Find Ali's wedding online (!!!) at www.thealikatz.com/marry-yourself

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We're Andrea and Janelle--two midlife mavericks sharing openly about our own experiences--messy AF and no regrets----with marriage, divorce, polyamory and pleasure.

You'll hear from relationship experts, meet real life Bravehearts and get intimacy skills.

Truth: When we're brave enough to ask for what we want, honor our boundaries and have the hard conversations--with partners, friends, family and, most importantly, ourselves--magic happens and happiness ensues.

If you're seeking permission to create a new map for relationships and want to feel less alone along the way, we got you.

With glitter and radical acceptance,
Janelle & Andrea.

Follow, subscribe and share!Learn more about us at: https://www.permissiontobehuman.live/

Music: "Running Wild" by LVDY
https://www.lvdymusic.com/

119: Part 3/8: Monogamous, Sleeping Apart & Growing Together: How to Design a Relationship that Works Series

Twenty-four years, one marriage, separate bedrooms, and zero regrets—meet Jonathan and Angela, the monogamous couple proving that "traditional" doesn't have to mean boring AF. From their "let's put all cards on the table" first date where they basically arranged their own marriage, to their eight-month pandemic deep-dive that finally let them fine-tune 19 years of functional-but-not-optimized coupledom, these two are rewriting the relationship rulebook one shower date at a time. The secret sauce? Radical independence with devotion, love languages as tacos (yes, really), and understanding that intimacy isn't just about sex—it's about being each other's biggest cheerleader while also knowing when to meow it out and go to your separate corners. Spoiler: sleeping apart might actually save your relationship, and you don't need grand gestures when Post-it notes and offering a water bottle speak volumes in the right love language. You'll hear:

-How they created their own 'arranged' marriage on the first date

-Separate bedrooms = less resentment = relationship gold

-Why re-learning the 5 Love languages as tacos changed everything

-"What makes the whole work" beats "what makes me happy right now"

-Why little things beat the grand gestures

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We're Andrea and Janelle--two midlife mavericks sharing openly about our own experiences--messy AF and no regrets----with marriage, divorce, polyamory and pleasure.

You'll hear from relationship experts, meet real life Bravehearts and get intimacy skills.

Truth: When we're brave enough to ask for what we want, honor our boundaries and have the hard conversations--with partners, friends, family and, most importantly, ourselves--magic happens and happiness ensues.

If you're seeking permission to create a new map for relationships and want to feel less alone along the way, we got you.

With glitter and radical acceptance,
Janelle & Andrea.

Follow, subscribe and share!Learn more about us at: https://www.permissiontobehuman.live/

Music: "Running Wild" by LVDY
https://www.lvdymusic.com/

118: Ep 2/8, Andrea & Kevin's Blueprint for Modern Love: Saturday CheckIns are So Hot Right Now! : How To Design a Relationship That Works Series

Hey Bravehearts, curious how to start a romantic relationship at 50? After divorce, polyamory, therapy, personal growth and years of unlearning cultural BS, Andrea and Kevin share the actual tools, conversations, rituals, and agreements they use to create emotional safety, embodied intimacy, a sense of freedom and a relationship that doesn't require self-abandonment. This is about two grown humans stay AWAKE and choosing each other from a place of wholeness. There's a nod to Susan Cain's "Quiet", Betty Martin's "The Art of Receiving and Giving", Jack Morin's "The Erotic Mind", Attachment Theory, Brené Brown and Esther Perel. You'll hear:

-Why five weeks of Zoom calls set a beautiful stage for a first date

-About Saturday check-ins, eye-gazing and a suggestion box (Yes!)

-About a mealtime prayer is better than a gratitude journal

-How wrestling and rough-housing is part of their intimacy

-Why catching tension early is the secret to a beautiful relationship

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We're Andrea and Janelle--two midlife mavericks sharing openly about our own experiences--messy AF and no regrets----with marriage, divorce, polyamory and pleasure.

You'll hear from relationship experts, meet real life Bravehearts and get intimacy skills.

Truth: When we're brave enough to ask for what we want, honor our boundaries and have the hard conversations--with partners, friends, family and, most importantly, ourselves--magic happens and happiness ensues.

If you're seeking permission to create a new map for relationships and want to feel less alone along the way, we got you.

With glitter and radical acceptance,
Janelle & Andrea.

Follow, subscribe and share!Learn more about us at: https://www.permissiontobehuman.live/

Music: "Running Wild" by LVDY
https://www.lvdymusic.com/

117: Part 1/8: Janelle's Evolution from Catholic Monogamy to Solo Poly, D/s and Unicorn: How To Design a Relationship That Works Series

Holy shit, are you ready to have your relationship rulebook completely obliterated? In this season six premiere, Janelle pulls back the curtain on her unconventional love life that includes being solo poly, in a DOM/sub container, a unicorn, AND a comet relationship. From scheduled sex to sleeping solo to discovering she's actually happiest as the "second woman," Janelle's journey from Catholic-raised monogamy to radical self-permission is proof that designing your own relationship format isn't just possible—it's fucking liberating. This isn't about advocating for any particular setup; it's about giving yourself permission to unlearn everything you were taught and discover where you actually thrive. Spoiler alert: it might look nothing like what you imagined, and that's exactly the point. For more relationship format ideas, Janelle recommends Designer Relationships, by Mark Michaels and Patricia Johnson. You'll hear:

-What enmeshment means and why it pertains to solo poly

-Unicorns are real… Janelle is a living example

-Scheduled sex > spontaneous sex

-How off-duty nights could save marriages

-When jealousy was Janelle's gateway drug to truth

Learn more about Janelle at feelwildlyalive.com

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We're Andrea and Janelle--two midlife mavericks sharing openly about our own experiences--messy AF and no regrets----with marriage, divorce, polyamory and pleasure.

You'll hear from relationship experts, meet real life Bravehearts and get intimacy skills.

Truth: When we're brave enough to ask for what we want, honor our boundaries and have the hard conversations--with partners, friends, family and, most importantly, ourselves--magic happens and happiness ensues.

If you're seeking permission to create a new map for relationships and want to feel less alone along the way, we got you.

With glitter and radical acceptance,
Janelle & Andrea.

Follow, subscribe and share!Learn more about us at: https://www.permissiontobehuman.live/

Music: "Running Wild" by LVDY
https://www.lvdymusic.com/

Season 6 Announcement!!!

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We're Andrea and Janelle--two midlife mavericks sharing openly about our own experiences--messy AF and no regrets----with marriage, divorce, polyamory and pleasure.

You'll hear from relationship experts, meet real life Bravehearts and get intimacy skills.

Truth: When we're brave enough to ask for what we want, honor our boundaries and have the hard conversations--with partners, friends, family and, most importantly, ourselves--magic happens and happiness ensues.

If you're seeking permission to create a new map for relationships and want to feel less alone along the way, we got you.

With glitter and radical acceptance,
Janelle & Andrea.

Follow, subscribe and share!Learn more about us at: https://www.permissiontobehuman.live/

Music: "Running Wild" by LVDY
https://www.lvdymusic.com/

116: Janelle and Her Dad's Journey into a Death Portal... and Came Out Thriving!

Honey, buckle up. This isn't your typical "aww, aging parent" story. This episode is a wild ride through the liminal space between worlds, where Janelle's 95-year-old dad Jack decided to take the scenic route through death's waiting room—and then said "nah, I'm good" and came back thriving.

What started as Uncle Jim's passing turned into a 12-day hospital odyssey that had Janelle saying goodbye to her father approximately 47 times (okay, maybe not that many, but who's counting when you're in a death portal?). Between the delirium, the catatonic states, the Catholic prayers, and her dad confessing to crimes that never happened, Janelle got the spiritual initiation she didn't know she signed up for. Along with a nod to Atul Gawande's book, Being Mortal, you'll hear:

-Three different states of consciousness (delirious, catatonic, and normal—dad was really showing range)

-Medical fraud confessions that weren't actually confessions

-A divine denial from rehab that turned out to be the best thing ever

-Christmas miracles involving stairs and walkers

-The realization that your desires and everyone else's are part of the same cosmic fabric

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We're Andrea and Janelle--two midlife mavericks sharing openly about our own experiences--messy AF and no regrets----with marriage, divorce, polyamory and pleasure.

You'll hear from relationship experts, meet real life Bravehearts and get intimacy skills.

Truth: When we're brave enough to ask for what we want, honor our boundaries and have the hard conversations--with partners, friends, family and, most importantly, ourselves--magic happens and happiness ensues.

If you're seeking permission to create a new map for relationships and want to feel less alone along the way, we got you.

With glitter and radical acceptance,
Janelle & Andrea.

Follow, subscribe and share!Learn more about us at: https://www.permissiontobehuman.live/

Music: "Running Wild" by LVDY
https://www.lvdymusic.com/

115: Andrea's Update: Letting Go, Falling In Love, and Realizing the Answer Is Not in Your Phone

What if everything you thought defined you… dissolved? Your marriage. Your business. Your income. Your identity. And instead of panicking — you felt more alive? In this raw, funny, deeply human episode, Andrea talks about what happens after you burn the old blueprint to the ground--at age 50! This is less about "how to glow up" and more about how to let go without losing your soul. You'll hear:

-How her new partnership makes no time for TV or phones

-Why she wants to go sell books or bake bread now

-How she feels less anxious and more ALIVE….with LESS money

-How your flaws might be mismatches instead of defects

-Why being busy is not the same as being alive

=Her confront mass consumption head on

-Hidden writer-grief about the reality of AI

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We're Andrea and Janelle--two midlife mavericks sharing openly about our own experiences--messy AF and no regrets----with marriage, divorce, polyamory and pleasure.

You'll hear from relationship experts, meet real life Bravehearts and get intimacy skills.

Truth: When we're brave enough to ask for what we want, honor our boundaries and have the hard conversations--with partners, friends, family and, most importantly, ourselves--magic happens and happiness ensues.

If you're seeking permission to create a new map for relationships and want to feel less alone along the way, we got you.

With glitter and radical acceptance,
Janelle & Andrea.

Follow, subscribe and share!Learn more about us at: https://www.permissiontobehuman.live/

Music: "Running Wild" by LVDY
https://www.lvdymusic.com/

114: Janelle's Update: "It's selfish if I don't ask for my desires."

Janelle shares personal updates and insights on her lift at the moment; she discusses her new living arrangements and the impact of her housemate, Arianna, on her creative expression. She discusses the significance of homeopathy and her experiences with ancestral connections during Samhain. The conversation also touches on grief, family dynamics, and the importance of asking for help in pursuing one's desires. Shout outs to John Wolfsone, Dãmsa Germiane and Sophie Howell. You'll hear:

-How Janelle sees people as keys that unlock parts of her

-The magic of homeopathy as a vibrational approach to healing

-Why remembering our ancestors can help us feel more stable

-How everyone is connected to her desire to go to New Zealand

-Language shapes our reality and can influence our outcomes

Learn more about Janelle at feelwildlyalive.com

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We're Andrea and Janelle--two midlife mavericks sharing openly about our own experiences--messy AF and no regrets----with marriage, divorce, polyamory and pleasure.

You'll hear from relationship experts, meet real life Bravehearts and get intimacy skills.

Truth: When we're brave enough to ask for what we want, honor our boundaries and have the hard conversations--with partners, friends, family and, most importantly, ourselves--magic happens and happiness ensues.

If you're seeking permission to create a new map for relationships and want to feel less alone along the way, we got you.

With glitter and radical acceptance,
Janelle & Andrea.

Follow, subscribe and share!Learn more about us at: https://www.permissiontobehuman.live/

Music: "Running Wild" by LVDY
https://www.lvdymusic.com/