Part 2: when grief won't leave your body, what to do| Dr. Niloufer Merchant, Gina Kiem, Helen Bass
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Part 2: when grief won't leave your body, what to do| Dr. Niloufer Merchant, Gina Kiem, Helen Bass
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hey girlies! This episode is part 2 of "why women of color carry stress differently". We talk about "how to get better" after discussing nervous system healing from part 1 = nervous system + healing + community vibes 💭
Dr. Niloufer Merchant, Gina Kim, and Helen Bass break down Nervous System Regulation (Polyvagal Theory) in real life—especially for women of color.
They talk morning routines, ancestral roots, and how grief/loss hits your body, not just your mind.Big themes:
* healing isn’t solo—it’s community + family
* grief stays, but you can still stay connected
* therapy isn’t just “fixing problems,” it’s understanding your storyThey also get into:* generational trauma + ancestral wisdom
* why healing takes time (no quick fixes fr)
* trust, safety, and nervous system awareness in therapy
* co-regulation = healing through real human connectionBasically: slow healing, deep roots, and learning your nervous system is key
🔑Links/Books Mentioned:
Dr. Stephen Porges: https://www.stephenporges.com/
Deb Dana Website: https://www.rhythmofregulation.com/about
Dr. Niloufer Merchant: https://www.nmmerchant.com/
Gina Kiem: https://ginakiem-goldcounsel.com/
Helen Bass Website: https://www.sincerepractice.com/
Meaning of Your Life Book: https://www.amazon.com/Meaning-Your-Life-Finding-Emptiness/dp/0593545427
Chapters
00:00 Introduction and Morning Reflections
03:03 Polyvagal Theory in Daily Life
06:01 Honoring Our Ancestors
08:45 The Importance of Family and Ancestral Connections
11:53 Understanding Loss and Its Impact on the Nervous System
14:58 Navigating Grief and Connection
18:09 The Role of Community in Healing
29:52 Navigating Loss and Connection
36:04 The Role of Nervous System in Therapy
49:16 Problem Solving in Therapy
54:14 Healing from Family Trauma
57:28 Understanding the Nervous System and Individual Profiles
58:20 The Slow Process of Healing and Understanding Trauma
01:00:13 Intergenerational Trauma and Its Impact
01:02:11 The Importance of Relationship in Therapy
01:04:52 Navigating Client Relationships and Trust
01:06:12 The Role of Patience in Therapy
01:09:36 Co-Regulation and Therapist's Own Nervous System
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