Top Stories of the Week

• Joyce Makes A Choice
• Niqab-solutely Not Helping
• Fraudshore Processing
• Inferno of Neglect

Quote of the Week

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If you want News Weakly to keep punching the news in the headlines weakly, keep it independent by joining the Patreon at patreon.com/samishah. You get bonus content, discounts for live shows, and the warm glow of knowing your money is not being laundered through a dodgy island nation. As far as you know.

Sami Shah is a multi-award-winning comedian, writer, journalist, and broadcaster.

For more: http://thesamishah.com

Theme music "Historic Anticipation" by Paul Mottram

This podcast is written, hosted, and produced by Sami Shah.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“That is not peace, that is a diet war.”

News Weakly is kept independent and listener funded, thanks to the generosity of paid supporters on Patreon. Join at patreon.com/samishah to keep the show going and to access bonus content, early episodes, and other perks.

Sami Shah is a multi-award-winning comedian, writer, journalist, and broadcaster.

For more: http://thesamishah.com

Theme music ‘Historic Anticipation’ by Paul Mottram

This podcast is written, hosted, and produced by Sami Shah.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

A special commemoration of my 20 years in standup comedy. Bit of a weird episode this one! Hope you enjoy it!

Keep News Weakly independent, and fuelled by sarcasm!

Join the Patreon at patreon.com/samishah.

Sami Shah is a multi-award-winning comedian, writer, journalist, and broadcaster.

For more: http://thesamishah.com

Theme music ‘Historic Anticipation’ by Paul Mottram

This podcast is written, hosted, and produced by Sami Shah.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

NEWS WEAKLY 185 — 8th November 2025

One Dick Less in the World!

Don’t Mess with the Zohran!

Platforms of Our Discontent!

Streaming the Nation!

Keep News Weakly independent, and fuelled by sarcasm!

Join the Patreon at patreon.com/samishah.

Sami Shah is a multi-award-winning comedian, writer, journalist, and broadcaster.

For more: http://thesamishah.com

Theme music ‘Historic Anticipation’ by Paul Mottram

This podcast is written, hosted, and produced by Sami Shah.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

I’m doing a one-night-only 20th anniversary stand-up show:

You'd Think After 20 Years I'd Be Better At This

13 Nov, 6:30pm — Comedy Republic (Melbourne)

Tickets via comedyrepublic.com.au.

The Artist Formerly Known as Prince Andrew

Ceasefire Withdrawal Symptoms Erupt

Sudan’ed If You Do, Sudan’ed If You Don’t

You Can’t Spell Sussan Without SS

Babies, Barnaby & Bullshit

If you want to support News Weakly, join the Patreon at patreon.com/samishah. You’ll get bonus content, early releases, and the smug satisfaction of knowing your money isn’t going to Barnaby Joyce’s bar tab.

Sami Shah is a multi-award-winning comedian, writer, journalist, and broadcaster.

For more: http://thesamishah.com

Theme music ‘Historic Anticipation’ by Paul Mottram

This podcast is written, hosted, and produced by Sami Shah.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We’re on baby watch at News Weakly HQ! Two weeks off incoming—don’t unsubscribe! I’ll be back once I’ve defeated a boss-level nappy.

Also: I’m doing a one-night-only 20th anniversary stand-up show:

You'd Think After 20 Years I'd Be Better At This

13 Nov, 6:30pm — Comedy Republic (Melbourne)

Patreon members get a discount code (see the pinned post at patreon.com/samishah). Otherwise, tickets via comedyrepublic.com.au.

• Ceasedfire, News Now…
• Israel and Hamas sign onto Phase One of “The Comprehensive End to the Gaza War”: hostages (living and deceased) returned, prisoner releases, and an IDF pullback to the “yellow line.” Trump promises a pyramid-side signing ceremony, because of course he does. Netanyahhu’s far-right partners rage; Gaza readies aid corridors; everyone reads the fine print with a magnifying glass and a migraine.
• “A Piece Prize”
• Nobel Peace Prize goes to Venezuelan democrat María Corina Machado. The Trump White House responds with “politics over peace” energy; Trump congratulates Machado while implying the medal would look better on his mantelpiece.
• The Ballad of David Pocock
• Kicked out (then re-invited) to the Australian Parliament Sports Club after asking why a gambling lobby is a sponsor. PM—who’s listed as club president—says everyone should be welcome. Pocock’s holding out for transparency; Canberra discovers “conflict of interest” isn’t just a footy penalty.
• Brides, Bombs & Bureaucracy
• “ISIS brides” and children returned to Australia without formal repatriation—Home Affairs knew for months; two children granted citizenship by descent. Government says “we didn’t help,” which is interesting given how many forms got stamped. Opposition reaches for the Temporary Exclusion Orders talking point; AFP preps for more “self-managed returns.”
• Artificial (and Financial) Intelligence
• Deloitte refunds part of a $440k report after AI-generated howlers (fake cases, phantom sources). Senate calls it a “human intelligence problem”; consultants reassure us they’d never, ever do that (again).
• French Kisses Goodbye
• France clocks five prime ministers in two years. Latest: Sébastien Lecornu quits 14 hours after launching his cabinet. Macron’s minority arithmetic meets Parisian patience: both collapse spectacularly.
• No Wi-Fi, No Worries
• Taliban filters throttle social media in Afghanistan; videos stop loading, women lose a key lifeline. It’s the world’s harshest digital detox: great for screen-time stats, catastrophic for rights.

“Peace isn’t a miracle, it’s a temporary pause between tragedies.”

• Keep News Weakly healthy: patreon.com/samishah
• One-night-only stand-up special (13 Nov): comedyrepublic.com.au
• Share the episode, leave a review, and tell a friend who argues in comment sections for sport.

Sami Shah is a multi-award-winning comedian, writer, journalist, and broadcaster.

For more: http://thesamishah.com

Theme music “Historic Anticipation” by Paul Mottram

This podcast is written, hosted, and produced by Sami Shah.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Two years after October 7th, the world still argues in absolutes.

Pro-Israel voices call it a war for survival.

Pro-Palestine voices call it resistance against colonialism.

And somewhere between the slogans and the hashtags, the dead keep multiplying.

In this News Weakly special, Sami Shah steps back from the noise and looks at the long view — drawing lessons from the Thirty Years’ War, Northern Ireland, and moments of fragile hope in Israeli and Palestinian history.

From Westphalia to Belfast, from Gaza to Melbourne, this episode explores what centuries of conflict teach us about exhaustion, reconciliation, and how peace survives when certainty doesn’t.

• The Thirty Years’ War — how Europe learned that faith without restraint leads to ruin
• The Troubles — how Ireland turned fatigue into peace
• The Children of October 7 — what two years of war are teaching a new generation
• Australia’s role — how to keep our empathy from collapsing into imported hate
• Glimpses of the impossible — moments when Israelis and Palestinians found shared humanity against the odds
• 
  

Help keep News Weakly independent and ad-free by joining at

👉 patreon.com/samishah

Sami Shah is a multi-award-winning comedian, writer, journalist, and broadcaster.

For more: thesamishah.com

Theme music ‘Historic Anticipation’ by Paul Mottram

This podcast is written, hosted, and produced by Sami Shah.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hi everyone, This year marks my twenty years in comedy, and to celebrate I’m doing a one-off, one-time-only anniversary comedy show called:

You'd Think After 20 Years I'd Be Better At This

13th November, 6:30pm

Comedy Republic Theatre, Melbourne

It’s twenty years of stand-up crammed into one night—a greatest hits, a worst-of, and some brand new material, all about surviving two decades of comedy, hecklers, pandemics, marriages, divorces, and jokes that should have stayed in the notebook.

Tickets are just $25. But if you’re a member at patreon.com/samishah, you’ll get a special discount code, plus that smug glow of knowing you’re keeping this podcast alive and healthy!

• In Manchester, a synagogue attack on Yom Kippur leaves two dead and reignites debates about solidarity, antisemitism, and the perils of bad baby naming.
• Donald Trump’s Gaza ceasefire plan turns out to be less peace deal, more investor pitch, complete with a “Board of Peace” chaired by Tony Blair.
• At Quantico, Trump and Pete Hegseth summon America’s generals for a loyalty test that felt alarmingly like Saddam-lite stagecraft.
• Greta Thunberg is detained after joining a flotilla trying to break the Gaza blockade, proving she’s still willing to put her boat where her mouth is.
• Saudi Arabia launches the Riyadh Comedy Festival, featuring world-class comedians and world-class hypocrisy.
• In Australia, Optus blames “human error” for a 000 outage while its parent company Singtel keeps racking up billions without paying tax.
• 
  

Quote of the Week:

“When a government points a broad sword inward, it can’t help but cut too deep."

Support the Show

Want to enjoy News Weakly ad-free? Head over to patreon.com/samishah. Your support keeps the podcast alive, independent, and fuelled by sarcasm.

Credits

Sami Shah is a multi-award-winning comedian, writer, journalist, and broadcaster.

For more: http://thesamishah.com

Theme music Historic Anticipation by Paul Mottram.

This podcast is written, hosted, and produced by Sami Shah.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.