There’s a particular kind of fall that happens after we’ve tried to be the perfect parent - not just good, but better than what we had growing up; more conscious, more patient, more healed. And when we inevitably hit our edge, it doesn’t just feel like a bad moment… it feels like a collapse of identity. This episode unpacks how that spiral is not a sign you’re failing, but a direct consequence of the pedestal you’ve placed on who you think you need to be…and how softening the fantasy is what actually frees you from the shame loop.

In this episode we discuss:
- how you didn’t just become a parent… you stepped into a version of yourself you’d been rehearsing for years
the “perfect parent” as a fantasy built from everything you didn’t get, and everything you swore you’d be
- why the higher the pedestal, the harder the fall: pride into guilt, control into collapse
- the moment you hear your parent come out of your mouth… and the shame lands hard and fast
- how the spiral isn’t because you’re failing…it’s because the standard was never human to begin with
- the quiet compensation of “I’ll be perfect somewhere else” when you can’t feel it here
- why trying to pull yourself out of the spiral keeps you stuck… instead of questioning the fantasy that created it
- what it actually looks like to equalise the high: bringing the “perfect parent” back into something real, messy, and sustainable

Want support on this journey? Come join us inside Honey Club - where we melt these blocks together, one breath, one practice, one deep remembering at a time. Find out more at julietenner.love or visit: https://julie-tenner.newzenler.com/courses/honeyclub


Reach out to Bridget for 1:1 coaching - bridgetwood.life