Ever wonder if marriage is supposed to feel this hard? You're not alone. After 32 years together (soon to be 33), we've discovered there truly is a "sweet spot" in marriage – but it took us nearly a decade of challenges to find it.

Marriage often disappoints when measured against the polished images we see in media. It's like those commercials showing perfect burgers with cheese cascading down the sides – the real thing rarely matches up to the hype. This disconnect leads many couples, even Christian ones, to question their choice of partner or whether marriage is worth the effort.

The breakthrough came when we stopped focusing on what we weren't getting and started focusing on what we could give. During prayer, instead of presenting God with a list of my husband's failings, I received conviction about my own behavior. The instruction was clear: "Stop worrying about what he's not doing and do what I told you to do." This shift from selfishness to sacrifice transformed our relationship, though not overnight.

Most couples want instant results, abandoning good practices when they don't see immediate transformation. Real change requires consistent effort over time – "plowing in hope" as Scripture describes it. The sweet spot we now enjoy includes deep friendship, mutual enjoyment, shared vision, and the satisfaction of building a legacy together. We've moved beyond competing to truly functioning as a team.

If you're struggling in your marriage, take heart. Listen to your spouse, pray for guidance about your own behavior rather than focusing on their shortcomings, and commit to consistent obedience to biblical principles. The sweet spot exists, and we'd love to help you find it. Join us on Patreon for live Q&A sessions where we'll answer your specific questions and help you navigate your unique challenges.

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