How to Rewire Your Mindset & Choose Happiness (Even When Life Gets Messy) | Frank Clayton

Season 2, Episode 1 (Episode 53)

Welcome back to Life Beyond B.S.! In this episode, host Heather McNally sits down with Frank Clayton. Frank is a licensed mental health counselor, speaker, and author known as "The Happiest Therapist."

Together, we dive deep into the real science of happiness, post-traumatic growth, and how to break free from childhood patterns and limiting beliefs. Frank shares his powerful journey growing up with trauma and how reframing his past transformed his life and work.

We discuss why happiness isn't about ignoring life’s hard moments, how to rebuild true self-esteem using the "tug-of-war" model, and simple ways to start choosing joy today.

If you enjoyed this episode, please Like, Comment, Subscribe/Follow, and Share it with someone who needs to hear this message today!

TIMESTAMPS

00:00 - Welcome to Life Beyond B.S. & Introducing Frank Clayton

02:50 - "Who are you at a soul level?" (Evolving Beyond What You Do)

05:40 - Overcoming Childhood Trauma & Finding Healing

14:40 - The Shift: Post-Traumatic Growth vs. PTSD

20:30 - How to Reframe Your Story & Stop Being the Victim

24:30 - Awareness, Acknowledgment & Choice: Reclaiming Your Control

32:00 - What is "Feeling Time"? (Why Hard Emotions Matter)

39:00 - The Science of Happiness: The 50/10/40 Rule

47:00 - The Tug-of-War of Self-Esteem: Thoughts, Beliefs & Behaviors

53:00 - Self-Compassion & Building a Bridge to Better Beliefs

58:30 - Teaching Resilience & Optimism to Children

01:04:30 - What Living a "Life Beyond B.S." Really Means

CONNECT WITH FRANK CLAYTON

• Website: https://positive.kids

• Explore Frank’s books & positive psychology resources for adults and kids!

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheHappiestCounselor/

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@YourHappyTherapist

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/yourhappytherapist__/

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@the.happiest.therapist

CONNECT WITH HEATHER MCNALLY

• Website: https://heathermcnally.com

• Work with Heather: Explore coaching, podcasts, and upcoming events at https://heathermcnally.com

• Follow Life Beyond B.S. for weekly episodes on breaking free from societal expectations and living authentically!

One year. 52 episodes. Ten years without my mom. And one date that connects it all.

On October 13, 2016, I lost my mom, Patricia "Pat" Rico. On October 13, 2025, I launched Life Beyond B.S. And no, choosing that date wasn't a coincidence.

Today, as I celebrate the one-year anniversary of Life Beyond B.S., I'm sharing the deeply personal story behind why this podcast exists, the woman who helped shape me, and how the last ten years have changed the way I see myself, love, grief, and life itself.

💜 A gentle heads-up: This episode is emotional and deeply personal. We talk openly about illness, caregiving, death, losing a parent, grief, and some difficult family experiences. There are tears, vulnerable moments, and honest conversations about things that aren't always easy to hear. Please take care of yourself as you listen.

But this isn't simply an episode about losing someone.

It's about the life they lived. The ordinary moments that become extraordinary memories. The complicated emotions that come with loving and caring for someone. And what happens when loss makes you question how you're living your own life.

It's also about finding your voice, learning to trust yourself, challenging limiting beliefs, and discovering that you don't have to wait until you're more confident, more prepared, or more anything to begin living fully.

When I launched this podcast a year ago, I had plenty of fears. I didn't know if I could do it, if anyone would listen, or whether I had what it took.

52 episodes later, I know something I didn't fully believe back then: I'm capable. My voice matters. And so does yours.

In this anniversary episode, I reflect on what my mom taught me through her life, what grief has taught me over the past decade, and what a year of honest, vulnerable conversations has taught me about connection, courage, authenticity, and becoming more fully myself.

And yes, there are some funny stories, too. Because my mom was so much more than the person I lost.

This is also why I do the work I do.

I know what it's like to live under the weight of limiting beliefs, expectations, self-doubt, and stories about who you're supposed to be. I also know what it's like to question those stories, reconnect with yourself, and discover a life that feels genuinely yours.

As a coach, I help women explore those patterns, reconnect with their own values and desires, build self-trust, and begin making choices that align with who they truly are.

If something in this conversation resonates with you, I'd love to connect. I offer a complimentary discovery conversation where we can talk about where you are, what you want for yourself, and whether working together might be a good fit.

🌐 Visit HeatherMcNally.com to connect and explore working together.

And to everyone who has listened, watched, shared an episode, joined me for a conversation, or trusted me with a piece of your story over this past year: thank you.

You helped turn an idea I'd carried for years into something real.

Here's to my mom. Here's to one year of Life Beyond B.S. And here's to another year of real conversations, deeper connections, and living fully, freely, and unapologetically.

💜 If this episode moves you, please like it, follow or subscribe to Life Beyond B.S., and share it with someone who might need this conversation. I'd also love to hear what you take away from it in the comments.

Life Beyond B.S. with Heather McNally

Real Conversations. Brighter Lives.

#LifeBeyondBS #HeatherMcNally #LifeAfterLoss #GriefAndHealing #SelfDiscovery #PersonalGrowth #AuthenticLiving #FindingYourVoice