Every child is an image bearer of a creative God, and discovering their unique gifts is one of the most rewarding parts of parenting. In this episode, hosts Andy and Kelly talk with Wade Pierce, Senior Director of Program at Eagle Ranch, about how to stop trying to control your kids' future and start becoming their greatest talent agent.

Wade, an adoptive and foster parent who has welcomed over 40 children into his home, shares hard-won lessons on recognizing a child's passions, the danger of parental anxiety, and why your only vision for your child should be a healthy relationship. He breaks down the Circle of Courage philosophy and explains why embracing your child's interests—no matter how intense or fleeting—is the key to fostering mastery and a sense of self-worth.

Episode Highlights

• [01:36] Wade shares his upbringing, his journey as an educator, and his experience as an adoptive and foster parent of over 40 children.
• [03:45] Wade explains the concept of the "baby hero" role and his personal experience with striving to please his parents.
• [10:10] The key to stewarding a child's life: becoming a detective or a talent agent to discover what makes them tick.
• [14:15] Wade introduces the Circle of Courage and the four things every child needs to thrive: belonging, mastery, independence, and generosity.
• [17:58] Why getting out of the mode of living vicariously through your children is crucial for their long-term success.
• [19:00] Examples of following and supporting a child's mastery, from fishing to buying and selling shoes.
• [25:50] How parental anxiety is the enemy and why becoming a non-anxious presence is the key to breaking cycles of control.

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Resources Mentioned

• Concept: Circle of Courage (from Reclaiming Youth International)
• Author: Dallas Willard

Do you really know what motivates your child, or are you projecting your own expectations onto them? In this insightful episode, hosts Andy and Kelly talk with Dr. Fred Haselden (Director of Education) and Jennifer Smith (Day School Program Counselor) about the critical difference between the gifts you want your child to have and the unique gifts God has actually given them.

They share core concepts from psychology, including how your child's nervous system is always choosing between connection and protection, and how to identify their personal triggers and currency. Dr. H candidly shares his "dentist retirement plan" story—a perfect, albeit intense, example of how parental expectations can overshadow a child's true interests.

Episode Highlights

• [05:12] Dr. H and Jennifer introduce themselves and share their personal family stories.
• [06:00] Dr. H shares his personal and humorous story of "brainwashing" his daughter into thinking she wanted to be a dentist and the powerful lesson he learned about controlling expectations.
• [11:30] Why many parents struggle with having preconceived notions and expectations for their kids.
• [12:30] Jennifer explains the difference between a child's nervous system being in protection mode versus connection mode.
• [16:00] Dr. H and Jennifer define and give examples of a child's trigger and their currency (what motivates them).
• [19:30] How to implement structured "rhythms of connection"—like a no-screens family dinner or the "Rosebud, Thorn" exercise—to build security.
• [25:50] A discussion of why building strong community is essential, especially for adoptive parents, when facing the challenge of a child's active rejection.
• [28:40] The wisdom of sowing good seeds and praying for the harvest, focusing on your efforts, not the outcome.

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Resources Mentioned

• Book: Kids with Big Baffling Behaviors by Robyn Gobbel

Community is a lifeline, especially when parenting gets hard. In this episode, co-host Andy Nelson gets vulnerable and shares his personal story of moving from a strong, stable community to a new city where he and his wife, Emily, felt isolated and alone.

Andy shares how this experience of being without a "safety net" forced them to intentionally build a new community and how this journey shaped their family's values. He also tells the powerful story of a season of hardship when their community stepped in to help, and how this act of being cared for redefined his understanding of what it means to both give and receive help.

Episode Highlights

• [01:30] Andy shares his background, growing up in a close-knit, loving community and family.
• [04:00] Andy's story of moving 600 miles away from home and the shock of finding himself without a community.
• [07:00] The pivotal moment when a small act of kindness helped transform their family's isolated season.
• [08:50] How Andy and Emily intentionally built a new community and how their different personalities contributed to that.
• [14:00] Why building a "deep" community is more important than having "thin" relationships.
• [21:10] The power of being a "helper" and how a season of needing help taught him to receive from others.
• [23:00] The profound impact of community on family health and well-being.

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Resources Mentioned

• Book: You Are What You Love by James K.A. Smith
• Non-profit: Promise 686