It Didn’t Look Like Abuse Until It Did, Domestic Violence, Coercive Control & Silent Manipulation with Leesa Scanlan - #79
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In this powerful and deeply important conversation, Jordan sits down with Leesa to discuss coercive control, emotional abuse, and the quiet forms of domestic violence that often go unnoticed even by the person experiencing them.
Domestic abuse isn’t always physical. Sometimes it looks like love, devotion, and protection until slowly, it becomes control, isolation, confusion, and fear.
Leesa shares her experience of recognising the signs, navigating denial, finding support, and rebuilding her sense of self. This episode shines a light on the subtle patterns of manipulation that can appear in relationships and empowers listeners with knowledge, tools, and hope.
If you're learning about coercive control for the first time, or suspect something feels “off” in a relationship this episode is a must-listen.
What We Cover-
What coercive control really looks like
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Emotional + psychological abuse signs most people miss
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How abuse can begin slowly and feel like love at first
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The key moments where Leesa realised something wasn’t right
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The role of social support, anonymous messages & online communities
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The internal conflict: “He was loving… and also controlling”
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Red flags including love-bombing, isolation, jealousy & pattern-based manipulation
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What helped Leesa break free and speak publicly
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How sharing her story created connection & healing
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Domestic Violence Disclosure Scheme (DVDS)
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Support systems available in Australia
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What to do if you're unsure whether it's abuse
💬 Abuse isn’t always loud sometimes it whispers 💭 Confusion, self-doubt, and guilt are signs of manipulation ❤️ Healthy love never isolates or controls 🧠 Naming the behaviour is the first step to healing 👭 You are not alone support exists and recovery is possible
Resources & SupportIf this episode brings up anything for you, please reach out for support:
Australia: 📞 1800 RESPECT — 1800 737 732 🌐 1800respect.org.au 📍 Domestic Violence Crisis Line (SA): 1800 800 098 👮 Domestic Violence Disclosure Scheme (SA) — check eligibility + info via SA Police 🏛️ DV leave & crisis payments info — Services Australia
Emergency: If you are in immediate danger, contact 000.
International:
Canada
📞 ShelterSafe / Assaulted Women’s Helpline — 1-866-863-0511 📱 Text #SAFE (#7233) on Rogers, Telus, Bell 🌐 sheltersafe.ca 📞 Domestic Violence Hotline (Canada-wide) — 1-800-363-9010
United Kingdom📞 National Domestic Abuse Helpline — 0808 2000 247 🌐 nationaldahelpline.org.uk 💬 Live chat & support options available
New Zealand📞 Shine Domestic Abuse Helpline — 0508 744 633 (0508 SHINE) 📞 Women’s Refuge Crisis Line — 0800 733 843 (0800 REFUGE) 🌐 womensrefuge.org.nz
Sponsors
This episode is brought to you by:
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Supporting brands that support the show helps keep these conversations going 💛
Listen, Share & ReviewIf this conversation resonated with you, please: ✔️ Share it with someone who might need it ✔️ Leave a rating and review ✔️ Tag us on Instagram with your thoughts
Your support helps spread awareness and may truly change or save someone’s life.
DisclaimerThis episode discusses domestic and emotional abuse. It is for education and support purposes only and is not a substitute for professional advice.