エピソード

  • I'm Gonna Beat Jesus

    I'm Gonna Beat Jesus
    2025/10/28

    You've seen it on TikTok: a wild theory connecting a sacred mountain in the Middle East, fallen angels, the Roswell crash, and the number 33. Welcome to the Mount Hermon conspiracy, the belief that a supernatural coordinate system, the 33rd parallel, serves as a global energy grid for aliens and angels alike. It’s a theory so powerful that it supposedly dictates everything from ancient history to modern warfare.

    So, is the Earth a giant D20 crisscrossed with energy lines? Scott and Tristan (armed with sangria and cream ale) dive into the numbers. They use some good old-fashioned math, statistical analysis, and a lesson on how latitude and longitude actually work to show why this "worldwide grid" has a tolerance for error so wide you could fly a V-2 rocket through it. Then, they get into the real history of Mount Hermon, a site sacred to countless cultures long before anyone wrote about "Watchers," and explore how apocalyptic literature from 200 BCE is being twisted to serve a new narrative.

    But this isn't just about debunking bad math. The hosts connect the dots from TikTok brainrot to the very real, very dangerous world of geopolitics, revealing how these conspiracies are weaponized to justify white nationalism and settler colonial projects in active war zones today.

    Stuff mentioned in the episode:

    • Monte Carlo Simulation
    • Sarah Davis Baker and her video "The uncanny horror of AI hallucinations"

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    Tristan Johnson Bluesky | Twitter | YouTube

    Scott Niswander Bluesky | Twitter | YouTube

    Follow the show on Bluesky or Twitter for more updates!


    Ask us questions and send us topics to talk about at ProbsNotAliens.com

    Music by Rod Kim | Cover art by Skutch

    See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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    1 時間 15 分
  • The Gospel According to the House Hippo

    The Gospel According to the House Hippo
    2025/10/14
    After an 11-month hiatus that felt like a biblical epoch, Tristan and Scott are back to ask the tough questions, like "Do you remember the name of our own podcast?" and "Do Christians actually believe in angels?". The answer, according to Ancient Aliens, is that they shouldn't because angels were actually extraterrestrial visitors misunderstood by primitive humans.Join us as we dive into the linguistic weeds, tracing words like the Hebrew malak and the Greek angelos to reveal how "messenger of God" got deliberately misinterpreted as "messenger from another planet". We'll explore similar divine go-betweens in Akkadian, Zoroastrian, and even Islamic traditions, all while trying to figure out how a Canadian PSA about a tiny, crumb-eating hippo is the key to media literacy. We connect the dots between cherry-picking ancient texts for aliens and the more sinister historical revisionism of the Lost Cause and Nazi archaeology because of course we do.Stuff mentioned in the epsiode:House Hippo PSA (Concerned Children's Advertisers)Ice Angel (2000)Assassin's Creed Isu loreMaimonides' Mishneh Torah (angel hierarchy)Michael (1996) - John Travolta filmAngels in the Outfield (1994)Draw with Jazza YouTube channelGet new episodes early and support the show on Patreon and Nebula!Subscribe to It's Probably (not) Aliens for weekly episodes about cool ancient history! And give us a 5-star review if you have the time. It really helps us out!Tristan Johnson Bluesky | Twitter | YouTubeScott Niswander Bluesky | Twitter | YouTubeFollow the show on Bluesky or Twitter for more updates!Ask us questions and send us topics to talk about at ProbsNotAliens.comMusic by Rod Kim | Cover art by SkutchSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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    1 時間 22 分
  • Dramatic_Fart.mp3

    Dramatic_Fart.mp3
    2025/10/07
    In April 2025, the James Webb Space Telescope made a groundbreaking discovery: a distant exoplanet, K2-18b, showed signs of dimethyl sulphide. A chemical that, on Earth, is only produced by life. The media went wild with the news that we had finally found a "fart planet," the first real biosignature of alien life. But then, as quickly as it appeared, the confidence began to fade.Join Tristan and Scott as they investigate what really happened with the planet of alien farts. First, they dive into the incredible science of how we study distant worlds, from the mind-bending coolness of transit spectroscopy to the statistical nitty-gritty of "three sigma" confidence. Then, they pull back the curtain on the systemic pressures that create these cycles of hype and retraction, exploring everything from the "publish or perish" culture in academia to the perverse incentives that cause university press offices to overstate research. This isn't just a story about a potential discovery; it's a crucial lesson in scientific literacy and a look at how the messy, brilliant, and deeply human process of science actually works.Stuff mentioned in the episode:K2-18bJames Webb Space Telescope (JWST)Cambridge University's original press release about the discoveryDimethyl sulfideThe MIRI (Mid-Infrared Instrument) on JWSTTransit spectroscopyThe COLd Scale (Confidence of Life Detection scale) from NASAPhosphine on Venus controversy'OumuamuaALH84001 (Martian meteorite)The Wow! SignalDrake EquationPathological scienceAndrew Wakefield vaccine studyPolywaterCold fusionN-rays (1903)Science communication outlets mentioned: The Conversation, Science X, Tech Explore, Medical Xpress, Phys.orgSodium vapor process (Mary Poppins special effects)Get new episodes early and support the show on Patreon and Nebula!Subscribe to It's Probably (not) Aliens for weekly episodes about cool ancient history! And give us a 5-star review if you have the time. It really helps us out!Tristan Johnson Bluesky | Twitter | YouTubeScott Niswander Bluesky | Twitter | YouTubeFollow the show on Bluesky or Twitter for more updates!Ask us questions and send us topics to talk about at ProbsNotAliens.comMusic by Rod Kim | Cover art by SkutchSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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    1 時間 41 分
  • Corrections: We Are The Liberal Joe Rogan Now

    Corrections: We Are The Liberal Joe Rogan Now
    2025/09/30
    To kick off the new season, Scott and Tristan uphold their sacred tradition: correcting all the things they've gotten wrong. What begins as a simple corrections episode quickly spirals into a sprawling conversation about the Canada-U.S. relationship, the strategic importance of maple syrup, and a revolutionary new food group known as "pickle fries." The hosts also tackle more serious topics, including a historical correction on the Trail of Tears, a powerful submission from a caregiver about the dangerous overlap between conspiracy theories and schizophrenia, and the Mormon belief in a holy city that was literally taken up into heaven. Also, they finally settle the score on the correct pronunciation of a certain Starbucks drink.Links to stuff Mentioned:Charlie Angus (Canadian politician mentioned)The Great Canadian Maple Syrup HeistAkira (anime film)Ghost in the ShellPatlabor 2Spriggan (Netflix anime)Mars Express (French animated film)Nathan For YouIWW (Industrial Workers of the World/Wobblies)The Long Walk of the NavajoTreaty of Guadalupe HidalgoGet new episodes early and support the show on Patreon and Nebula!Subscribe to It's Probably (not) Aliens for weekly episodes about cool ancient history! And give us a 5-star review if you have the time. It really helps us out!Tristan Johnson Bluesky | Twitter | YouTubeScott Niswander Bluesky | Twitter | YouTubeFollow the show on Bluesky or Twitter for more updates!Ask us questions and send us topics to talk about at ProbsNotAliens.comMusic by Rod Kim | Cover art by SkutchSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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    1 時間 2 分
  • The One Where We Finally Talk About Garrus

    The One Where We Finally Talk About Garrus
    2025/01/14

    Join Scott and Tristan for a chaotic post-season Q&A where they tackle everything from their favourite fictional aliens to conspiracy theories they almost believed. Get ready for tangents into video games, surprising revelations about research rabbit holes, and an unexpectedly passionate debate about the correct pronunciation of poutine. This episode features questions from our space potato supporters and includes multiple bits about Muppets because, apparently, that's where we're at now. Plus, there is the truth about why we disappeared for four months (spoiler: we just forgot to tell anyone we were taking a break).

    Get new episodes early and support the show on Patreon and Nebula!


    Subscribe to It's Probably (not) Aliens for weekly episodes about cool ancient history! And give us a 5-star review if you have the time. It really helps us out!


    Tristan Johnson Bluesky | Twitter | YouTube

    Scott Niswander Bluesky | Twitter | YouTube

    Follow the show on Bluesky or Twitter for more updates!


    Ask us questions and send us topics to talk about at ProbsNotAliens.com

    Music by Rod Kim | Cover art by Skutch

    See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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    1 時間 7 分
  • Montauk: The Conspiracy Theory That Inspired Better Fiction

    Montauk: The Conspiracy Theory That Inspired Better Fiction
    2025/01/07

    Let's explore the bizarre world of the Montauk Project, where recovered memories meet Cold War paranoia to create one of America's wildest conspiracy theories. We explore how a decommissioned military base somehow became ground zero for alleged government experiments in mind control, time travel, and alien contact. We'll examine their "recovered memories" spawned an entire conspiracy industry, and trace the project's influence on pop culture from The X-Men to Stranger Things. And for no reason a disturbing tangent about lab-grown brains that will haunt your dreams.

    Get new episodes early and support the show on Patreon and Nebula!


    Subscribe to It's Probably (not) Aliens for weekly episodes about cool ancient history! And give us a 5-star review if you have the time. It really helps us out!


    Tristan Johnson Bluesky | Twitter | YouTube

    Scott Niswander Bluesky | Twitter | YouTube

    Follow the show on Bluesky or Twitter for more updates!


    Ask us questions and send us topics to talk about at ProbsNotAliens.com

    Music by Rod Kim | Cover art by Skutch

    See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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    1 時間 22 分
  • The Great New Jersey Drone Panic of 2024

    The Great New Jersey Drone Panic of 2024
    2024/12/31

    In late 2024, New Jersey became the epicenter of a nationwide panic when mysterious large drones started appearing over military installations, power lines, and even Trump's golf course. From the Morris County sightings to the Coast Guard's encounter with a dozen coordinated drones, we dive into what's really happening, why everyone's freaking out, and how this fits into America's long history of technology panics. Plus, why you probably shouldn't shoot down any drones, even if they're really annoying you.


    Get new episodes early and support the show on Patreon and Nebula!


    Subscribe to It's Probably (not) Aliens for weekly episodes about cool ancient history! And give us a 5-star review if you have the time. It really helps us out!


    Tristan Johnson Bluesky | Twitter | YouTube

    Scott Niswander Bluesky | Twitter | YouTube

    Follow the show on Bluesky or Twitter for more updates!


    Ask us questions and send us topics to talk about at ProbsNotAliens.com

    Music by Rod Kim | Cover art by Skutch

    See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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    1 時間 28 分
  • Ancient Aliens Can't Melt Stone Beams

    Ancient Aliens Can't Melt Stone Beams
    2024/12/24

    Scott and Tristan melt down Ancient Aliens' claims about Scotland's mysterious vitrified forts. Through terrible Scottish accents and unexpected detours into modern battery technology, they explore how Iron Age Scots used sophisticated fire management techniques to create these unique structures - no alien death rays required. Learn why turning your fort's stones into glass might actually be a terrible defensive strategy, why Ancient Aliens should have watched Outlander for better research, and how climate change is threatening these fascinating historical sites. Features bonus content about cryogenically frozen corpses and why you shouldn't let ivy grow on your house.


    Get new episodes early and support the show on Patreon and Nebula!


    Subscribe to It's Probably (not) Aliens for weekly episodes about cool ancient history! And give us a 5-star review if you have the time. It really helps us out!


    Tristan Johnson Bluesky | Twitter | YouTube

    Scott Niswander Bluesky | Twitter | YouTube

    Follow the show on Bluesky or Twitter for more updates!


    Ask us questions and send us topics to talk about at ProbsNotAliens.com

    Music by Rod Kim | Cover art by Skutch

    See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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    48 分