Have you ever snapped at someone and then thought, who was that? Or found yourself wanting to change something about your life but unable to stop the very thing you want to stop? That gap, between what you want and what you do, is at the heart of what this episode explores.

In this episode, Wendy is joined by Tammy Sollenberger, certified IFS therapist, author of The One Inside: Thirty Days to Your Authentic Self and host of The One Inside podcast. Tammy has been practising for nearly 30 years and brings a rare warmth and clarity to explaining Internal Family Systems, a therapy model that is growing rapidly and earning its reputation for creating change that actually sticks.

IFS says we are not one single self. We are made up of many parts, some that manage and protect us, some that react when things get too much, and some that carry old wounds and beliefs we formed long ago. The model also says there is a calm, wise self at the centre of all of us that, with practice, can learn to listen to those parts with curiosity rather than trying to get rid of them. Including the ones we don't like.

The conversation covers how IFS differs from CBT, what "unblending" from a part actually means in practice, why the behaviours we most want to change are often the ones trying hardest to help us, and how Tammy uses the model on herself in real time, including when a client's experience triggered her own grief following her father's death.

There is also a genuinely funny thread throughout about book-buying parts, carrying books around without opening them, and the parts that absolutely believe buying more books will fix the problem.

Tammy's book The One Inside is available here:

👉 The One Inside: 30 Days To Your Authentic Self

Free meditations and resources, including a downloadable meditation, are at:

👉 https://tammysollenberger.com

To learn more about Wendy's work, explore resources, or stay up to date with future episodes, visit:

👉 12 Easy Steps to Overcome Stress, Anxiety & Overwhelm | Wendy Castelino

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