If you and your best friend had to start a cult... what would it look like?

That's the completely normal question Laura and Nate attempt to answer this week.

Together they design a religious climate-change cult, invent a wildly questionable business model involving Noah's Ark, discover why neither of them should ever be trusted with leadership, and accidentally say several things they'd rather law enforcement ignore.

Then, in an abrupt tonal shift that somehow makes perfect sense, they discuss what they'd choose for their last meal and learn that friendship can survive many things... except buying someone the wrong pork rinds or dunking wonder bread in Diet Coke.

If you've ever wondered how a conversation can go from divine lightning to Wonder Bread soaked in Diet Coke, welcome to Imparting Malarkey.

As always, no actual cults were formed during the recording of this episode... probably,

Episode 2: The Laura Conspiracy

What conspiracy theory do you secretly think might be true?

This week, Laura and Nate dive into everything from JFK and Marilyn Monroe to time travel, government cover-ups, and whether history has already been tampered with by future humans.

They also debut a brand-new segment, The Jar Jar Binks Of..., where they determine which pizza topping (or entire pizza style) is the most polarizing of the pizza world. (Listen as Laura forgets why they've started the segment)

And then things get weird.

Laura shares the ongoing saga of accidentally receiving emails intended for strangers who happen to share her name—including a scientist, a Texas online dater, a prolific shopper, and someone who may or may not become her future self. By the end of the episode, there's only one logical conclusion: maybe they're all the same Laura.

If you've ever gone down a conspiracy rabbit hole, argued over pizza toppings, or wondered if your alternate selves are living better lives than you are... this episode is for you.

Experts of Nothing. Still imparting malarkey.

Welcome to the very first episode of Imparting Malarkey!

In this inaugural episode, Laura and Nate introduce the podcast, explain how they landed on the name, and immediately prove they have no intention of staying on topic.

Along the way they debate:

• Which Avenger would be the best drinking buddy.
• Whether Bruce Banner is actually a terrible choice.
• How much money it would take to get into a stranger's van.
• The surprisingly questionable usefulness of being unbreakable.
• And why "a hill you'd die on" apparently means something very different to Nate.

If you've ever had a conversation that started in one place and ended somewhere completely unrecognizable, you'll fit right in.

Experts of Nothing. Professional wanderers of thought. Welcome to Imparting Malarkey.