I was in Saudi Arabia. Alone in an apartment. Far from everyone and everything that meant anything to me.

And God put me on my knees. Not dramatically. Not with thunder and lightning. Just — on my knees. With nothing.

No achievement to offer. No performance to present. Just me. On my knees. With nothing.

And God made one thing clear: There is nothing you can do to earn this. Nothing you need to do to earn this. You can only receive it.

Deuteronomy 9:6 — "The LORD your God is not giving you this good land because of your righteousness."

Not because of my righteousness. Not because I earned it. Because He chose to.

The boy in the boat who concluded he was replaceable — was told by God: I chose you.

The weight fell. All the trying was over. Accepted. Exactly as I was. No performance needed. No performance allowed.

Watch on YouTube:
https://youtube.com/shorts/7s1cusoNOWA?feature=share

Watch the full episode — I Couldn't Heal What I Didn't Understand.:
https://youtu.be/JTRGKb6KY6s

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TRANSCRIPT:

Hi, I'm Bill — and this is The Warrior Medic.
This week we've been talking about the conclusion.
Like The one a boy draws when the wound is installed.
Or the one that runs a man's life for forty years.
Today I want to tell you about the night that conclusion finally lost its power over me.
I was in Saudi Arabia. Alone in an apartment.
And God put me on my knees.
Not dramatically. Not with thunder and lightning.
Just — on my knees.
With nothing.
No achievement to offer.
No performance to present.
No record of indispensability to lay on the table.
Just me. On my knees. With nothing.
And in that moment — God made something clear.
There is nothing you can do to earn this.
… Nothing you need to do to earn this.
You can only receive it.
I thought of a verse I'd read.
Deuteronomy nine, verse six.
"Understand that the LORD your God is not giving you
this good land because of your righteousness —
for you are a stiff-necked people."
Not because of my righteousness.
Not because I earned it.
Not because I performed well enough.
But… Because He chose to.
The boy in the boat who concluded he was replaceable —
the man who spent forty years trying to prove otherwise —
was being told by God:
I chose you.
Not because of your righteousness.
But because I chose you.
Something happened in that moment
that forty years of achievement never produced.
The weight fell.
Not all at once. Not completely.
But something changed.
The knowledge — deep inside —
that all the trying was over.
That I was accepted. Exactly as I was.
No performance needed.
No performance allowed.
Just love Him.
That's all the earning I needed.
Worth can't be earned.
It can only be received.
And that night in Saudi Arabia —
I finally received it.
So, if you’re tired of working for the acceptance that never comes, and you’re tired of wondering why… Watch the full episode… episode 11 — the link is below.
And Tap the coin logo — that subscribes you to this channel.

My name is Bill — and this is The Warrior Medic.
No man left behind.

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