Dawn Friedman hosts the Tell Me It Will Be Okay podcast and interviews therapist and adult and child psychiatrist Dr. Elena Lister about her book Giving Hope: Conversations with Children about Illness, Death and Loss (co-written with Michael Schwartzman and Lindsay Tate). Lister explains that asking children about difficult subjects—including death and suicidal feelings—doesn’t “put ideas in their head,” but builds trust and opens communication, noting kids already think about these topics through experiences like Disney movies, nature, and news events. She emphasizes caregivers being grounded and “steady and sturdy,” using delaying or revisiting conversations when needed, admitting mistakes, and allowing children to set pace while keeping doors open. Lister shares her family’s experience when her daughter Liza was dying, discusses talking about uncertainty and differing beliefs about afterlife, offers guidance on cremation and funerals, and highlights that mentionable is manageable.

00:00 Welcome and Guest

02:55 Fear of Saying It

05:53 Disney and Death

07:42 Start Before Loss

10:50 Grounded Parent Mindset

12:43 Deer in Headlights

15:42 Good Enough Parenting

16:44 Classroom Disclosure Story

23:24 Anger and Humanity

26:55 Distress Tolerance Check

30:19 Death in the News

35:00 Living With Mortality

37:05 Aging and Nature

37:58 Afterlife Questions

40:26 Family Beliefs Clash

42:02 Living With Uncertainty

43:01 Grief Work Origin Story

45:25 Schools Can Talk

47:47 Let Kids Set Pace

53:41 Child Life Support

55:47 Cremation Explained

57:55 Funerals and Rituals

01:02:09 Preparing Kids for Loss

01:05:46 Final Thanks and Wrap

• Website: Elena Lister MD
• Giving Hope by Elena Lister MD, Michael Schwartzman PhD with Lindsey Tate (affiliate link on Bookshop)
• A Short Good Life by Philip Lister MD (affiliate link on Bookshop)