I’ve spent over fifty grand on self-development — courses, masterminds, coaching, therapy, the lot. Every time I clicked enrol I thought, “This will be the one that finally fixes me.”

It never was.

In this episode I unpack why learning and healing don’t stick when you’re still living in survival mode — and how trying to “improve” yourself can quietly become another trauma loop.

We talk about:

•The shame spiral of buying courses and ghosting them.

•What actually happens in the brain when you try to learn while dysregulated.

•Why “investing in yourself” can feel like punishment when you don’t feel safe.

•The moment I realised I wasn’t lazy — I was traumatised.

•How to start again, small and guilt-free.

Takeaway:

You don’t need another program to prove your worth. You need peace, space, and a nervous system that believes you’re already enough.

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