In this powerful episode, host Michael Hoskins sits down with John Zellner to discuss the hidden traps that sabotage even the strongest relationships. John opens up about his upbringing in a conservative "Bible Belt" town and the "darkest point" of his life during college where he drifted from his faith.The heart of this conversation dives deep into The 4 Marriage Killers—inspired by the research of Dr. John Gottman—and how these behaviors nearly destroyed John’s own marriage. John identifies how he struggled with:Criticism: Having a critical spirit and comparing himself to others.Contempt: Letting frustrations stew into a "teapot" of resentment.Defensiveness: The prideful need to justify mistakes instead of practicing humility.Stonewalling: Walking away or staying silent during conflict.John also shares how discovering his neurodivergence and understanding attachment styles helped him and his wife, Brittany, move from chaos to a place of Shalom. Whether you are a husband looking to lead your home better or a couple struggling with conflict resolution, this testimony offers hope and practical resources like "Jimmy on Relationships" and "When God Writes Your Love Story"
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Chapters
00:00
Introduction and Setting the Stage
02:25
John's Early Life and Faith Journey
06:47
College Life: Struggles and Discoveries
10:14
Navigating Relationships and Guilt
15:30
The Impact of Family and Loss
22:55
Learning Empathy and Compassion
30:09
Marriage: Expectations vs. Reality
37:28
Conflict Resolution and Understanding Neurodivergence
38:28
Understanding Neurodivergence and Communication Challenges
41:47
Conflict Resolution in Marriage
45:46
The Four Horsemen of Marriage
48:12
The Importance of Setting Expectations in Relationships
51:53
The Role of Prayer and Spiritual Leadership
54:46
Navigating Family Dynamics and Spiritual Practices
58:07
The Impact of Shabbat on Family Relationships
01:02:52
Resources for Strengthening Relationships
01:08:49
Encouragement for Those Struggling in Relationships

Resources
Jimmy on Relationships
https://www.youtube.com/@JimmyonRelationships
John Gottman / The Gottman Institute
https://www.gottman.com/blog/the-four-horsemen-recognizing-criticism-contempt-defensiveness-and-stonewalling/
Eric and Leslie Ludy
https://www.amazon.com/When-Writes-Your-Story-Expanded/dp/1601421656
Les and Leslie Parrot
https://www.amazon.com/Saving-Your-Marriage-Before-Starts/dp/0310259827