Summary:

In this episode, we go where no "serious" podcast should: the philosophy of the "Spank Bank." What starts as a high-brow attempt to link Plato’s Allegory of the Cave to pornography quickly devolves into a hilarious confession of male insecurity and confusion. We discuss the "fortress under siege" that is the teenage male brain, admit our total ignorance of the female experience, and prove once and for all that we have no idea what we're talking about. Come for the shadow puppets, stay for the awkward panic. It’s an unscripted, unfiltered, and deeply sweaty look at the "bro science" of desire—featuring a mansplaination of the female anatomy with 0% accuracy and 100% confidence. Please correct us.

Key Topics:

• The Disclaimer: Why we are sweating before we even start.
• The Philosophy of Smut: Was Plato's Allegory of the Cave just the first instance of "nerd porn"?
• Imagination vs. Reality: The lost art of the "Spank Bank" vs. the internet age.
• Confessions: The weirdest places we've ever "auditioned the hand puppets" (featuring: a friend's house and a high school bathroom).
• The Gender Gaps are Real.

Memorable Quotes:

• "The first porn was some guy looked at some bushes and thought they looked like titties."
• "I'm very nervous, I'm sweating."
• "Your fortress is being besieged."