There's a difference between being an actual victim and victim mentality. Real harm (abuse, loss, institutional failures) isn't your fault, but staying trapped in blame keeps you miserable. An atheist once told me to own my choices after leaving religion—life-changing! Jesus makes accountability less scary because His partnership heals us even when we're wrong. Ask God: "Where's my accountability?" Freedom comes through taking responsibility for what we can control while healing from what we couldn't.

My 3-year-old Sophie is snuggling with me today (perfect timing for this topic!). My friend shared something profound: relief often doesn't come in our darkest closet-floor moments—it comes after we somehow get back up and keep trying. When I look back at my lowest points, I couldn't feel God then, but now I see He was carrying me through pain so deep that even divine help felt absent. Gather evidence from your own life of when relief came—maybe not on your timeline, but it did come. Deep breath. Let's go.

With endless spiritual resources, I sometimes replace my own investment in God with other people's content! While podcasts are great, nothing replaces YOUR relationship with the divine. Living differently than those around you requires personal divine guidance. After a year in AA with people of all belief systems, the common thread was: personal relationship with a higher power matters most. Pick something simple and sustainable—one prayer, four minutes of reading—consistency builds connection better than grand gestures.