When someone you love is struggling with addiction, it's easy to feel like you only have two options: fix it or walk away. But there's a third path—and it starts with understanding that while you can't force recovery, you're not powerless either.

In this episode, I'm joined by Pam Lanhart, founder and executive director of Thrive Family Recovery Resources, a nonprofit supporting families affected by substance use and addiction. Pam is the daughter, sister, and mother of loved ones who have struggled with addiction, and after losing her son Jake, she's dedicated her life to helping families create the conditions for lasting recovery through compassionate, evidence-based approaches.

Together, we discuss:

• Why "tough love" often creates more chaos than change
• What CRAFT and Invitation to Change are—and how families can use them
• The role shame plays in relapse, especially during family visits
• How to set firm boundaries without damaging the relationship
• What ambivalence really means—and why it isn't the same as not wanting recovery
• The neuroscience behind behavior change and building new neural pathways
• Practical ways to respond during moments of crisis without becoming the fixer or crisis manager

Whether you're a parent, sibling, partner, or friend, this conversation will help you better understand addiction recovery, communicate more effectively, and support your loved one without losing yourself in the process.

If you've ever felt like you were failing someone you love, this episode is for you. You're not powerless—and you don't have to navigate family recovery alone.

📘 Download our FREE, sibling e-book: 6 actions to help navigate a sibling’s substance use journey

🤝 Join our FREE and PRIVATE sibling-focused community: Siblings For Love of Recovery

📲 Connect with FLOR: Instagram and TikTok

🎙 Guest speaker: Pam Lanhart, founder and executive director of Thrive Family Recovery Resources

Episode resources:

• Join Thrive’s Family Support Facebook Group

• About the Invitation to Change (ITC) method

• About CRAFT
  

When one child is struggling with addiction, the fear and focus can consume everything — but what happens to the other kids in the house, the siblings who are angry, the ones who seem fine but aren't?

In this episode, Kathleen Cochran, a mother and founder of Moms For All Paths to Recovery talks about one of the hardest and least-discussed realities of family addiction: how do you show up for all of your children when one of them is in crisis?

Kathleen speaks honestly about the impossible triage of parenting under pressure — protecting one child while not losing another, supporting the siblings who are angry, grieving, or quietly holding everything together, and recognizing the weight carried by the child who always seemed fine.

She also opens up about the guilt that comes with realizing you unintentionally forced your other children to grow up too soon and carry the burden of being the parentified child.

This episode is for parents in the thick of trying to save their child but realize their other children need their support too, and parents who are ready to rebuild their relationship with their kids.

📘 Download our FREE, sibling e-book: 6 actions to help navigate a sibling’s substance use journey

🤝Join our FREE and PRIVATE sibling-focused community: Siblings For Love of Recovery

📲Connect with FLOR: Instagram and TikTok

🎙Guest speaker: Kathleen Cochran, founder of "Moms for All Paths to Recovery" Group:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/momsforallpaths/

Join our live discussion on July 1st at 4pm EST / 7pm PST

Learn about how Narcan (Naloxone) saves lives: https://www.cdc.gov/opioids/naloxone.html

Is Al-Anon and 12-Step the best approach for families navigating their loved one’s addiction? The pressure to issue ultimatums or cut them off entirely can feel like the only path forward. But what if the advice you've been given is outdated, incomplete, not for you, or just wrong?

In this episode, Jane Mackey, CEO and founder of We The Village and certified family coach, challenges what families are told about loving someone through addiction, and how to move beyond the 12-step approach used in Al-Anon and Nar-Anon.

Jane found CRAFT (Community Reinforcement and Family Training) after desperately searching for real tools to help someone she loved, and has since built an accessible family coaching program around it.

Together, we get into:

• Why "tough love" and "rock bottom" became the default, and where they actually fall short

• The enabling myth: how to tell the difference between hurting and helping

• How to respond to their substance use without losing control

• Why cutting someone off makes it harder for them to get help and can reduce your influence over their recovery

• Whether CRAFT and 12-step can coexist, or if they're fundamentally at odds

• How families report feeling less anxious and depressed through CRAFT — even when their loved one never gets help

If you've ever felt like you're choosing between abandoning someone you love and losing yourself entirely, this episode is for you.

We The Village is offering listeners 20% off their programs — use code FLOR at wethevillage.co

📘Download our FREE, sibling e-book: 6 actions to help navigate a sibling’s substance use journey

🤝Join our FREE and PRIVATE sibling-focused community: Siblings For Love of Recovery

📲Connect with FLOR: Instagram and TikTok
🎙Guest speaker: Jane Macky, founder and CEO of We The Village