Episode 3: Being the Strong Friend is Actually Mad Weak
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Episode 3: Being the Strong Friend is Actually Mad Weak
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We’re taught that being “the strong one” is something to be proud of. The reliable friend. The person who doesn’t need much. The one who just handles things.
But denying yourself isn’t strength. It’s self-erasure.
In this episode, I talk through how masking your needs, pushing through discomfort, and refusing support doesn’t make you resilient. It makes you emotionally irrelevant in your own life and in the lives of the people who actually care about you.
Using my recent decision to request accommodations at both work and school as a backdrop, I reflect on how deeply ingrained self-denial can become, especially for people who are used to being capable, dependable, and low-maintenance. This isn’t an episode about disability or labels. It’s about self-advocacy, self-respect, and unlearning the idea that suffering quietly is a virtue.
We talk about why “thugging it out” is often mistaken for strength, how refusing help cuts you off from connection, and why asking for what you need is not a weakness but a skill most people were never taught.
This is a conversation about choosing sustainability over performance, and presence over pride.
No shame.
No savior complex.
Just perspective.