『Episode 218: Stop Waiting to Feel Confident: A New Mindset for Educators and Leaders』のカバーアート

Episode 218: Stop Waiting to Feel Confident: A New Mindset for Educators and Leaders

Episode 218: Stop Waiting to Feel Confident: A New Mindset for Educators and Leaders

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 Episode 218 Stop Waiting to Feel Confident: A New Mindset for Educators and Leaders -- Mindset for Life The Truth About Confidence Most People Miss In this episode of Mindset for Life, Bethanie Hansen unpacks one of the most damaging myths thoughtful educators and leaders quietly live by: “When I feel more confident, then I’ll do it.” Drawing from personal experience, psychological research, and mindset theory, Bethanie explains why confidence is not a prerequisite for action—it’s the result of it. Confidence Is Built, Not Found Bethanie begins by challenging the common belief that some people are simply “naturally confident.” The poised public speaker, the relaxed leader, the effortless performer. While they may appear to have been born that way, research and real-life stories tell a different story. She shares her own journey of submitting a conference proposal long before she felt “ready.” Presenting to a room of 200 people didn’t come from already feeling confident; the confidence came after taking the risk and doing it anyway. This experience becomes a starting point for reframing how we think about confidence in our work and lives. The “Waiting Cycle” That Keeps Capable People Stuck Bethanie introduces what she calls the waiting cycle: We tell ourselves we’ll act “when we feel more confident.” We avoid opportunities because we don’t feel ready yet. We gain no new experience, so our confidence never grows. Our lack of confidence becomes “evidence” that we’re not ready. The cycle repeats. Using Albert Bandura’s concept of self-efficacy, Bethanie explains that confidence grows most strongly through mastery experiences—actually doing something and seeing progress. As James Clear puts it, “confidence follows evidence.” Without action, we never generate the evidence our brain needs to update what it believes about us. Why Thoughtful, High-Achieving People Struggle Most Interestingly, Bethanie points out that capable, thoughtful professionals often struggle with confidence more than others. Why? They see more complexity and are keenly aware of what they don’t know. They hold themselves to higher standards and are more self-critical. They are more likely to experience imposter feelings, underestimating their own competence even when they’re highly skilled. Instead of seeing this self-awareness as weakness, Bethanie encourages listeners to recognize it as a strength, a sign that you care deeply about doing things well. The Three Ingredients of Real Confidence Bethanie breaks confidence down into three core ingredients: Action – Taking a step, even a small one, in the direction you want to go. Experience – Learning from what happens when you act. Evidence – Allowing your brain to collect proof that you are capable, which gradually reshapes your identity and beliefs about yourself. This framework aligns with Carol Dweck’s growth mindset research: “Becoming is better than being.” Confidence grows as part of the ongoing process of becoming—not from perfection or having everything figured out in advance. Small, Practical Steps to Build Confidence Rather than waiting for a sudden surge of confidence, Bethanie offers simple, concrete actions listeners can take: Speak up once in a meeting. Apply for an opportunity you’ve been hesitating on. Start a small stretch project. Share an idea with someone you trust. These actions are rooted in behavioral activation research, which shows that action often precedes emotional change. In other words, how you feel changes after you move, not before. From Comfort to Courage Bethanie closes with an empowering reframe: if you’ve been questioning your confidence, it may simply mean you’re standing at the edge of something new, not that anything is wrong with you. Drawing on Brené Brown’s insight, “You can choose courage or you can choose comfort, but you cannot have both,” she invites listeners to stop waiting for confidence and instead choose courageous, imperfect action. Take one small step. Let experience teach you what you’re capable of. Confidence will grow from there. This episode is for educators, leaders, and thoughtful professionals who want to: Stop procrastinating on important goals because they “don’t feel ready” Understand the psychology behind confidence and self-doubt Adopt a growth mindset toward their work and calling Translate insight into small, sustainable actions that build genuine confidence over time This episode's theme song is "Better Every Bell" by Bethanie Hansen and SUNO AI. Used with Permission. Like what you read here? In this podcast, I’m sharing some core principles I’ve learned in coaching that have completely changed my life. And I share them in workshops with my clients. To take it to deeper and make lasting changes, join me in the Resilience Workshop.
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