If your child has ever said,

“Leave me alone.”

“Stop talking to me.”

Or completely shut you out…

…this episode is for you.

Because what looks like rejection on the outside is often something very different on the inside.

In Episode 18 of Raise Strong, we explore one of the most confusing and painful parenting experiences:

When your child pushes you away at the exact moment they need you most.

In this episode, you’ll discover:

• Why avoidant behavior is often a stress response, not defiance
• What’s happening in your child’s brain and nervous system in these moments
• How attachment shifts during middle childhood and preteen years
• Why pushing harder often creates more distance
• What to say (and what not to say) when your child shuts down
• How to stay emotionally available without overwhelming your child
• The difference between giving space and creating disconnection

When children push us away, our instinct is to move closer… louder, faster, and with more urgency.

We ask more questions.

We try to fix it.

We take it personally.

But here’s the shift:

Distance is often a protective strategy, not a rejection.

Your child is not saying,

“I don’t need you.”

They are often saying,

“This feels like too much, and I don’t know how to handle it.”

When we respond with pressure, we increase that overwhelm.

When we respond with steadiness, we create safety.

Instead of:

“Talk to me right now.”

“Why are you acting like this?”

“You need to tell me what’s going on.”

You might say:

“I’m here when you’re ready.”

“You don’t have to talk right now.”

“We can try again later.”

You’re not giving up.

You’re giving your child space to regulate without losing connection.

This stage can feel like you’re losing your child.

But in reality, you’re being invited to change how you show up.

Less control.

More presence.

Less urgency.

More trust.

Children don’t need perfect words in these moments.

They need to feel:

“I can come back to you when I’m ready… and you’ll still be there.”

That’s what builds long-term trust.

RESOURES:

• 3 Mistakes That Make Sibling Fights Worse... (And What to Do Instead) - https://alexandersonkahl.com/3-mistakes/
• Stop Saying “Hurry Up.”Say This Instead. - https://alexandersonkahl.com/hurry-up/
• Calm Down Corner Essentials - https://bit.ly/48WbUUh
• 7 Simple Phrases to Help Your Child Calm Down Without Power Struggles - Download your FREE guide now! - AlexAndersonKahl.com/7-simple-phrases
• Visit Our Website - AlexAndersonKahl.com
• The Meltdown Map: 5 Steps to Handle your Child's Big Emotions - AlexAndersonKahl.com/meltdown-map

Your One Action Step This Week

The next time your child pulls away:

Pause.

Lower the intensity.

Offer one steady line:

"I’m here when you’re ready.”

Then let that be enough.

Connection is not built in the moment you push.

It’s built in the moments you stay.