Why are you so hard on yourself — and how do you actually stop?

In this episode of Really, Universe?, Mari breaks down the voice in your head that shows up right after something goes well and finds the one thing that didn't.

Drawing on the negativity bias research from Episode 3, Brené Brown's finding that perfectionism is about shame avoidance rather than self-improvement, and a landmark 2011 meta-analysis on self-talk in athletic performance, Mari explains why your inner critic isn't a quality-control department — it's an outdated threat-detection system running on autopilot.

Walk away with three specific, research-backed tools: how to audit your inner critic before trying to silence it, how to build genuinely effective affirmations the way elite athletes do (with real examples from Serena Williams, Naomi Osaka, Tom Brady, and Simone Biles), and how to look for evidence that reinforces the new voice instead of the old one.

• Brown, B. (2012). Daring Greatly. Gotham Books. (Perfectionism as shame avoidance, not self-improvement.)
• Hatzigeorgiadis, A., Zourbanos, N., Galanis, E., & Theodorakis, Y. (2011). Self-talk and sports performance: A meta-analysis. Perspectives on Psychological Science, 6(4), 348-356.
• Achor, S. (2024). The Power of Beliefs. Harvard Business Review Press. (Athlete belief research and performance.)
• Neff, K. (2011). Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself. William Morrow.
• Beck, A.T. (1979). Cognitive Therapy of Depression. Guilford Press. (Cognitive distortions and the inner critic.)
• Baumeister, R.F., et al. (2001). Bad is stronger than good. Review of General Psychology, 5(4), 323-370. (Negativity bias — see also Episode 3.)
• Greater Good Science Center, UC Berkeley. Self-Compassion. greatergood.berkeley.edu
• American Psychological Association. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. apa.org

SOCIALS

Youtube:

www.youtube.com/@maripeck

Website

https://www.reallyuniverse.com/