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Survival mode is sneaky because it can feel like “I’m just handling life” right up until you pause and realize you’ve been white knuckling everything for years. I’m Grace Sandra, and I’m talking about the way trauma, chronic stress, and a cruel culture can plant beliefs in us that sound true but quietly wreck our self-worth, our relationships, and our health.

I share a personal story from the years after leaving a severely abusive marriage, when CPTSD, grief, postpartum fallout, financial pressure, and perimenopause collided and I truly believed I wouldn’t survive. From that place, the mind starts looping on lies: I have to do everything alone, rest is laziness, my worth is what I produce, being needed means being loved, and if I stop everything will fall apart. We slow each one down and tell the truth about what it costs, especially for Black women who are constantly expected to be strong, silent, and self-sacrificing.

Then we get practical. I explain why journaling and expressive writing are such powerful tools for nervous system regulation, reducing rumination, and challenging the “something is wrong with me” storyline that can come with complex PTSD. I talk guided prompts, simple daily habits like gratitude and affirmations, and how writing helps you name the lie and replace it with something real. If you’re trying to get out of survival mode, this is a gentle place to start.

If this resonates, subscribe, share it with a friend who’s carrying too much, and leave a five-star review so more people can find Out Here Trying To Survive. What’s one survival mode lie you’re ready to stop believing?

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