QUIETNESS (MARCH 18)

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"True silence is the rest of the mind and is to the spirit what sleep is to the body, nourishment and refreshment" (William Penn).

OUR NEED FOR QUIETNESS SEEMS TO INCREASE WITH EACH PASSING DAY. It’s a loud world we live in, in more ways than one, and we can’t endure loudness without some moments of relief. Torturers have always known that it’s possible to drive a human being insane by subjecting him to incessant noise, even if it’s no more than the dripping of water. We have an irrevocable need for quiet: our minds and hearts need stillness and silence to rest. And not only that, they need these things to grow. “I cannot be the man I should be without times of quietness. Stillness is an essential part of growing deeper as we grow older” (Charles R. Swindoll).

Our need for quietness, however, shouldn’t send us into the woods or up to the mountaintop to live apart from any other human beings. Quietness, like physical sleep, is a necessity now and then, but it’s not the ultimate goal of life, and we can’t allow our enjoyment of things like meditation to detract from our responsibilities to other people. As Morton Kelsey suggests, “What we do with our lives outwardly, how well we care for others, is as much a part of meditation as what we do in quietness and turning inward.”

Yet there’s no denying that we need more quietness than we usually attain in these days of urgent activity. The busier our lives become, the more discipline it takes to eke out times of solitude and serenity. Merely confessing that quietness is a virtue would be a step in the right direction, putting us on the path to greater joy. We’re too quick to dismiss ideals like quietness and simplicity as being obsolete, and we need to start appreciating their goodness once more. “Happiness is the harvest of a quiet eye” (Austin O’Malley).

Quietness is an aspect of maturity — physically, emotionally, and even spiritually. Both the perception of its value and the discipline of its practice require personal growth. And like most forms of positive growth, quietness calls for commitment.

If only I may grow
firmer,
simpler,
quieter,
warmer.
(Dag Hammarskjöld)

Gary Henry - WordPoints.com + AreYouaChristian.com

ADVICE (MARCH 17)

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"Four eyes see better than two" (Old Saying).

IT’S A FOOLISH PERSON INDEED WHO DOESN’T APPRECIATE THE VALUE OF ADVICE. When we’re faced with a decision-making situation, none of us can see everything that would be profitable to see. We need the supplementary vision that comes from other eyes, and to the extent that we let our viewpoint be enlarged and improved by other people’s perspectives, our decisions will turn out better.

There are some, no doubt, who go to the opposite extreme, taking the advice of everyone they meet, regardless of whether the advice is good, bad, or mediocre. But the person who takes everyone’s advice is just as foolish as the person who doesn’t take anybody’s. At some point, we have to take responsibility for our own choices. We should heed good advice and disregard that which is not so good — and then we must make our decisions independently.

But therein lies the trick! If we could always tell the difference between good and bad advice, we probably wouldn’t need any advice. As Wilson Mizner said, “To profit from good advice requires more wisdom than to give it.” So, we need to grow in wisdom — the wisdom required to recognize and act on good advice.

Our most common mistake is disregarding advice that conflicts with our preferences and preconceived ideas. Whoever agrees with our preferred course of action is “wise,” and his advice is “good,” while the fellow who warns us we’re on the wrong track is usually written off as someone who “just doesn’t understand.”

But sometimes the best advice is the most uncomfortable. And not only that, but the best advice may come from unwelcome sources, perhaps even our enemies. Yet if we know what’s good for us, we’ll learn to profit from helpful advice, regardless of where it comes from or how little we may want to hear it.

In my experience, the best advice usually has to be sought. We must actively look for it; it doesn’t usually look for us. Because they desire to be courteous, many of our friends won’t speak frankly about our circumstances unless we ask them to. And as we all know, asking for advice can be embarrassing. But if we stay silent when we need help, we only hurt ourselves in the long run.

"I not only use all the brains I have but all I can borrow" (Woodrow Wilson).

Gary Henry - WordPoints.com + AreYouaChristian.com

PONDERING (MARCH 16)

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"First ponder, then dare" (Helmuth von Moltke).

IT’S TRUE THAT MOST OF US NEED TO BE MORE ADVENTURESOME, BUT IT’S ALSO TRUE THAT WE NEED TO PONDER OUR DEEDS BEFORE WE DO THEM. As von Moltke says, the correct order of action is “First ponder, then dare.” And the more consequential the dare, the more profound should be the pondering that precedes it.

“Ponder” comes from the Latin pondus (“weight”). It means to consider something carefully. When we ponder, we “weigh” an idea in our minds, thinking how significant it is or, if the thought is one of action, what its outcome might be. Pondering is more than casual thinking — it is thinking with care and thoroughness.

There is no better way to build credibility than to be a person who ponders things. Living impulsively is not the way to become trustworthy. In fact, we shouldn’t have much credibility if we don’t consider things carefully. If we’re known to act rashly, we’ll not be the people our friends turn to in times of need or difficulty. Our carelessness will keep us from being as trusted as we’d like to be.

The notion that ideas can be “weighed” in our minds ought to be of more than passing interest. Contrary to what many seem to think nowadays, not all ideas are equal and interchangeable. Some have more weight than others; that is, some are more true, significant, beneficial, beautiful, and so forth. The challenge in thinking is to discern, by pondering them, which ideas are weighty and which are not. When we’re making decisions, we need to let the weighty ideas count for more and pay less attention to the lighter-weight trivia. And the same principle applies when we’re weighing our words: we should choose wisely between words that are good, better, and best.

Being a person who ponders things may sound pretty dull, as if that person never did anything but think. But the truth is, life is never dull when we’re in a receptive state of mind. Those who take the time to ponder the world and its happenings often find that surprises break into their reveries. When we meditate wisely, we’re not merely passing time; we’re preparing for a breakthrough. Pondering opens our hearts and minds to happy discoveries!

"I keep the subject constantly before me, and wait till the first dawnings open slowly, by little and little, into a full and clear light" (Isaac Newton).

Gary Henry - WordPoints.com + AreYouaChristian.com

DISCUSSION (MARCH 15)

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"No discussion between two persons can be of any use, until each knows clearly what it is that the other asserts" (Lewis Carroll).

WHEN WE DISCUSS THINGS, WE OFTEN ERR BY TALKING WHEN WE SHOULD BE LISTENING. Taking it for granted that we understand what the other person is saying, we’re primarily concerned with whether they understand what we are saying to them. Understanding is not as important to us as being understood, and so our discussions often fizzle out ineffectively. What could have been a dialogue between two inquirers, and therefore an exercise in understanding, becomes a pair of monologues between two talkers, both of whom are in a defensive crouch rather than a learning posture.

Our English word “discuss” comes from a compound Latin verb: dis- (“apart”) + quatere (“to shake”). So, the literal meaning to “shake apart.” But the thing “shaken apart” is not one’s counterpart in the discussion — it’s the subject being discussed. To discuss something means to inspect it closely by exchanging ideas and viewpoints. When two people discuss a matter, they speak to one another about it in an effort to ascertain truth or reach agreement. To discuss is to “talk over” something — in other words, to consider a topic by means of conversation. The colloquial expression “put our heads together” is a colorful way of describing the cooperation that occurs in a discussion.

Discussion helps to clarify our thinking. “Reading makes a full man, meditation a profound man, discourse a clear man” (Benjamin Franklin). We learn not just by thinking but by conversing, and most of us need to go through the give-and-take of a few discussions before we can see a subject clearly. “As iron sharpens iron, so a man sharpens the countenance of his friend” (Book of Proverbs).

But there is another, more important, reason discussions are valuable: they help us along the path to common understanding. It is through discussion that groups of people meld their visions into a shared vision and their commitments into mutual commitments.

Discussions can sometimes turn contentious, as we all know, but they don’t have to. And when they’re conducted respectfully, as among friends, they are one of life’s biggest joys. Debates and defenses have their place occasionally, but discussions have theirs too.

"The more the pleasures of the body fade away, the greater to me is the pleasure and charm of conversation" (Plato).

Gary Henry - WordPoints.com + AreYouaChristian.com

LIFE (MARCH 14)

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"Life is a hard fight, a struggle, a wrestling with the principle of evil, hand to hand, foot to foot. Every inch of the way is disputed. The night is given us to take breath and to pray, to drink deep at the fountain of power. The day, to use the strength that has been given us, to go forth to work with it till the evening" (Florence Nightingale).

TO LIVE — THAT IS, TO BE FULLY ALIVE — IS A TEST OF THE HIGHEST POWERS WITHIN US. The thing that can truly be called “life” can’t be reached by taking the course of least resistance. It can only be enjoyed by those prepared to grasp it decisively and with determination. With anything less than that, we find that we’re not really living; we’re just passive puppets who are “being lived.”

Most of us can probably sympathize with Jules Laforgue’s sentiment: “Oh, how daily life is!” It keeps coming at us quickly, one day after another, one moment after another. Continually, continually, continually these appear, as if marching to an inexorable drumbeat. One is no sooner done with a day than another presents itself to be dealt with. Each of these days and moments challenges our sense of stewardship: will we use the time to a good end or let it go by unimproved? If we default and do nothing (at least nothing worth doing), the unused increments of our lives eventually pile up behind us, creating a sad monument to negligence and lost opportunity.

So the gift of life — and it truly is a gift — must be received properly. We must appreciate it, certainly, but beyond that, we must use it. It is to be employed as well as enjoyed. And the best employment is to use it defending and enhancing the lives of those around us, helping them have a greater measure of life in all its dimensions.

When we live responsibly, we recognize our connection to other people (and even to the plants and animals that share our habitat). Except in rare circumstances, human life is a communal experience rather than a solo affair. We’re living at our best when we relate ourselves rightly to the “unimaginable whole” of which we are each a part. And what a delightful “whole” it happens to be!

"Life is a roar of bargain and battle, but in the very heart of it there rises a mystic spiritual tone that gives meaning to the whole. It transmutes the dull details into romance. It reminds us that our only but wholly adequate significance is as parts of the unimaginable whole. It suggests that even while we think we are egotists we are living to ends outside ourselves" (Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.).

Gary Henry - WordPoints.com + AreYouaChristian.com

TRUTH (MARCH 13)

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"The ideals which have lighted my way, and time after time have given me new courage to face life cheerfully, have been kindness, beauty, and truth" (Albert Einstein).

TRUTH IS NOT THE CREATION OF WEAK PEOPLE’S IMAGINATIONS; IT’S A STRONG AND NOBLE REALITY. Many of those who think it’s intellectually unsophisticated to talk about truth wouldn’t be qualified to carry the briefcase of a man like Einstein, who not only talked about it but also honored it, sought it, and used it to noble ends.

We may as well admit it: we fight hopelessly anytime we fight against something as robust as truth. Reality is sturdy; ultimately, it is unassailable. In the short term, we might get away with conduct that’s based on falsehood, but eventually the truth will assert itself. As Edgar J. Mohn colorfully said, “A lie has speed, but truth has endurance.” So philosophically, we ought to stay away from untruth. But not only philosophically, we ought to avoid it personally. It simply does no good to deal in deceit. “Every time you try to smother a truth, two others get their breath” (Bill Copeland). So wouldn’t it be smart just to go ahead and commit ourselves to the truth?

Doing that, however, requires more strength and diligence than we might suppose. Truth is not always easy to find, and the reason is one we may not like to confront. “We do not err because truth is difficult to see. It is visible at a glance. We err because this is more comfortable” (Alexander Solzhenitsyn). For every instance when we haven’t looked hard enough for the truth, there are hundreds of other times when we’ve run away from truth that was in plain view. Our difficulty is not so much ignorance as it is cowardice. To put it bluntly, a commitment to truth is a severe test of our bravery.

A fearless commitment to truth is one of the major components of moral human character. As far as I can see, it might even be the greatest of all. No matter what other virtues we may possess, without a commitment to truth, everything else fades away.

But we don’t honor truth by paying lip service to it; we do it by submitting to it. That means we must follow it rather than try to lead it. There’s just no calculating the good that can happen when we expend our energies in the service of truth — or the damage that’s done when we use our powers to subvert it.

"I have one request: may I never use my reason against truth" (Elie Wiesel).

Gary Henry - WordPoints.com + AreYouaChristian.com

SATISFACTION (MARCH 12)

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"He is well paid that is well satisfied" (William Shakespeare).

MANY THINGS WE MAY NOT HAVE, BUT IF WE HAVE WHAT GIVES US SATISFACTION, WE CAN GIVE THANKS. No two of us are exactly the same, so we’re not going to be satisfied by the same things. Yet the world we live in is so wonderfully varied that there is something to satisfy everybody. What we must do is decide to find satisfaction in our own pursuits. Rather than being seduced by the advertisers and entertainers to want things that wouldn’t be satisfying even if we had them, we’d do better to bow our heads and give humble thanks for our own real satisfactions.

It’s a common misconception that satisfaction is the same thing as apathy or indifference, but it’s not. Genuine satisfaction doesn’t mean complacency; it means contentment. Satisfaction still leaves room for growth, and it knows how to aspire to greater things. But it also knows how to enjoy and be honestly grateful for present benefits. What it comes down to is this: things don’t have to be perfectly satisfying for them to be pleasantly satisfying.

It’s an old suggestion, but it still contains a lot of good sense: simple things are often the most satisfying, although they don’t make the news headlines. As I am writing this, for example, the morning sun has just climbed above the horizon and warmed the waiting world with a golden glow. As I look up from my writing desk and take in the view outside my window, I see something that is satisfying in a simple way. Whatever else I may not have on this day in my life, I’ve enjoyed something that should content my soul.

But life isn’t just about being satisfied; it’s about giving satisfaction to others. It’s not always possible to do that, of course, but when it is, we should be eager to do it, even if it means going the extra mile. Sacrificing to see that others are satisfied is one of life’s privileges.

You may never have thought about it, but your satisfaction is a contributor to the satisfaction of those around you. Knowing and working with people who are at peace within themselves is one of life’s most refreshing joys, and we do our friends a favor when we choose to be satisfied. Not apathetic, mind you. But satisfied.

"Let a man’s talents or virtues be what they may, we only feel satisfaction in his society as he is satisfied in himself" (William Hazlitt).

Gary Henry - WordPoints.com + AreYouaChristian.com

DEVELOPMENT (MARCH 11)

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"Those who won our independence believed that the final end of the State was to make men free to develop their faculties" (Justice Louis Brandeis).

FREEDOM IS NOT GIVEN TO US FOR SELFISH INDULGENCE; IT’S MEANT TO BE USED IN REACHING OUR POTENTIAL. This is as true of our civil liberties as it is of those that are more personal in nature. Even the laws and regulations under which we live are for the purpose of creating conditions in which we can flourish and “develop [our] faculties,” as Brandeis put it. Not many people realize that’s what freedom is for, and many who know it don’t take full advantage of it, but freedom is meant to help us grow. It’s not about doing whatever we want; it’s about becoming all we’re capable of.

There is a sense in which human lives have to be “unfolded” or “unpacked.” They don’t come already put together, and to say (as the label always tells you when you’re in a hurry) that “some assembly is required” is a considerable understatement. So “development” is the word we often use to describe what has to happen if a person’s character is going to become all it’s capable of being. It’s as if many things are wrapped up in us that have to be unpacked.

Like many worthwhile things, the development of character takes time. It’s not work that can be done in a day. In fact, when we look at it properly, we recognize that it’s a lifelong process. No matter how long we live, our character still needs some development.

But haven’t we all seen a tendency in our lives to stop developing? Indeed, avoiding stagnation is one of the primary challenges we face as we grow older. It takes extraordinary commitment and discipline to keep on developing as long as we’re in this world.

Serious issues are at stake, however. The choice that confronts us is, as someone has said, “Develop or die.” Our endowments are wonderful. Our resources are abundant. Our potential is so vast that it seems unlimited. But none of these things can be neglected without frightful consequences later on. If there’s a law that’s clearly written on every page of nature’s book, it is this: use it or lose it.

"In every animal . . . a more frequent and continuous use of any organ gradually strengthens, develops, and enlarges that organ . . . while the permanent disuse of any organ imperceptibly weakens and deteriorates it, and progressively diminishes its functional capacity, until it finally disappears" (Jean-Baptiste Lamarck).

Gary Henry - WordPoints.com + AreYouaChristian.com