You've been told to leave your feelings at the door. But what if that's exactly what's breaking your team?

Lillian is a change management specialist with 35 years of experience working across the Netherlands and the Caribbean. In this conversation, we get into why emotions keep getting treated as a problem to solve when they're actually the most useful information in the room.

We talk about why change keeps failing even when the methodology is perfect, what happens when leaders outsource their instincts to AI, and the one question Lillian asks junior managers that always gets a laugh and then opens everything up.

This is a conversation about efficiency, trust, and what it actually costs to stay human at work.

Drop Your Noise is shortlisted for Podcast of the Year, Women in Business Awards 2025. Hosted by Kirti Daryanani, founder of Kirtana168 and creator of the PAU...SE. methodology

00:00 Are you outsourcing your social intelligence to AI?01:17 Lillian introduces herself, 35 years of change before it had a name04:03 The speed problem: AI, efficiency, and why faster isn't always better06:23 Why emotions got left out of change management11:10 Resistance isn't a problem. It's information.12:01 The seating story: how one small blindside derailed an entire team22:00 The AI in the meeting room, when a leader consulted ChatGPT instead of asking the person in front of them29:29 When methodology replaces gut instinct33:45 Why high-performing leaders have been conditioned to see emotion as inefficiency39:53 Emotion is just information. That's it.47:38 Change fatigue is real and the antidote isn't mindfulness51:07 Lillian's practical moves: how to talk about emotions without saying the word54:11 Professional maturity and what it means to not take things personally57:16 Nobody can lead change they haven't accepted in themselves first1:02:27 The unwritten rules: the one question that tells you everything about where emotion is being suppressed