I am not enough. It is a terrifying phrase that goes through our heads on quite a regular basis about a plethora of things. Let me tell you a few of the stories I have heard just from my close circle of friends.

Bekah leads boot camps. As she leads neighbors and friends through workouts, she also has seen them through cancer battles and through difficult divorces. She regularly is given the opportunity to talk about Christ, but she wonders all the time if she is doing work that is important enough.

Sarah had a massive stroke and spends most of her days in rehabilitation, learning to speak and read and walk again. Yet she has found a way to communicate her worries that she is not a good enough mom to her three kids.

Jessie is in her sixties and divorced many years ago. Jessie glows with love for Jesus. Her kids are grown, so she has free time and recently came to a class on mentoring. But she never followed through. When I reached out to her about it, she said, “I didn’t think anyone would want to be mentored by someone who has been divorced.” Subtly saying, I am not enough.

I want to shake my darling friends. They are pouring out their lives in unique obedient surrender to God, and yet they cannot see that the narrative they are believing is all wrong. And trust me, on a given day they’ve wanted to shake me, too, for believing the same lies.

We are so often dragged along in the darkness, unable to save ourselves from out thoughts and from our shame and from our mistakes. We try to slap self-esteem tactics on our fears, but they don’t stick because well . . . . it’s true. We are not enough.

It would be a terrabily depressing thought – if it weren’t followed by the most freeing truth in all of eternity.

God knew we would never be enough. So He became enough for us. Jesus is our enough.

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. – 2 Corinthians 12:9

The truth that we are not enough and Jesus is enough isn’t just good news on the day that God saves us. We need to preach that truth to ourselves and each other every day. We have been rescued from a life of striving today.

Water. No human can survive three days without it. No other resource is more essential to sustain life. None.

Here is the thing. The enemy promises water, but every time we go to his wells, they are empty. He gives us a sip of water, enough that we keep believing him. We have believed the lie that our cravings will be satisfied if we are enough and if we have enough. So we chase image, answers, things, people—and we wonder all the while, Why am I still thirsty?

God is clear in the book of Jeremiah about what is happening:

My people have committed two sins: They have forsaken me, the spring of living water, and have dug their own cisterns, broken cisterns that cannot hold water. Jeremiah 2:13, NIV.

But there is water for you. Not just enough to quench your thirst, but an unlimited supply that will fill you and then come pouring out of you into a thirsty world. But the water you need is found in only one Source.

I’ll tell you right up front, there is no secret here. Just one answer to your thirst: Jesus.

“If anyone is thirsty, let him come to me and drink,” He says in the gospel of John. “Whoever believes in me…streams of living water will flow from within him.” (John 7:37–38, NIV)

He alone is the source from which flows all the things we crave and hope to become. I love that I can begin here, making no empty promises. Because my single goal is to lead your thirsty soul to streams of living water, to Jesus. He always delivers.

Why go here?

Practically speaking, nothing I am facing in my life changed that day I came to this realization. And yet everything changed.

• I didn’t feel so alone.
• I felt relief.
• I felt loved.
• I felt like I could take a deep breath.
• I felt known.
• I believed Jesus more, that He forgives and is in this all with me.
• I felt the groundswell of freedom that comes from living with Nothing. To. Prove.

And then many will be offended, will betray one another, and will hate one another. —Matthew 24:10

Let’s examine this statement. If we look closely, we can see a progression. An offense leads to betrayal, and betrayal leads to hatred. Offended people build walls for protection. Our focus becomes self-preservation. We must be protected and safe at all costs. This makes us capable of betrayal. When we betray, we seek our own protection or benefit at the expense of someone else—usually someone with whom we are in relationship.

Thus, a betrayal in the kingdom of God comes when a believer seeks his own benefit or protection at the expense of another believer. The closer the relationship, the more severe the betrayal. To betray someone is the ultimate abandonment of covenant. When betrayal occurs, the relationship cannot be restored unless genuine repentance follows.

Betrayal then leads to hatred with serious consequences. The Bible states clearly that anyone who hates his brother is a murderer and that no murderer has eternal life abiding in him – 1 John 3:15.

How sad that we can find example after example of offense, betrayal, and hatred among believers today. It is so rampant in our homes and churches that it is considered normal behavior. We are too numb to grieve when we see minister taking minister to court. It no longer surprises us when Christian couples sue one another for divorce. Church splits are common and predictable. Ministry politics are played at an all-time high. It is disguised as being in the best interest of the kingdom or the church.

“Christians” are protecting their rights, making sure they are not mistreated or taken advantage of by other Christians. Have we forgotten the exhortation of the new covenant?

Why do you not rather accept wrong? Why do you not rather let yourselves be cheated? —1 Corinthians 6:7b

Have we forgotten the words of Jesus?

Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself. —Philippians 2:3

Why don’t we live by these laws of love? Why are we so quick to betray rather than lay down our lives for one another, even at the risk of being cheated? The reason: Our love is cold, which results in our still seeking to protect ourselves. We can no longer confidently commit our care to God when trying to care for ourselves.

When Jesus was wronged, He did not wrong in return but committed His soul to God, who would judge righteously. We are admonished to follow His steps.

For to this you were called, because Christ also suffered for us, leaving us an example, that you should follow His steps: “Who committed no sin, nor was deceit found in His mouth”; who, when He was reviled, did not revile in return; when He suffered, He did not threaten, but committed Himself to Him who judges righteously. —1 Peter 2:21–23

By now, you see how serious the sin of offense is. If it is not dealt with, offense will eventually lead to death. But when you resist the temptation to be offended, God brings great victory.

Declarations Against Offense

Holy Spirit, when an offense comes to me that is more challenging than those for which I have already been spiritually trained, I will allow Your power to bring freedom and healing for any wounds or injuries I have experienced from the offense.

Father, keep me from trying to do things in the strength of my own soul, which will only make me more susceptible to falling. I will admit my true condition, seek Your strength, and be open to Your correction.

Holy Spirit, infuse my prayer with life, not death. Bless the one who has wounded me, and reveal Yourself to him [or her] in a greater way. Fill their life with Your presence, and lead them into greater intimacy with You.

Teach me to have a genuine love for those who have wronged me, for godly, mature love will cover a multitude of sins.

Where are you getting your worldview from?

When we filter everything through past hurts, rejections, and experiences, we find it impossible to believe God. We cannot believe He means what He says. We doubt His goodness and faithfulness since we judge Him by the standards set by man in our lives. But God is not a man! He cannot lie (Num. 23:19). His ways are not like ours, and His thoughts are not ours (Isa. 55:8–9).

Offended people can find Scripture passages to back their position, but it is not the correct division of God’s Word.

Now concerning food offered to idols: we know that “all of us possess knowledge.” This “knowledge” puffs up, but love builds up. If anyone imagines that he knows something, he does not yet know as he ought to know. But if anyone loves God, he is known by God. – 1 Corinthians 8:1-3

The knowledge of God’s Word without love is destructive because it puffs us up with pride and legalism. This causes us to justify ourselves rather than repent of our unforgiveness.

This creates an atmosphere in which we can be deceived because knowledge without the love of God will lead to deception. Jesus warns of false prophets immediately after His statement of many being offended: “Then many false prophets will rise up and deceive many” (Matt. 24:11). Who are the many they will deceive? The answer: the offended whose love has grown cold (Matt. 24:12).

Jesus calls false prophets “wolves in sheep’s clothing” (Matt. 7:15). They are self-seeking men who give the appearance of being Christians (sheep’s clothing) but have the inward nature of a wolf. Wolves like to hang around sheep. They can be found in the congregation as well as in the pulpit. The enemy sends them to infiltrate and deceive. They must be identified by their fruits, not by their teachings or prophecies. Often the teaching can appear sound, whereas the fruit in their lives and ministries is not. A minister or a Christian is what he lives, not what he preaches.

But know this, that in the last days perilous times will come: For men will be . . .unforgiving . . . having a form of godliness but denying its power. And from such people turn away!…For the time will come when they will not endure sound doctrine, but according to their own desires, because they have itching ears, they will heap up for themselves teachers; and they will turn their ears away from the truth. —2 Timothy 3:1–5; 4:3–4

Notice that they will have a form of godliness or “Christianity,” but they will deny its power. How will they deny its power? They deny that Christianity can change them from being unforgiving to forgiving. They will boast of being followers of Jesus and proclaim their “new birth” experience, but what they boast of has not been allowed to pierce their hearts and bring forth the character of Christ.

And then many will be offended, will betray one another, and will hate one another. —Matthew 24:10

Offense is taken down when we see the world clearly. Jesus said our ability to see correctly is another key to freedom from deception. When we are offended, we often see ourselves as victims and blame those who have hurt us. We justify our bitterness, unforgiveness, anger, envy, and resentment as they surface. Sometimes we even resent those who remind us of others who have hurt us.

I counsel you to buy from me gold refined by fire, so you may be rich, and white garments so that you may clothe yourself and the shame of your nakedness may not be seen, and salve to anoint your eyes, so that you may see. – Revelation 3:18

For this reason, Jesus counseled, “Anoint your eyes with eye salve, that you may see”. See what? Your true condition! That’s the only way we can “be zealous and repent,” as Jesus commanded next. You will only repent when you stop blaming other people.

When we blame others and defend our own position, we are blind. We struggle to remove the speck from our brother’s eye while there is a log in ours. It is the revelation of truth that brings freedom to us. When the Spirit of God shows us our sin, He always does it so that it seems separate from us. This brings conviction, not condemnation.

Without God, we can only love with a selfish love—one that cannot be given if it is not received and returned. However, agape loves regardless of the response. This agape is the love Jesus shed when He forgave from the cross. So “the many” Jesus refers to are Christians whose agape has grown cold.

You need to realize that when you sow the love of God, you will reap the love of God. You need to develop faith in this spiritual law— even though you may not harvest it from the field in which you sowed or as quickly as you would like.

He explained, “For the one who sows to his own flesh will from the flesh reap corruption, but the one who sows to the Spirit will from the Spirit reap eternal life. And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up.” – Galatians 6:8–9.

If more Christians recognized this, they wouldn’t give up and become offended. Usually, this is not the type of love we walk in. We walk in a selfish love that is easily disappointed when our expectations are unmet.

A brother offended is harder to win than a strong city, and contentions are like the bars of a castle. —Proverbs 18:19

We construct walls when we are hurt to safeguard our hearts and prevent any future wounds. We become selective, denying entry to all we fear will hurt us. We filter out anyone we think owes us something. We withhold access until these people have paid their debts in full. We open our lives only to those we believe are on our side.

The focus of offended Christians is inward and introspective. We guard our rights and personal relationships carefully. Our energy is consumed with making sure no future injuries will occur. If we don’t risk being hurt, we cannot give unconditional love. Unconditional love gives others the right to hurt us.

Love does not seek its own, but hurt people become more and more self-seeking and self-contained.

Pride keeps you from dealing with truth. It distorts your vision. You never change when you think everything is fine.

And the Lord’s servant must not be quarrelsome but kind to everyone, able to teach, patiently enduring evil, correcting his opponents with gentleness. God may perhaps grant them repentance leading to a knowledge of the truth, and they may come to their senses and escape from the snare of the devil, after being captured by him to do his will. – 2 Timothy 2:24-26

Pride hardens your heart and dims the eyes of your understanding. It keeps you from the change of heart—repentance—that will set you free.

Pride causes you to view yourself as a victim. Your attitude becomes, “I was mistreated and misjudged; therefore, I am justified in my behavior.” You hold back forgiveness because you believe you are innocent and falsely accused. Though your true heart condition is hidden from you, it is not hidden from God. Just because you were mistreated, you do not have permission to hold on to an offense. Two wrongs do not make a right!

“And to the angel of the church in Laodicea write: ‘The words of the Amen, the faithful and true witness, the beginning of God’s creation. “‘I know your works: you are neither cold nor hot. Would that you were either cold or hot! So, because you are lukewarm, and neither hot nor cold, I will spit you out of my mouth. For you say, I am rich, I have prospered, and I need nothing, not realizing that you are wretched, pitiable, poor, blind, and naked. I counsel you to buy from me gold refined by fire, so that you may be rich, and white garments so that you may clothe yourself and the shame of your nakedness may not be seen, and salve to anoint your eyes, so that you may see. Those whom I love, I reprove and discipline, so be zealous and repent. Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and eat with him, and he with me. – Revelation 3:14-20

In the Book of Revelation, Jesus addressed the church of Laodicea by first telling them how they saw themselves as rich, wealthy, and needing nothing, then by exposing their true condition—“wretched, miserable, poor, blind, and naked”. They had mistaken their financial strength for spiritual strength. Pride hid their true condition.

Jesus’ first instruction for breaking free from deception was to buy from me gold refined by fire, so that you may be rich, and white garments so that you may clothe yourself and the shame of your nakedness may not be seen, and salve to anoint your eyes, so that you may see. – Revelation 3:18

Refined gold is soft and pliable, free from corrosion or other substances. When gold is mixed with other metals (copper, iron, nickel, and so on), it becomes hard, less pliable, and more corrosive. This mixture is called an alloy. The higher the percentage of foreign metals, the harder the gold becomes. Conversely, the lower the percentage of alloy, the softer and more flexible the gold is.

But exhort one another every day, as long as it is called “today,” that none of you may be hardened by the deceitfulness of sin. – Hebrews 3:13

Immediately we see the parallel: A pure heart is like pure gold— soft, tender, and pliable. Hebrews 3:13 states that hearts are hardened through the deceitfulness of sin! If we do not deal with an offense, it will produce more fruit of sin, such as bitterness, anger, and resentment. This added substance hardens our hearts just as alloys harden gold. This reduces or removes tenderness, creating a loss of sensitivity. We are hindered in our ability to hear God’s voice. Our accuracy to see is darkened. This is a perfect setting for deception.

Now look at what God says:

Behold, I have refined you, but not as silver; I have tried you in the furnace of affliction. —Isaiah 48:10

God refines with afflictions, trials, and tribulations, the heat of which separates impurities such as unforgiveness, strife, bitterness, anger, envy, and so forth from the character of God in our lives.

The possibilities for offense are as endless as the list of relationships, no matter how complex or simple.

As I travel across the United States ministering, I have observed one of the enemy’s most deadly and deceptive traps. It imprisons countless Christians, severs relationships, and widens our existing breaches. It is the trap of offense.

Many are unable to function properly in their calling because of the wounds and hurts that offenses have caused in their lives. They are handicapped and hindered from fulfilling their full potential. Most often, it is a fellow believer who has hurt them. This causes the offense to feel like a betrayal.

In Psalm 55:12–14, David laments, “For it is not an enemy who taunts me— then I could bear it; it is not an adversary who deals insolently with me— then I could hide from him. But it is you, a man, my equal, my companion, my familiar friend. We used to take sweet counsel together; within God’s house we walked in the throng.”

The home, meant to be a shelter of protection, provision, and growth where we learn to give and receive love, is often the very root of our pain. History shows that the bloodiest wars are civil—brother against brother, son against father, or father against son.

The possibilities for offense are as endless as the list of relationships, no matter how complex or simple. This truth remains: Only those you care about can hurt you. You expect more from them—after all, you’ve given more of yourself to them. The higher the expectations, the greater the fall.

Selfishness reigns in our society. Men and women today look out for themselves to the neglect and hurt of those around them. This should not surprise us. The Bible is very clear that in the last days, men will be “lovers of themselves”.

For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, proud, arrogant, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, – 2 Timothy 3:2

We expect this in unbelievers, but Paul was not referring to those outside the church. He was talking about those within it. Many are wounded, hurt, and bitter. They are offended! But they do not realize that they have fallen into Satan’s trap.

Is it our fault? Jesus made it very clear that it is impossible to live in this world and not have the opportunity to become offended. Yet most believers are shocked, bewildered, and amazed when it happens. We believe we are the only ones who have been wronged. This response leaves us vulnerable to a root of bitterness. Therefore we must be prepared and armed for offenses because our response determines our future.

And the Lord’s servant must not be quarrelsome but kind to everyone, able to teach, patiently enduring evil, correcting his opponents with gentleness. God may perhaps grant them repentance leading to a knowledge of the truth, and they may come to their senses and escape from the snare of the devil, after being captured by him to do his will. – 2 Timothy 2:24-26 ESV

“By faith Moses, when he was born, was hidden for three months by his parents, because they saw he was a beautiful child; and they were not afraid of the king’s edict.” (Hebrews 11:23)

Not afraid. Those two words sum up how Moses grew to express such greatness. The parents who gave him life were “not afraid.” They lived with faith over fear. The DNA passed down to their son through this genetic transfer was that of belief.

But even more than that, Moses’ parents’ lack of fear in the face of an evil culture and evil king spared his life. They chose to hide him so he would not be killed, as the king of Egypt had mandated for all male Hebrew newborns. Then, when Moses had grown too old to hide, they came up with an elaborate scheme to position him in a safe and secure place.

The strategy involved placing Moses in a basket in the Nile River near the place where Pharaoh’s daughter bathed, accompanied by her maids. Knowing he was a beautiful baby, they assumed the best of her feminine instincts. And they were right. With one look at this crying infant, she “had pity on him and said, ‘This is one of the Hebrews’ children’ ” (Exodus 2:6).

Moses’ parents knew Pharaoh’s daughter would not be in a position to raise a child on her own. Those types of roles were for servants in that cultural time period. So they’d also placed Moses’ sister, Miriam, where she could keep an eye on the basket and present herself when it was retrieved.

The plan went according to their hopes, and when Miriam offered to find someone to help nurse the boy and care for him in the palace, Pharaoh’s daughter agreed. Miriam was more than willing to offer her mother to do just that.

As we near the end of the murals on the hallway walls, we see the baby being drawn from the basket, we hear the water dropping off the basket as it’s lifted from the river, and from a loudspeaker, we hear the Bible passage that describes the rest of the scene:

Pharaoh’s daughter said to [Moses’ mother], “Take this child away and nurse him for me and I will give you your wages.” So the woman took the child and nursed him. The child grew, and she brought him to Pharaoh’s daughter and he became her son. And she named him Moses, and said, “Because I drew him out of the water” (Exodus 2:5-10).

Not only was Moses’ life spared from certain death in the violent culture he’d been born into, but his mother was paid to nurse him and raise him in the palace. This truth reminds us that we will never discover what God can do until we trust Him to do it. He can do things that blow our minds. Moses’ parents had decided they would not be controlled by the culture, so their decisions reflected alignment under the one, true God.

Living by faith means choosing God’s plan over the culture’s plan, then watching Him work it out for your good and others’ benefit.