Do You Have to Forgive Someone Who Isn’t Sorry?
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Do You Have to Forgive Someone Who Isn’t Sorry?
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What do you do when someone has hurt you deeply – and isn’t sorry?
After Dylann Roof murdered nine people at Emanuel AME Church in Charleston, several family members of those he killed publicly forgave him, even though he showed no remorse. Their response raises one of Christianity’s hardest questions:
Can we forgive someone who refuses to repent?
In this episode, Scott Sauls explores what biblical forgiveness is – and what it isn’t. Forgiveness is not forgetting, minimizing evil, removing consequences, restoring trust, or automatically reconciling. Reconciliation requires the participation of both people. Forgiveness can begin with one.
Drawing from Romans 12, the cross of Christ, and the remarkable witness of the Charleston families, Scott considers how we can tell the truth about what happened, maintain necessary boundaries, pursue justice, and still refuse to let another person’s wrongdoing own the rest of our lives.
Because forgiveness doesn’t mean the wrong was nothing. It means the debt is no longer ours to collect.
Keywords: forgiveness, Christian forgiveness, how to forgive, forgiveness without apology, forgiveness and reconciliation, reconciliation, repentance, boundaries, resentment, Christian living, spiritual growth, Romans 12, Jesus, Christianity