No games, no problem. On the darkest day of the tournament (the one with zero matches), we break down the chaos you missed.

Messi, at 39, dragged a dead Argentina back to life against a scary Egypt side... missed penalty, hit the post, and still demanded the ball. Norway didn't get lucky against Brazil, they took them apart (and Cafu has thoughts on why the old Brazil is gone). USA got run off their own field by Belgium, and instead of crying about it, we get honest about what it actually means.

Plus: Portugal crashing out and Ronaldo's wild "the Euros mean as much as the World Cup" take, Colombia's stunning collapse to Switzerland, and England's genius (or paranoid?) decoy-hotel move against Mexico.

Then we answer a Texan who listed six reasons he hates soccer... one by one.

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Chapters:
00:00 — The dark day (no games) + what we're covering

01:28 — Messi at 39 drags Argentina back vs Egypt

04:23 — Norway dismantles Brazil (+ Cafu on the lost Joga Bonito)

07:30 — USA destroyed 4-0 by Belgium (+ youth & pay-to-play)

12:06 — Portugal out & Ronaldo's "Euros = World Cup" take

15:46 — Colombia's shock collapse to Switzerland

17:34 — England's decoy-hotel plan vs Mexico

19:44 — Mailbag: answering a Texan's 6 complaints about soccer

25:06 — Close

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