Here's a fun summary of Episode 111 "Ironwood Maiden" from the Beat Around the Bench podcast:

• Seafood talk revealed Ross has a shellfish allergy that kicks in after handling more than a pound causing massive hand swelling but still loves Baja tacos blackened redfish and Greek bronzino while Colton goes for rare tuna steaks and Jess craves lobster crab shrimp pasta with creamy tomato sauce
• Jess survived the hottest day on record in Tampa while building his fence throwing up twice from heat exhaustion and losing hearing in one ear but managed to complete the project with neighbors saving twenty six hundred dollars over contractor quotes
• The table from hell saga concluded with Ross delivering the ugly base admitting he hated it getting agreement from the customer and ultimately throwing the whole thing in the garbage after his dad warned he'd be moving it around for four years
• Colton finished a washer board project using gorilla glue spray adhesive for the marine carpet and actually charged enough to make money this time while planning Texas A&M themed stencil work with fabric paint
• House selling struggles continue for Colton with only two showings despite price drops and beautiful renovations as they prepare to pay double mortgages while slowly moving shop equipment without electricity at the new place
• Patreon announcement dropped as the guys revealed they're launching a subscriber service after listener requests with plans for exclusive content merch and special value additions to the podcast community
• Stanley plane history covered Leonard Bailey's revolutionary metal bodied planes from 1858 that replaced problematic wooden versions with original Stanley number ones now selling for fifteen hundred to two thousand dollars among collectors
• Work gear trivia tested knowledge of steel toed boots hard hats and safety equipment with surprising facts like Wolverine inventing steel toes in 1930 and early safety vests being called donkey jackets in Britain
• Heat survival tips dominated discussion as Jess shared cooling towel techniques pickle juice for cramps and the importance of starting early when working in extreme temperatures to avoid heat exhaustion
• Trim installation nuggets emphasized hitting studs instead of just drywall using Loctite adhesive for backing and the stud buddy magnet tool for finding screws in walls plus proper measuring techniques for clean miter cuts

• Colton crushed his metal roof installation project getting thick 26 gauge material for forty four percent savings over Home Depot prices by negotiating in Spanish with his materialist place and completing the whole job in just two or three days
• The new Huffman shop is taking shape with plans for a square garage layout that will provide better wall utilization and center space plus discussions about adding a massive pole barn workshop with concrete floors and big ass fans for ventilation
• Power planning became a major topic as Colton explores running electricity to the shop either aerial or underground with potential for installing multiple poles and a separate electrical panel just for the workshop area
• Ross got deep into traditional mortise and tenon joinery while building his gaming coffee table and shared fascinating history about how this seven thousand year old technique spans every culture from ancient China to modern Japanese timber framing
• The Festool router proved its worth as Ross praised German engineering for features like single wrench bit changes and precision depth adjustments that made cutting perfect joinery almost effortless compared to other brands
• Jess missed the episode due to being buried in late night projects but the guys carried on discussing shop layouts CNC software options and the importance of learning SketchUp for design visualization
• Safety became a real concern as Colton shared his sketchy solar attic fan installation where he nearly fell off the roof twice and had to finish the job while dizzy from exhaustion and heat
• Whiskey of the week featured Old Bardstown Kentucky Straight Bourbon from Willett distillery which Ross described as drinking smoother than its 101 proof with honey and caramel notes but ultimately a one trick pony flavor profile
• Milwaukee nitrile dipped gloves got major praise from Colton for providing amazing grip during metal roofing work while still being touchscreen compatible and breathable enough for hot Texas weather
• Shop organization wisdom emphasized the importance of decluttering regularly and getting rid of wood scraps that have been sitting unused for over a year because clear workbenches lead to more actual woodworking productivity

• Food talk kicked off with favorite pasta dishes featuring Jess loving lobster lasagna and steak gorgonzola pasta while Ross schooled everyone on orecchiette pronunciation and shared that Barilla has Spotify playlists timed perfectly for cooking each pasta type
• Jess struggled through another brutal week including failed coquina shell stucco work that had the customer's wife gasping and walking away after just one wall plus dealing with electrical problems and eight foot six mahogany doors that needed refinishing
• Ross finally finished his nightmare pocket door project that took nine years to complete properly and built a gorgeous walnut cabinet with traditional dovetail joinery using his Harbor Freight jig that worked perfectly on the first try
• Colton became the go-to lacquer repair specialist for Tony's shop after successfully fixing blush damaged cabinets using super blush retarder spray and got called in as their on-call finishing expert
• The guys shared serious summertime survival tips including keeping cooling towels in coolers plenty of fluids sunscreen and aloe vera plus Colton discovered that thirty percent vinegar works amazing for getting smoke smells out of furniture
• Colton started planning his metal roof installation over existing shingles and learned that roofing supply companies often beat Home Depot prices with much thicker gauge materials that last forever
• Wood of the week featured the bizarre monkey puzzle tree from Chile that looks like AI designed a Christmas tree and gets its name because it would puzzle a monkey trying to climb the spiny branches
• Italian food trivia had Ross crushing questions about risotto osso buco and arancini while Colton admitted to completely guessing on most answers but somehow nailed the gnocchi question by pure luck
• Ross shared his sandwich building wisdom about never letting cold cuts touch bread directly and emphasized the importance of taking lazy river style mental breaks to reset from work stress
• Colton introduced the barn cat Squanchy who showed up desperate and friendly and already proved his worth by catching a lizard though the guys debated proper feeding schedules to keep him hunting

• Big baby news as Colton and Crystal welcomed little Charlotte into the world weighing in at eight pounds one ounce and twenty two inches long with Colton getting hands on experience cutting the cord and helping with delivery
• Baby Charlie sparked some hilarious woodworking connections including discovering baby nail rotary tools that work just like Dremels and hospital bassinets that reminded Colton of motorcycle lift workbenches
• Ross finally delivered his table from hell project that turned into an absolute nightmare costing him thousands in CNC work and ending with a customer who refused to pay the remaining twenty four hundred dollars
• The infamous table base that Ross absolutely hated looked like a Civil War submarine according to him but the guys actually thought it was pretty cool with its alien spaceship conference room vibe
• Jess returned after missing three weeks due to a back injury that had him laid up followed by the craziest work schedule ever including beautiful shower tile work and refinishing mahogany doors for million dollar condos
• Trivia time covered everything from coast redwoods being the tallest trees to the Taj Mahal foundations being supported by ebony planks and Sam Maloof being famous for his rocking chairs
• History lesson revealed that Adirondack chairs were originally called Westport chairs and were invented by Thomas Lee in upstate New York but stolen and patented by his buddy Harry Bonnell in nineteen oh five
• Food talk centered around amazing pie preferences with Ross loving strawberry rhubarb Colton obsessing over his Aunt BO pecan pie and Jess perfecting apple pie with cosmic crisp apples and brown sugar crumble
• Nuggets included Jess planning to upgrade to an eighteen foot custom green trailer for maximum mobile workshop efficiency and Colton sharing how lacquer retarder can save blush damaged finishes without stripping
• Ross learned the hard lesson about saying no to unrealistic deadlines and last minute projects while Colton discovered that baby crying is just communication and keeping a positive mindset makes all the difference

• Ross just returned from a blazing hot New York City vacation where temperatures hit 102 degrees for three days straight making 74 degree Chicago weather feel almost chilly when he got back home
• Episode title Deep Purple Heart came from listener Lee Drummond of Dusted Knuckle Woodworks who suggested awesome band name wood species combinations and this one was absolutely perfect
• Colton spotted his neighbor Mo using a completely insane setup with a table saw blade mounted on a weed eater edger attachment which screams OSHA violation but apparently works great for cutting small trees
• Moving madness continues as Colton is exactly one week away from his due date while trying to get their old house ready for market and transfer his entire shop to the new property
• The guys shared practical moving tips including getting a 26 foot box truck with a lift gate and hiring cleaners for 225 bucks to do a full deep clean instead of doing it yourself
• Ross is completely buried working on a massive CNC project that turned into 14 hours of machine time instead of the expected 4 hours plus designing a complex tulip style table base inspired by his son playing with dinosaur puzzles
• Whiskey talk focused on the top five bottles under 30 dollars including Buffalo Trace Elijah Craig Fighting Cock Early Times Bottled in Bond and Bullet Rye as the number one pick for budget conscious drinkers
• Sound engineering season has Ross running audio for bands two or three nights a week all summer long while juggling his woodworking projects and CNC work
• Baby watch intensifies as Crystal tries all the wives tales to induce labor naturally before next Thursday due date with Ross offering solid fatherhood advice about sleep schedules and bonding timelines
• Nuggets included finding inspiration from unexpected places like kids toys and remembering to design spaces for average height people instead of just what works for you personally

• The trio dove headfirst into cheese heaven, debating everything from snacking favorites (smoked gouda and sharp cheddar winning) to grilled cheese perfection, with Jess championing pepper jack for turkey sandwiches and everyone agreeing fake American cheese rules for grilled cheese.
• Colton shared major life updates from his move to the countryside outside Houston, complete with deer rescues, flooded shop plans, and last-minute prep for baby arrival while still renovating both the new homestead and old house for sale.
• Jess vented about contractor headaches and door installation nightmares, including grinding concrete to fit doors and dealing with subs who claim they know drywall but clearly don't, all while juggling multiple job sites in the Florida heat.
• Ross tackled an insane 10-day table build challenge - a 10-foot oval tulip-base dining table with sashiko burning and Rubio black finish for a restaurant client who disappeared for six weeks then suddenly needed it yesterday.
• The Wood of the Week featured Lemonwood, a Cuban hardwood prized for archery bows and fishing rods due to its incredible flexibility and 1880 Janka hardness rating, plus its Brazilian cousin that clocks in at a whopping 3460 on the hardness scale.
• Jess unleashed a brilliant wordplay trivia game where players had to find the missing word that connected two phrases (like "dining...sauce" = table for "dining table" and "table sauce"), keeping everyone on their toes with woodworking-themed brain teasers.
• Ross delivered his top 5 whiskeys under $100 by region, from Japanese Hibiki Harmony to Kentucky's Peerless Double Oak Bourbon, perfect timing for Father's Day gift ideas with detailed explanations of what makes each special.
• The nugget section covered everything from spray foam insulation debates for pier and beam houses to self-retracting ratchet straps and quality buzzy blades, proving practical shop wisdom never goes out of style.

• The guys kicked things off with an epic potato discussion where Ross shared his genius combo of mashed potatoes with Gruyere cheese and tzatziki sauce while Colton described his wild Aloha Slut Potato creation on the griddle
• Ross got himself a brand new GMC Sierra 1500 truck and the crew dove deep into vehicle upgrades including tonneau covers bed extenders and roof racks with plenty of practical tips for truck owners
• Shop organization became a major topic as Ross spent his weekend completely rearranging his workspace for better efficiency and material flow which got everyone talking about the best ways to set up woodworking shops
• Jess dropped some serious knowledge about the history of screws starting from ancient wooden olive presses all the way to modern Torx heads and explained why NASA has the most expensive screws in the world
• The sandwich trivia segment was absolutely incredible as Ross proved he really is a sandwich aficionado by nailing questions about everything from Italian porchetta to Vietnamese banh mi sandwiches
• Colton shared updates on his new house purchase which got complicated when half the land was already sold to someone else but they worked out a deal that saved them around 65 thousand dollars
• Baby watch continues as Crystal is getting close to her due date with little Charlie expected around July 3rd and the guys shared some hilarious pregnancy stories and advice
• Ross blew everyone away with whiskey knowledge by revealing the most expensive bottles ever sold including a 2.8 million dollar Bushmills and explaining why aged spirits cost so much money
• The nuggets section covered cabinet building tricks with Jess explaining how to keep divider panels perfectly square using scrap wood spacers and Ross sharing why drills work better than impact drivers for long structural screws
• Wedding season is keeping Colton busy while he finishes up his kitchen cabinet project and prepares for the big move to their new property with plans for livestock and maybe an above ground pool setup

• The gang kicked off with a mouth-watering breakfast food challenge, debating favorites from Waffle House concoctions (Jess's infamous "slop on a plate") to fancy Eggs Benedict, with Ross revealing breakfast restaurants are cash cows due to cheap ingredients and high margins.
• Colton shared updates on his uncle's DIY sawmill project and his camper shell paint job at his father-in-law's auto body shop, noting surprising similarities between furniture restoration and auto body work.
• Jess walked us through his current kitchen cabinet installation in a metal-stud condo, ranting about challenging blind corner cabinets and the pros/cons of dark blue cabinet finishes.
• The Wood of the Week segment featured cottonwood—a surprisingly useful lumber despite being super lightweight (28 pounds per cubic foot) and soft (430 on Janka scale), commonly used for crates, plywood components, and carvings.
• Ross absolutely crushed Jess in the domestic hardwood trivia challenge, revealing fascinating facts about woods from Puerto Rican mahogany to Florida's bald cypress used in musical instruments.
• Ross delivered a deep dive on whiskey production costs, breaking down the $1,500 price tag for a 4-year barrel before bottling—including grain costs, barrels ($300 each), labor, warehousing, and the inevitable "angel's share" evaporation.
• The nugget section featured practical wisdom: invest in a good laser level for installation work, use proper drill press speed settings for different materials, and always wash your hands thoroughly between steps when working with reactive finishes.