Are Unwritten Rules Running Your Team?
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Are Unwritten Rules Running Your Team?
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Have you ever watched a murmuration of starlings? Thousands of birds, no leader, no plan — moving like one organism. That's not magic. That's emergence. And it's exactly what's happening on your team, whether you're paying attention or not.
This episode is about the invisible architecture of teams — the dynamics that form whether you design them or not. I walk through three layers of how team behavior actually develops, pull from Adrienne Maree Brown's Emergent Strategy, and revisit Kurt Lewin's counterintuitive finding: it's easier to change a group than to change an individual.
I tell two stories that made this real for me. The first: I went to a retreat, had a genuine transformation, came home — and my environment hadn't changed. The environment won. The second: I sat on a board where the defining norm was harmony. Don't disagree with the inner circle. I abstained from one vote. That was enough to break it.
Norms aren't rules. Nobody writes them down. But they run everything.